Raising Amelia
by Preppy Princess 5103
Summary: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions. (Harm/Mac eventually.)
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes:** I'm still working on Giving Things Time. But the events of this story are based on a friend's real life situation, and I just can't help but think this would be fun to write for Harm and Mac, and wanted to get it going before my friend realizes he shouldn't put so much personal stuff on Facebook, and I forget all about it.

**More notes**: This takes place sometime in season five. I honestly haven't decided yet if Brumby and Renee will be a factor in this. I despise them both, and just want to ignore their existence, and some of the incredibly stupid storylines that came from their existence.

**Part One**

"Harm, we need to- "

Mac was cut off by a ringing phone. He shot her an apologetic glance, while reaching for the receiver. "Commander Rabb."

He listened for a moment, and frowned. He looked up at his partner and noticed her curious expression, and he shrugged. "The name doesn't sound familiar, but if you've determined she's harmless you can send her up. Thank you." He hung up the phone and returned his attention to his partner. "Apparently there is a young woman who desperately needs to see me. She's on her way up. And I have no idea who she is."

She raised an eyebrow and grinned. "This should be interesting."

There was a timid knock, and both looked at the door. Standing in the frame was an incredibly young woman and a very small baby. The woman couldn't have been more than twenty-one, and Mac's eyes widened as she looked at Harm. He subtly shook his head and stood. "I'm Commander Rabb. Are you Miss Ellsworth?" The young woman nodded. "Please, come in."

Mac stood and offered the visitor a tentative smile before glancing at Harm. "I'm going to get back to work." He nodded and she left the office, shutting the door behind her.

Harm turned his attention back to his young visitor. "Please, sit." She took the seat Mac had vacated, and he studied her. He had no idea who she was, but she did look vaguely familiar. "What can I do for you, Miss Ellsworth?"

Her tongue darted out to moisten her lips, and she cleared her throat. "Call me Claire. Please." He nodded, and she took a deep breath. "Commander Rabb, I know you're not going to believe this, and I feel like I'm betraying my sister by telling you this," she looked at the baby that was strapped to her chest, and ran a hand over the soft blonde curls, "but this is Amelia. And she's your daughter."

His eyes widened. "I'm sorry, what?"

Claire took another deep breath, and exhaled slowly. "You and my sister had a one night stand a little over a year ago in Pensacola. Her name was Claudia Moore." She studied his face as she spoke, and was relieved to see the recognition at the mention of her sister. "That night resulted in Amelia."

Harm wiped his damp palms on his pants and forced himself to have a seat. "What happened to Claudia?"

She bit her lower lip and forced back the tears she had grown used to. "She died in a car accident about two weeks ago." The baby began to fuss, and Claire stood and began pacing to soothe her. He eyed the baby, trying to see any kind of resemblance. Claire noticed and offered him a tentative smile. "She's four months old, so she looks like any other baby right now. But Claudia had no doubts that she's yours."

"How can she be sure?" He asked, never taking his eyes off of the baby.

"Claudia told me about you the morning after it happened. Her ex-husband had been out of the picture for a while, and there wasn't anyone else after you. When she found out she was pregnant, she told me that the baby was yours." Amelia had stopped fussing, and Claire sat back down.

"Why didn't she track me down? Why didn't she tell me?"

Claire looked down at the infant and then back at Harm. "She didn't want to share her. I know it's not right. I actually tried to convince her to find you and tell you. But she was adamant that she could do it on her own without involving a guy she met at a bar." He winced, and she blushed. "I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "Don't worry about it." He looked at the baby again. "So, what now?" Claire took a deep breath, but despite her best efforts, she began to cry. He moved around the desk to sit in the chair next to her, and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Claire?"

She wiped her cheeks and cleared her throat. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry to lay this on you. I'm sorry I can't do what my sister wanted and raise her myself. But I'm nineteen. I'm a sophomore in college. I'm in a sorority and have a boyfriend. I want to go to medical school. I don't want to be a mother. And I'm hoping that you will accept responsibility for this child, and be her father."

"Why did she name you guardian?" His voice was gentle. This young woman was still a child herself, and none of this was her fault.

"We don't have any family." She sniffed, and ran a hand over Amelia's back. "Our mother died of cancer, and our father was a police officer who died in the line of duty when we were children. Obviously, Claudia didn't expect to die so young. She named me guardian thinking I'd never actually have to do it."

Harm took a deep breath. "Claire, we'll need to do a DNA test to be sure. But if it turns out that I am her father, of course I will take responsibility for her." He glanced at his watch. "If you have a little time, let's run over to the medical center now."

Her eyes widened, and her mouth dropped open. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

* * *

Harm gave Claire directions to the medical center, and told her he would meet her there. He watched her leave, and ran a hand through his hair. This was not happening. He had always been so careful when it came to using protection. He remembered that night. Vaguely. He had used a condom, and Claudia had told him she was on the pill. He walked up to Mac's closed door and tapped gently before opening it.

"You look like hell."

He collapsed into her chair. "Thank you."

She pushed her files to the side and leaned on the desk, resting her chin on her folded hands. "What's going on?"

He shook his head. "I don't really have time to get into the whole story right now. The short version is that she's claiming that the baby is a product of a one-night stand I had with her recently deceased sister." Mac's eyes widened, and he took a deep breath. "I'm meeting her at the medical center to have a paternity test done."

She opened her mouth a few times, but no words came out. "Harm, I am actually speechless."

"Yeah." He stood and walked over to the door. "If anyone asks will you cover for me? I shouldn't be gone long."

She waved a hand. "Of course. Go."

"Thank you." He grabbed his keys and hat from his office, and hurried to the parking lot. He made it to the medical center in record time, and found Claire and Amelia waiting in plastic chairs when he walked in. He made his way through the nearly empty waiting room, and took the seat next to Claire. "Will it be a long wait?"

She shook her head. "The nurse said maybe fifteen minutes or so." He nodded, and looked at his hands. "You must think I'm a really terrible person."

His head shot up and his eyes locked on hers. "Why on earth would I think that?"

Claire shrugged and swiped at fresh tears. "I'm asking a complete stranger to raise my sister's baby so I can have my old life back."

He shook his head. "You are not a horrible person. You're young, and this isn't your responsibility."

"I don't want to be a mother." Her voice was soft, and she smiled as Amelia reached for a strand of her hair. "I've never wanted to be a mother. I didn't even play with dolls when I was little. I would do it though, if I had to. Especially if I were older and settled. But right now, I just can't. I had to withdraw from my classes this semester, since I couldn't take care of her and go to class."

"It's not your responsibility," he repeated. "It took two people to make this baby, and you're not one of them."

Claire nodded. "Logically I know that." She glanced at Harm. "Are you married? Do you have kids? Will you even be able to take care of her?"

His eyes went back to Amelia and he shook his head. "I'm not married. I don't have children. I like kids, and I've always thought I'd have one or two someday, but right now I'm a bachelor. But if she's mine I will take care of her."

Claire nodded again. "Would you like to hold her?" He nodded slowly and watched as Claire freed Amelia from the carrier. She handed her to him, and showed him how to position his arms. Amelia looked up at him, and he felt something inside tighten. She watched them for a moment, and smiled. "You're a natural."

He offered Claire a smile before returning his focus to Amelia. "I have a godson not much older than her."

"Miss Ellsworth?" Both looked up at the nurse, and she smiled. "I'm Nurse Robbins. We're ready for you now." The both stood, and Claire took Amelia and secured her in the wrap and they followed the nurse to an exam room.

"So, we're here for paternity testing?" She looked over the paperwork and frowned before addressing Claire. "You're not the mother?"

Claire shook her head. "No ma'am, but according to my sister's will, I am the legal guardian. I have all of the paperwork with me."

Nurse Robbins made a note and nodded. "We'll be sure to make copies when you're checking out. This is very simple. Just a cheek swab, and we'll have the results in about three days."

* * *

The rest of the day had crawled by. After leaving the medical center, he had gone back to work and found Mac gone for the day. After work he had hurried home to change out of his uniform and into jeans, and now stood in front of her door.

She opened it after the first knock, and greeted him with a smile. "Come on in." She stepped out of the way so he could enter, and shut the door behind him. "How are you?"

He shrugged and collapsed on her couch. "Ask me tomorrow when the shock is gone."

She smiled sympathetically and sat next to him. "What's her name?" He cocked his head, and she smiled. "The baby."

"Amelia."

"That's pretty." Mac picked at something invisible on her pants. "And her mother?"

"Claudia." He sighed and leaned his head back. "We met at a bar my first night in Pensacola. She was in Florida on business. One thing led to another." He sighed and rubbed the heel of his hand over his eyes. "It was one night, and meant absolutely nothing. She was going through a bad divorce, and I was questioning my decision to leave JAG."

She was quiet while she did the math. "And now you potentially have a four-month-old daughter."

"Yeah." He stared at the ceiling, but lifted his head to look at her when he felt her shift.

"What are you going to do?"

"If she's mine, I'm going to step up." His eyes lingered on her face for a minute before he dropped his head back. "Claire, the woman you met today, is nineteen. She's in college. She doesn't want to be a mother. This is my responsibility."

"If she's yours, you know we'll all help however we can." She placed her hand on his shoulder and he covered it with his own.

"I know."

* * *

_**Three Days Later… **_

He reached for the received and tucked it between his ear and shoulder. "Commander Rabb." He swallowed as a medical assistant introduced herself, and asked for his permission to receive the results over the phone. "Yes, that's fine. Please, go ahead."

"The minor child in question is biologically yours. The results are being mailed to your home, but the profile showed a 99.98% probability that you are the child's father."

He swallowed again. "Thank you. Has Miss Ellsworth been called yet?"

"Yes sir. Another assistant is on the phone with her now."

He thanked the assistant again and made his way out of his office and into Mac's. He sat down and met her eyes. "I just got a call from the medical center. She's mine."

Mac let out a breath and leaned back in her chair. "What are you going to do now?"

He sighed and closed his eyes for a long moment. "I guess I have to figure out how to be a single father."

**End Part One**


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes:** The Mac & Harm interaction is minimal in this part, but I will make up for it in the next installment. I don't like it either, but it is what it is. This part and the next few parts will also be a little shorter than what I normally write. Also, yes, I am writing Renee more unlikable than she was on the show. I liked her slightly more than I liked Jordan, but on the list of Harm & Mac's significant others, she's definitely in that #2 spot on the most hated list.

**Part Two**

Harm took a bottle of wine out of the fridge and poured two glasses. And then he poured a little more into one of them. Renee would be here any moment, and he had a feeling she would need it. He sat the glasses and the bottle on the counter, and walked over to his computer. He opened Claire's email and printed out the photo she had sent him of Amelia. He smiled as he looked at the little girl. Her hair was as blonde as her mother's had been, but her eyes were the exact same shade as his. There was a gentle tap on the door, and his fingers tightened on the sheet of paper. He sat the sheet on the printer and went to open the door.

Renee grabbed his shirt in her fist, and pulled him to her for a kiss. She pulled back and wiped the smudge of deep red lip color from his lower lip and grinned. "I don't think this is your color." She noticed the wine on the counter and beamed. "Oh, thank God. I have had one hell of a day." She sat her purse on one of the bar stools and reached for one of the glasses of wine.

He picked up the other glass and took a sip while she began to tell him about her day. He was only partially listening, and instead went through what he was going to say to her about Amelia. He and Renee hadn't been together long, but he was pretty sure she didn't have a maternal bone in her body. He took another sip and then set the glass down. She finished her story and drained the rest of her wine.

She smiled as he poured more of the bottle into her glass, and she edged closer to him. Her fingers danced over his chest, and her smile was enticing. "We should take the rest of this bottle into the bedroom."

He placed his hand over hers and stilled her movement. "I need to talk to you about something first."

She raised her eyebrows and sat the glass down. "Okay. Am I going to like this?"

Harm shrugged. "I honestly don't know how you'll feel about this." He gestured to a bar stool with his chin. "Have a seat." She sat, and he squeezed her shoulder on the way to the printer. He grabbed the print out of Amelia's photo and walked back to her. He placed it on the counter and slid it to her.

Renee glanced at the photo and then back at him. "Who's that?"

He took a deep breath. "That is my daughter. Amelia."

Her face paled, and her eyes widened. "I'm sorry, I think I misheard you. She's your what?"

"She's my daughter."

"Jesus Christ, Harm." She reached for the print out and studied her face. "How do you know she's yours? When did you find out? Who is her mother?"

"I found out a few days ago." She opened her mouth to speak, so he hurriedly continued. "I didn't tell you because I thought I should tell you in person." She closed her mouth, and he saw her glance at the print out again. "Her mother was a woman named Claudia. She and I spent one evening together a little over a year ago. Claudia died in an accident a couple of weeks ago, and her younger sister tracked me down. We had a paternity test done, and she's definitely mine."

Renee let go of the sheet of paper and stood up. "So, what happens now?"

"I'm her father. I'm going to take responsibility and raise her."

She scoffed. "Harm, you have a demanding job. You travel all the time. How on earth are you going to take care of a baby?"

"People do it all the time." He thought of his mother and the years she spent as a single parent – both before his dad went down and after. "I'll have to get help. A nanny maybe. At least a good day care. I'll need to find some baby sitters I can rely on."

She scanned the apartment and frowned. "Where is she now?"

He drained the rest of his glass, and then went for a bottle of water. "She's in Charlottesville with her aunt. Her mother's younger sister, Claire. She's had custody since Claudia passed."

"Can Claire not keep her?"

His eyes narrowed. "Are you kidding me? She's my daughter, Renee. I have to take responsibility. I couldn't live with myself if I ignored this, and left her with a nineteen-year-old girl who never asked for any of this. It's not Claire's place to raise her."

Renee reached for her purse and fished out her keys. "I can't deal with this right now. I'll talk to you later."

* * *

Claire opened the front door and smiled at Harm. "Come on in."

Harm walked into the living room of the small house and looked around the room. The house was small, but nice. "Thank you for having me." Claire had called the day before, and asked if he'd like to come visit Amelia In Charlottesville. They had decided that she would remain with Claire until they appeared before family court, and he had legal custody. He hoped these little visits over the next few weeks would make the transition a little easier.

"I'm glad you could make it on such short notice." She pushed the door shut behind him. "Amelia literally just woke up from her nap. My boyfriend will bring her down in just a minute. Can I get you anything to drink?" He was staring at a framed photo of Claudia and Amelia and didn't respond. She gently touched his arm. "Harm? Can I get you anything?"

He smiled sheepishly and shook his head. "No thank you." He gestured to the photo. "That's a beautiful picture."

Claire grinned. "Jamie, my boyfriend, took that. He's majoring in photography at UVA."

"His work is beautiful."

"Thank you." A handsome young man with a baby in his arms was coming down the stairs. "I'd be happy to send you some of the ones of Amelia if you'd like."

Harm nodded enthusiastically. "I would love that. My mother is already bugging me for more pictures of her." Claire gestured to the sofa, and he followed her.

Jamie extended the baby to him. "Would you like to hold her?" He nodded and accepted her. She looked up at him, and Harm couldn't decipher her expression. Not quite skeptical. Maybe quizzical?

"How did your family take the news?" Claire asked.

He ran his hand over Amelia's soft hair and smiled. "My parents were stunned, but they're absolutely thrilled. They wanted to fly out to meet her immediately, but I convinced them to wait until everything is settled so we won't overwhelm her."

"She has grandparents?" There was longing in Claire's voice, and his heart ached for her.

"She does. My father is deceased, but my mother and stepfather are thriving in the San Diego area. And my grandmother lives in Pennsylvania."

Claire smiled and extended her hand so Amelia could grasp one of her fingers. "I'm glad. Claudia always hated that she wouldn't have grandparents. The time we spent with ours growing up was wonderful. I'm glad she'll have that." She studied the tiny fingers wrapped around her much larger one. "Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

He looked down at her finger and shook his head. "No. Only child here." Claire nodded and he placed a hand on her shoulder. "You're her family, Claire. You will always be welcome in her life. Always. You can be with her as much as you want."

She met his eyes and nodded. "Thank you for that." She looked back down at Amelia. "I don't want to be a mother, but I do love being her aunt."

* * *

The visit went by quickly, and even though more than three hours had passed, it felt like he had only been there for a few minutes when she walked him out to his car. He placed a kiss on Amelia's head and handed her over to Claire. "Thanks again for having me over today."

"You're welcome again." Claire smiled and accepted the baby. "Maybe next weekend we can come visit you, so we can see how she does in a new environment."

He winced. "The thing is, I'm going to have to move sometime before I take her. My apartment is small. It's just a loft. And it's in a terrible neighborhood."

Claire shrugged. "It doesn't matter. It'll still be good for her to be around you in a space that's unfamiliar to her. And I'd like to see how you live."

He nodded, understanding. "Okay then. I'll see you next week at my place. I'll send you an email this week with directions to my apartment." He gave Amelia one last kiss and walked back to his car. He waved to Claire, and began the drive back to DC.

Traffic was lighter than usual, and back in the city in just under two hours. He glanced at the clock on his stereo, and turned his car towards Georgetown instead of Union Station. He was relieved when he saw Mac's car parked outside of her building, and pulled into a space nearby. Harm jogged to her door, and knocked gently. She answered it quickly, as if she had been expecting someone. "I'm sorry I didn't call first."

Mac held the door open wider, a silent invitation for him to come in, and then shut it behind him. "You don't have to call, you know that." There was another knock and she smiled. "One second." She opened the door again and smiled brightly at the impossibly young pizza delivery guy. His cheeks flushed and he fumbled with counting out her change. When he was finally finished, she shut the door and locked it this time before sitting the pizza on the counter, and shoving the change in her purse. "Want some? Or do you and Renee have dinner plans?"

He shook his head. "I'm not seeing her tonight. I'd love a slice."

She gestured at the box. "Help yourself." She grabbed two plates and two bottles of water from the fridge before taking a seat and opening the box. She took a bite of her dinner and then wiped her fingers on a napkin. "Is everything okay?"

"I think so." He took a bite and chewed slowly. "I went to Charlottesville today to spend some time with Amelia."

Her eyes widened. "How did that go?"

"Really well. She didn't cry or fuss when I held her. And Claire gave me a crash course in taking care of a baby. You're talking to a guy who now knows how to change a diaper, warm a bottle, and burp a baby."

She raised an eyebrow and grinned. "You're thirty-six and didn't know how to change a diaper?"

He shook his head. "Other than AJ, I've never been around a baby."

"I think you need to rent the movie 'Three Men & A Baby'." She grinned and ate more of her pizza. He picked an olive off of his slice, and she cocked her head to the side. "What's on your mind, Harm?"

He picked off another olive and sighed. "I'm terrified."

She offered him a sympathetic smile. "That's understandable. People are scared to become a parent when they have nine months to prepare for it. I can't imagine how it would feel to find out you're a father to a four-month-old."

"Claire's boyfriend Jamie was there, and he's a photography student. The house was full of gorgeous photos that he took of Amelia and her mother. I'm scared to take her from the only home she's known. I'm scared that I'm not going to be enough for her."

She wiped her fingers on her napkin again, and placed her hand on his back. "Harm, you're going to be a great dad. And you're not going to be alone. You have a lot of friends, you have your parents, you have Renee-" She was interrupted by a snort, and she studied him. "Renee didn't take it well?"

"That's the understatement of the century." He sighed and pushed his plate away. "She actually asked if Claire could keep her."

Mac's eyes widened. "Seriously?" He nodded, and she let out a low whistle. "Give her time. She'll come around."

He snorted again. "Are you actually defending Renee?"

She shrugged. "It's a lot to take in, Harm. Renee and I may not be each other's favorite person, but I can imagine that finding out your boyfriend has a child is pretty unsettling."

"I know." He took a sip of water and leaned back. "Claire is bringing her out here next weekend. So, she can see how I live, and so Amelia can be with me in an unfamiliar location."

Mac nodded. "That makes sense. I think it's really great how you guys are taking your time with this."

"I'm so thankful Claire suggested it. She said since she's already withdrawn from classes for the rest of the semester, we can take things slow and hold off on me taking her until our court date in a few weeks."

"That's a really good idea. For everyone's sake, especially Amelia's." She placed her hand on his back again and smiled. "You're a good man, Harm, and you're going to be a great father."

He glanced at her and smiled. "How can you be sure?"

She stood up and walked away from him, in desperate need of a little space. "I did agree to possibly have a baby with you someday. I wouldn't have done that if I didn't think you'd be a good dad." His beautiful eyes studied her face. He smiled at the memory of the day AJ was born, while she blushed and looked down at the pizza.

"Thanks, Mac."

"Anytime, Harm."

**End Part Two**


	3. Chapter 3

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes:** No real notes here, just responding to a couple comments (and thank you for the comments, everyone!)

**Alix33**: In my head the pizza was my personal favorite, which is pepperoni, black olive, mushroom and green peppers. I don't really think he was a strict vegetarian (I remember the salad she brought him in season two included shrimp, so maybe a pescatarian, or just a healthy eater). But in my head, Harm just picked the pepperoni off of his slice. At least that's always what I always do when someone offers me pizza and I don't like one of the toppings =)

**MAJ8395**: Harm did use protection. I mentioned in the first part that he used a condom, and the woman he was with was on the pill, but no birth control is 100% effective. The friend I'm basing this story on wore a condom, the woman he was with had an implant, and they also used a spermicide, and yet…

**TV Angel 711**: Mic will not be present in this story. He went to Australia, and was never heard from again =) I debated both his and Renee's roles here, and I finally decided that I did need Renee, but I couldn't stomach both of them.

**Part Three**

_**TUESDAY**_

Harm walked up to Mac's office door and tapped lightly. He opened the door before she could tell him to enter, and raised his eyebrows at the sight that greeted him. She was sitting on the floor leaning against the desk, her legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles for modesty, and stacks of files surrounding her. "What are you doing?"

She glanced up at him briefly, and then returned her attention to her files. "I have zero to do. I had one case, and he plead out today. So, since I am now one of growing number of people in this building with nothing to do, I figured I'd finally file all of these."

He looked around at the stacks and stacks of folders and his eyes widened. "Jesus, Mac. When is the last time you filed anything?"

She shrugged. "There's a first time for everything. What's going on?"

He picked up the stack of folders in a chair, and grinned as she reached for them. He passed them to her and took the seat. "I just got a call from the court scheduler in Charlottesville. Our date has been moved up to next Thursday."

Her eyes widened and she straightened. "That's really soon. Have you found a new place yet?" He shook his head, and she took a deep breath. "Harm, you need to go talk to the Admiral now. You have got to take some leave and get this done. Babies need a lot of stuff. You will not be comfortable in your place once all of her things are there." She paused and studied him for a second. "He does know about all of this, doesn't he?"

Harm nodded. "I think everyone knows now. I told Harriet and Bud, so I could ask their opinions on daycare versus a nanny, someone overheard me and now everyone knows." Mac winced, and he waved her off. "I'm glad they know. It keeps me from having to tell everyone about how I had a completely protected one-night stand and am now the father of a four-month-old. Or maybe I should tell people that part. I know I've at least learned my lesson and I'm done with casual sex."

"Where's the fun in that?" She grinned as his eyes widened. "Kidding."

He smiled and nudged her foot with his. "It's been a while for you. Have you even dated anyone since Dalton?"

She shook her head. "No, and it's going to stay that way indefinitely. But we are not talking about me." There was a knock at the door, and she glanced up. "Enter."

Harriet opened the door. "I'm sorry to bother you, ma'am…" She drifted off when she realized she was on the floor. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. I just needed a bigger surface area than my desk. What did you need, Harriet?"

Harm watched the two women talk for a moment, and then returned to his own thoughts and began putting together a mental to-do list. Get some time off approved, find a better apartment, find someone to rent his current apartment, figure out how to be a single dad to a motherless baby girl. No problem.

"Harm."

He glanced up at the sound of his name. Both Harriet and Mac were looking at him, and he smiled sheepishly. "Sorry. I was putting together a mental to-do list." He cocked his head to the side. "Harriet, maybe you can help. I'm trying to figure out where I should live once I have Amelia with me. Any thoughts?"

"We like our neighborhood, sir. But we do want to buy a house someday with a bigger yard." She glanced at Mac. "Georgetown is nice. Alexandria has some great areas. When are you moving?"

"As soon as possible. The court called and things have been moved up. I should have her by the end of next week." He smiled as Harriet's eyes widened. "My feelings exactly. Claire, her aunt, is bringing her here this weekend to spend some more time together. Even if I haven't moved yet, I'd at least like to know where I want to be."

"This weekend, sir?" Harm nodded. "What are you going to do?"

He shrugged. "I'm not sure. I saw her this weekend at her home in Charlottesville, and it was fine."

Harriet smiled politely. "Sir, she had her toys and books and things to help keep her entertained. Why don't you all come over to our house. We could have a cookout in that tiny back yard."

"That's not necessary," he started.

"I think it's a great idea," Mac contributed. "You said Claire wants to see how you live. This way she can also meet the people who are a part of your life and will be a part of Amelia's."

Harm shook his head. "Harriet, I don't want to impose. And I don't want to overwhelm them." But he could see that it was too late and she wouldn't take no for an answer.

"Sir, it's not an imposition. We'll keep it a very small get together, and if I'm being completely honest, part of the reason I'm offering is because I really want to meet them both. But it'll be great. The kids can entertain each other, she can play with AJ's toys, or take a nap in his crib if she gets tired."

"It is a great idea, Harm." Mac's voice was less eager than Harriet's, and more convincing.

He finally nodded, and they both smiled. He looked at Mac and asked, "will you be there?"

"Try and keep me away." She smiled. "Go talk to the Admiral and then call Claire."

He nodded again, and stood. "Thank you. Both of you."

* * *

**_SATURDAY_**

Claire knocked on the door to his apartment, and looked around nervously. He had been right. She definitely didn't feel safe in this neighborhood. The door opened and she quickly stepped inside. "Have you found a new apartment yet?"

"Well hello to you too."

"Hello. Have you found a new apartment yet?"

He nodded. "I did. I found a great place in Alexandria, and I move in on Monday. The complex has a play area, and there were a ton of kids playing when I took my tour. I talked to a few of the parents who were there, and they were all really happy with the place." Claire nodded, noticeably relieved, and Harm gestured at the baby strapped to her chest. "May I?"

"Yes! Of course! I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "No need to apologize."

Claire handed him Amelia, and smiled as he held her close. "Who am I going to meet today? Will your girlfriend be there?"

He shook his head. "No, she's in Los Angeles working this week. It'll just be a few good friends." He turned his attention to Amelia, and Claire began to walk around the apartment.

"Is this her?"

He looked up and noticed her standing by the bookshelf, a framed photo in her hand. She turned the frame to him, and he shook his head. "No, that's Mac. She was in my office that day you dropped by. She's a good friend, and we work together. The little boy in the photo is AJ, our godson." He glanced at Amelia and smiled. "He just turned one a few weeks ago. He's Bud and Harriet's son." Claire nodded and put the photo down, and he watched as she picked up the one of him and his father. "That's my dad and I." He had told her about his father, and she gently sat the frame down. He watched she ran her fingers over the spines of a row of books and then turned to him.

"Do you actually read? Or are these for show?"

"I read. I don't own a TV. So, I read a lot. Play the guitar some." He noticed her looking around the space and blushed. "My bedroom is back there. You're welcome to go investigate, but I don't feel comfortable showing it to you."

She smiled, and he could see her relax. "This is a little weird," she confessed, "I don't think I've ever been alone in an apartment with a man other than Jamie."

"It is weird," he agreed. "The appearance of propriety is important in the military. Even when I'm in my home and out of uniform, it's hard to push that aside. Go check things out. Snoop around in my medicine cabinet. And when you're done, we'll head over to Bud and Harriet's."

They left his apartment a little while later, and headed towards his car. She watched as he strapped Amelia into the new car seat he had bought the previous day, and smiled when he told her he had taken it to the nearest fire department to make sure it was installed properly. Harriet and Bud didn't live far, and he found a space quickly, right behind a bright red Corvette. He opened the back door to get Amelia, and gave Claire a quizzical look. "I haven't figured this part out, yet. Do I need to get one of those things you have and wear her? Do I carry her? Do I carry the car seat? I ordered a stroller, but it isn't here yet."

She smiled and placed her hand on his arm. "Any of the above are fine." She watched as he unstrapped her, and gently picked her up, and then she followed him up the walkway to the modest town home. He raised his hand, but before he could knock the door opened, and a beautiful blonde woman greeted them. He leaned in to kiss her on the cheek, and then stepped back and smiled.

"Harriet, I'd like you to meet Claire Ellsworth." He watched as Claire and Harriet shook hands, and then smiled at the baby. "And this is Amelia."

Harriet leaned in and clasped her chest. "Oh, she's absolutely gorgeous. I want to hold her as soon as you're settled. Come in, come in!" She held the door open wider, and smiled as they walked inside.

Once inside he saw Mac, and the Admiral on the floor with little AJ and he grinned when they looked up at him. "Every single person in the office would love to see this," Harm teased. Mac rolled her eyes and they both stood, AJ in her arms. "Sir, this is Claire. And this is Amelia. Claire, this is my boss – AJ Chegwidden."

The elder AJ smiled at her, and then at the baby. He held his arms out. "May I?" Harm grinned, and passed his daughter to him. They all knew he had a soft spot for children.

He turned to Mac and smiled at AJ. "Hey buddy." AJ reached for him, and Harm took him from Mac. "Want to play airplane?" He lifted him up and carried him around the room, making the child squeal with delight.

Harriet excused herself and went to check on Bud and the grill, and Mac turned to Claire and held out her hand. "It's good to see you again." They shook and Mac gestured to the couch. "How are you?"

Claire watched the Admiral bounce her niece around for a moment, and then turned to Mac. "I'm doing okay."

Mac studied her, and then glanced at Harm. "Any second thoughts?" She knew her question was blunt, but she needed to know. She needed to protect her friend.

Claire turned sharply, and shook her head. "No. I'm going to miss her so much. But I know this is what's best for her." She blushed. "And for me, as selfish as it sounds."

"It's not selfish." She watched Harm lower AJ and walk over to their boss. "He's a really good man, Claire. You'll never have to worry about her with him. He would literally go to the ends of the earth for someone he loves." She smiled as AJ and Amelia studied each other and turned to Claire. She was watching them as well, a slight smile on her face.

"He's told me I can be as active in her life as I want to be." Her voice was soft and she turned to face Mac. "Does he mean it?"

She nodded. "He really does." She glanced at Harm again. "Come on. Let's go outside." They stood, and Mac headed to Harm. She placed her hand on his back. "We're going outside. Why don't you guys join us." She turned to her boss and cocked her head to the side. "May I hold her?"

Claire watched as Amelia willingly went to Mac, and watched Mac laugh as her chubby hand went to the necklace she was wearing. She glanced up at Harm and wasn't the slightest bit surprised that he was watching the two of them as well.

* * *

Harriet walked over to Claire and sat next to her. "So how are you doing?"

Claire turned to her and offered a slight smile. "I'm doing okay. As well as can be expected, I guess." She heard a shriek of feminine laughter coming from Harm, Mac, Bud, and the children. "I'm sad my sister won't get to see Amelia grow up, and I'm going to miss her like crazy. But this is better for her." She glanced at Harriet and bit her lip. "Can I ask you a question about him?"

"I'll answer it if I can."

"I haven't met his girlfriend yet. What's she like? Is she as nice as Mac? What kind of stepmother would she be?"

Harriet glanced at the others and smiled. Mac was sitting on a blanket, AJ in between her legs. She had her arm around the little boy's belly, and she was smiling at him. She was a natural with children. "I don't know Renee what well," she said honestly. "I've only met her a couple of times, and she hasn't spent anytime with my son, so I'm not sure how she is around children." Claire watched them all with an odd expression, and Harriet placed a hand on her arm. "How was your sister as a mom?"

Claire shrugged, and shifted uncomfortably. "I don't really know." She met Harriet's gaze, and quickly looked at her hands. "She suffered from pretty serious post-partum depression. She never got a chance to actually enjoy her." Claire watched Mac tickle Amelia's foot, and smiled as the baby laughed. The laughing was really new, and the sound delighted her and always seemed to surprise Amelia. "She never got to hear that." She turned back to Harriet. "That's why I'm curious about Harm's girlfriend. I want Amelia to have a really great stepmother."

Harriet let out a deep breath. "Personally, I don't think it'll be Renee." She glanced at Harm. "Please don't ever tell him I said that."

Claire shook her head. "I won't, I promise. What's the story with him and Mac?"

Harriet laughed softly. "That's a question every single person who has ever seen them together has asked at one point or another. They're very good friends. They've worked together for a few years and would do absolutely anything in the world for each other."

"Mac told me he would go to the ends of the world for someone he loves."

"He would," Harriet confirmed, "and she would be the one going after him."

* * *

A few hours later they had said their goodbyes, and Mac walked out to her car with Harm and Claire. She watched as he fastened Amelia into the car seat, and then she knelt to tickle her foot again and say goodbye to her. The baby laughed and she felt something inside her squeeze. She straightened and smiled at Harm and Claire.

"Claire, it was great seeing you." She reached into her purse and pulled out a business card and handed it over. "If you need anything and don't want to deal with a big brotherly lecture from this one, don't hesitate to call." Mac smiled as Harm rolled his eyes, and she leaned into give Claire a hug. "I'm serious," she whispered.

"Thank you." Claire whispered and she squeezed her, and then they parted.

Mac smiled and nodded at Harm, and walked over to her Corvette. He watched her drive away, and then turned his attention to Claire. "Ready?" She nodded and climbed in the SUV. "Thanks for coming, Claire. I know it meant a lot to them to meet you and Amelia."

She turned sharply. "I should be thanking you. You're giving her a really good family."

"You're family too," he reminded her. "Don't forget that you're stuck with us."

They headed back to his place in silence, both lost in their own thoughts. The drive to his apartment took no time, and he unstrapped Amelia and followed Claire over to her car. He strapped her back in, and turned to face Claire. "So, next week."

"Yeah. Next week." Claire smiled. "Are you nervous?"

"Can I be completely honest with you?"

She nodded. "I prefer it."

He took a deep breath. "I'm terrified."

"Good." He raised an eyebrow and she explained. "Parenting is a big deal, and you've had very little time to prepare. If you weren't nervous, I would worry you're not taking it seriously." She leaned against her car and looked up at him. "I think you'll be fine though. It seems like you have a really great support system."

He smiled, thinking of how little he had actually held Amelia that afternoon. His friends had all demanded turns, and before he knew it the day was over and he felt as if he needed a dozen more Saturdays before he would feel ready. "They are great. My only family is out of state, so I feel fortunate to have them."

Claire smiled and looked down at Amelia. She was already asleep. "I guess I should get going."

Harm nodded and followed her over to the driver's side and opened the door for her. "Drive safe, Claire. I'm sure I'll talk to you this week, but I'll see you on Thursday." She nodded and he watched her drive away, and tried to imagine how it was going to be the next time he saw her, when she would be the one watching him drive off with Amelia.

**End Part 3**


	4. Chapter 4

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Four**

Mac glanced up at the sound of a knock on her door frame, and smiled at Harm. He was leaning against the frame wearing worn jeans and a fitted gray shirt, and he looked damned good. "What are you doing here? I thought you were on leave for the rest of the week."

He came into the office and pulled a key fob out of his pocket. He extended it to her. "The movers are finishing up at my place, and I have a couple of hours until it's time to meet them at the new place, so I'm running a few errands. I wanted to give you the spare key to my new place." He watched her turn the fob over in her hands and grinned. "The fob gets you into the gate, my building, and my apartment."

She nodded and reached for her purse. She dug around for her keys and put it onto her ring, and then took off a small key with a blue plastic top. She extended the key to him. "Here's the one for the loft. I'm guessing your new tenant will want this." She dropped the keys back into her purse and leaned back. "Are you sure you wouldn't rather Renee have the new key?"

Harm shook his head. "No, it makes more sense for you to have it. Renee is out of town more than she's here lately. If I get locked out of my place while she's in LA I'm out of luck. Besides, you're my closest friend. My emergency contact. Renee being in the picture hasn't changed any of that."

Mac felt her cheeks redden and smiled. "So, did you come all the way out here just to bring me this?"

"No." He took one of the seats in front of her desk and sighed. "I'm going to be able to handle this. Right?"

"Of course, you will." She reached across the desk and placed her hand over his. "You're going to be a wonderful father. There's going to be an adjustment period, and it won't always be easy, but it's all going to be okay."

He placed his hand over theirs and squeezed. "Thanks Mac."

"Anytime." She glanced at their hands and looked away. "Need any help getting settled in the new place?"

His eyes widened. "Are you really asking, or just asking to be nice?"

She grinned and shrugged. "Depends on your answer." He tossed a paper clip at her and she laughed. "I'm kidding. I wouldn't ask if I didn't mean it."

"That would be wonderful. I don't care what my room looks like, but I at least want the living room and Amelia's room in order."

Mac cocked her head to the side. "Do you have furniture for her yet?"

"I do. Claire was offered me most of the furniture in her room at Claudia's house, since none of it will fit in her apartment. I went up there yesterday and got it and spent some time with them. Claire walked me though her bedtime routine." He shook his head and grinned. "I had no idea how long it took to get a baby ready for bed."

She laughed. "That was nice of her to give you the furniture."

"She wanted to give it to me, but I made her take money for it. It's really nice though." He leaned forward and folded his arms over the edge of her desk. "My mom has been putting together all of these design ideas for her room. I'm glad I saved a little on the furniture, because I think her ideas are going to cost me a fortune."

Mac's laugh was cut off by the ringing phone. She reached for it and then put the caller on hold and looked at Harm. "I need to take this. What time would you like me to stop by tonight?"

He grabbed a notepad and scribbled down his address. "Whenever is good for you. That's the address." He smiled and headed for the door. "Thanks, Mac. I really do appreciate it."

She smiled and nodded. "I'm happy to help. You know that. I'll come by after work." He nodded and walked out of the office, and she picked up the receiver. "Sorry about that, Captain. How can I help you?"

* * *

Mac double checked the silver numbers mounted on the door, and then knocked gently. He opened the door a moment later and smiled broadly. "Perfect timing. Come on in." He held the door open and backed out of the way so she could enter. He gave her an appreciative once over. She had obviously gone to her place and changed first, and wore form fitting workout pants, and a pale blue tank top.

She scanned the living room and smiled. "This is really nice." The apartment was in a fairly new building. It had an open floorplan, with hardwood floors, modern appliances, dark cabinets, granite countertops, and huge windows.

"Thank you." He gestured to a small hallway. "The bathroom and bedrooms are that way. Come see." He began walking and she followed him. The first door he opened revealed his bed and little else. She stepped into the room and walked to the sliding glass doors, which opened to a small balcony, and then opened up the two other doors. One lead to a large walk-in closet and the other to a decent sized bathroom. "This is obviously my room."

She turned and grinned. "The king-sized bed was a pretty good giveaway. This is a huge room for an apartment."

"Yeah, tell me about it. Come see Amelia's room." She followed him out of his room and into the bedroom across the hall.

He opened the door, and she smiled. The room was currently the same renters white as the rest of the apartment, but it would be beautiful when decorated. There was a huge window seat, with a few stuffed animals on the padded seat. The furniture was all solid white and modern, with clean lines. She ran her hand over the edge of the crib, and felt the same tightening in her chest that came these days anytime she held a baby. "This is really beautiful, Harm. I can't wait to see it once it's decorated."

"My mom requested photos, so she could get a color palette put together." He grinned as she laughed. Her hand was still on the railing of the crib, and he couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt. He knew she wanted a baby desperately, and yet he was the one bringing one home. He thought back to their pact on the steps of headquarters, and walked over to her. He placed his hand on her arm and squeezed gently. How did he tell her that he was still willing to make good on their deal in four years without sounding like a jerk? Would she even want a part of that anymore? Would she want her baby to have a half-sibling? Would she, or anyone really, think less of him for having two children by two different women? He cleared his throat and dropped his hand. "Is everything okay?"

She turned to him and nodded. "Everything is good. We better get to work."

He watched as she walked past him and into the living room, and he took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before following her.

* * *

Two hours later he had all of the kitchen boxes unpacked and everything put away, and she was almost finished with the last box of books. He walked into the living room and collapsed on the couch, not caring that it was still covered with moving blankets. He glanced at her and smiled. He was constantly thankful for her friendship. "Can I buy you dinner?"

She turned her attention from the books and raised an eyebrow. "Harm, I'm sweaty and covered in dust. I don't think we're in any shape to go out."

He hopped up and walked over to her. He took the books from her hand and shoved them on the shelf. "We'll order in. There's a good Thai place down the street that delivers. And there's always pizza."

"Thai sounds perfect. Order me the pad kee mao with beef. I'm going to go wash up."

He watched her walk away, and then picked up his cell phone to call and order their dinner. Once he hung up, he headed back to Amelia's room, and opened one of the boxes that Claire had sent along with the furniture. Inside were clothes. He pulled out a tiny pink dress and marveled at it. How on earth was he supposed to take care of something that fit into something this tiny. He hung the tiny dresses on the tiny clothes hangers and started hanging them in the closet. He heard the bathroom door open at the same moment the phone rang.

"Want me to get that?" She called out.

"Sure. The phone is in the kitchen. Thanks!" He heard her answer the phone, and after a long pause he heard her greet Renee. "Shit," he muttered. He dropped the dress he was holding back into the box and headed toward the kitchen. He ran into Mac in the hallway, and she wordlessly handed the phone to him. He mouthed an apology, and she waved him off and disappeared into Amelia's room. He watched as she picked up one of the boxes of baby clothes and then shook his head and turned his attention to the phone call and walked into his bedroom. "Hey Renee."

"Harm, why is she there?"

He rolled his eyes and opened a box of his own clothes. "Renee, she's here because she's my friend, and she offered to help."

Renee scoffed. "Oh, I'm sure."

"Renee, stop. Now." He took a deep breath and squeezed the t-shirt he was holding. "Stop. She's my friend, I'm picking up Amelia tomorrow, my apartment is a wreck, and she offered to help. I'm not going to apologize for having a female friend in my apartment."

"It seems like she's more than just a friend." He was silent as he thought back to the ferry in Australia. "Harm?"

"We're just friends, Renee. She's one of my closest friends, but just a friend." He heard a knock on the door and felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the food delivery person. "Renee, someone is at the door. I need to go. I'll call you tonight before I do to bed. Okay?"

She was silent for a long moment, and finally sighed. "Fine. I'll talk to you later."

He ended the call and hurried into the living room. Mac had opened the door and was handing the delivery guy a couple of bills. She smiled and waited patiently as he counted out her change, and then took the bag of fragrant Thai food. She shut the door and turned to find Harm. He pulled out his wallet and was taking out money. "I'm sorry Mac, I was going to buy you dinner."

"Don't worry about it. You can buy next time." She glanced around the apartment. "Where should we eat? Where are your barstools?"

"My old ones were too tall for these counters. Let's eat the coffee table." He grabbed two bottles of water and she carried the food. They settled on the floor and opened their containers.

Mac took a few bites of her noodles and felt his eyes on her. She glanced up and saw him staring. "What?"

"I've been thinking about our deal over the past few weeks." He took a breath and grinned sheepishly. "I just wanted to let you know that Amelia doesn't change anything. In four years if neither of us are in a relationship…" He trailed off, and grinned as she finished the thought.

"… we'll go halves on a kid." She smiled and then winced as she thought of Renee's phone call. "I'm sure Renee will take this arrangement really well."

He snorted. "Probably about as well as Jordan would have when we first made the deal."

She blushed, and realized he was right. Whenever she thought about that moment, she always seemed to forget that he had been in a relationship at the time. She took a bite of her noodles and then took a deep breath. "Your girlfriends never like me."

His eyes widened, surprised she actually said the words. They both knew it – his girlfriends had always been uncomfortable with his and Mac's closeness – but neither of them ever commented on it. "You and Jordan seemed to get along well. That night at Bud's wetting down you all seemed to be having a good time."

Her bite of food froze in the air, and after a minute she sat the fork down. "I guess I never told you about the conversation that she and I had that night."

Harm froze and cocked his head to the side. He felt like they were veering into dangerous territory, but his curiosity was powerful, and he wanted to hear what she was going to say. "You definitely never told me."

She smiled and picked at her food. "Carolyn was asking Jordan about your sexual prowess." She laughed as he turned bright red. "Don't worry, she was very complimentary. But she asked me what I thought. She, and everyone at JAG apparently, assumed we were having sex every time we went out of town together." His jaw dropped slightly and she shrugged. "I corrected them obviously, but who knows if they believed me. But later that night she and I were playing darts, and I told her I was envious of her having a hot, new romance. And she told me that sometimes she thought it would last forever, and other times she thought it would only last until I decided I wanted you."

"She did not!" He was floored.

Mac nodded. "She did. It stunned me. Not just her thoughts, but she was so matter of fact about it. I feel like if Renee had said that we would have ended up throwing the darts at one another." He laughed and took a bite of his dinner. "I'm sorry that your girlfriends have issues with me. I know it puts you in an awkward spot."

He placed his hand on her shin and squeezed gently. "Those are their issues, Mac. They'll have to learn to deal with it. You're one of my closest friends, and that's not going to change."

She placed her hand on his and squeezed gently. "Thank you."

* * *

Their appearance before the judge had barely lasted a five minutes, and it wasn't long before their small group stood in the parking lot, saying their goodbyes. Jamie said goodbye to Amelia first and then shook Harm's hand. He handed the baby to Claire and felt his heart constrict as she held her niece close and cried softly.

Harm watched, feeling sympathy for the young woman. He knew she would be relieved to have her life back, but could only imagine how giving away this living piece of her sister felt. After what felt like a lifetime, Claire lifted her head, placed a kiss on the top of Amelia's head, and then handed her to Harm. He fastened her into the car seat, and then turned back to Claire. She had wrapped her arms around her middle and was crying harder. Harm stepped closer and pulled her gently into his arms.

"You will always have a place in her life," he whispered into her hair. "Always." He could feel her nod, and held her tighter. "You will always be her family."

Claire pulled back and wiped her face with the feel of her hand. "You say that now. What if you get married and have more children?" She continued to cry, and he placed his hands on her shoulders.

"No matter who I marry, or how many other children I have, you will always be her family. I won't ever marry anyone who doesn't accept that." His voice was kind, but firm, and she melted into him again. "We can go back inside and have that put in writing right now if you want."

She stepped back again, and shook her head. "You're a good man, Harm. Thank you." She reached for Jamie's hand and squeezed. "I guess we should let you guys get on the road."

He glanced at his watch and winced. It was later that he thought, and DC traffic this time of day would be an absolute nightmare. "Yeah, we probably should. Traffic is going to be bad." He reached for Jamie's hand, and then gave Claire another hug. "I'll call when we get there, just to let you know that we made it, and she's okay."

"Thanks, Harm." She leaned into the back of the SUV and gave Amelia a kiss goodbye, shut the door, and stepped away from the car. She watched him give them a little wave, walk around to the driver's side, and then drive away.

Jamie put his arm around her shoulders and gave her a little squeeze. "It'll be okay, Claire." She nodded and he leaned in for a kiss. "Come on. Let's go home."

**End Part Four. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Five**

"Excuse me."

Harriet looked up at the attractive older couple and her eyes instantly went to check for visitors passes, and then offered them a smile. "How can I help you?"

The woman smiled and extended her hand. "I'm Trish Rabb, and this is my husband Frank. I was supposed to meet my son, Harm, here at 1:00. He didn't answer when the guard called, but since we were on the list, he sent us up. I don't know which office is his, and I- " The man placed his hand on her arm, and the babbling stopped. "I'm sorry. I'm a bit nervous."

Harriet smiled and stood. She extended her hand. "Nice to meet you, ma'am. I'm Harriet. Unfortunately, he's still in court." She glanced at her watch. "They should have been finished by now, but whenever the Commander and the Colonel are on opposing sides, things often get a little chaotic."

Trish smiled, and glanced around. "Should we leave and come back? Or is there somewhere we can wait."

"I'd be happy to show you to his office. You're welcome to wait there. We also have a very nice patio, if you'd like to wait outside and enjoy the day."

Trish winced. "I'm not used to this Virginia humidity. I'd love to wait in his office if that's alright."

They were making their way to Harm's office, when they heard the elevator ding and raised voices coming into the bullpen. All three turned towards the voices, and Trish couldn't help but smile. Her son was so incredibly handsome in his uniform, and looked so much like his father. He was bickering with the stunningly beautiful, dark-haired woman walking next to him, and a shorter man was trailing behind them, his head moving back and forth between the two.

Harm trailed off when he saw the visitors, and his face immediately broke into a large smile. He hurried away from Mac and Bud, and wrapped his arms around his mother. After a moment they broke apart, and he extended his hand to his stepfather. "I'm sorry to have kept you both waiting." He placed a hand on his mother's arm. "Let me show you around, and then we'll go grab lunch."

His mother shrugged off his hand and approached Mac. She cocked her head to the side and smiled broadly. "Are you Sarah MacKenzie?"

Mac glanced at Harm, and then back at Trish. "Yes ma'am, I am." She held out her hand. "It's nice to meet you."

Trish took her hand and pulled her to her for a hug. "I have wanted to meet you for so long." She pulled back and beamed at her. "We're going to lunch, please join us."

She shook her head. "I'd love to ma'am, but I have a meeting that I can't miss." She glanced at Harm again, and scowled.

"Please, call me Trish." She noticed the scowl and was curious about the chaos in the courtroom that Harriet had mentioned. "If you can't come to lunch, will you join us for dinner?"

Mac glanced at Harm and saw a slight smile on his face. She turned back to Trish. "I'd be happy to. Now if you all will excuse me; I have to get to my meeting."

Trish watched her walk away, and turned to her son. He was watching her walk away, his devastatingly handsome smile in place. "What did you do?"

He rolled his eyes and then smiled again. "I out-lawyered her. Come on. Let me show you guys around."

* * *

Harm tossed the pasta with the homemade pesto, and glanced at the oven timer. His parents and Mac should be here any minute. He heated a pat of butter in a large skillet, and once it had melted, he tossed in the pound of uncooked shrimp and then turned his attention to Amelia. She was in her bouncy chair, and was watching him with her huge blue eyes. He was so excited for his mother and Frank to meet her.

It had been just over a week since he had brought her home from Charlottesville. He and Claire had talked on the phone a few times, and things were going better than any of them could have hoped. Amelia had adjusted quickly, and had remained the same happy baby she had been with Claire. He had even called a child psychiatrist to make sure that was normal – he and Claire had both expected her to be fussy. The psychiatrist had told him that all of the changes she had been through could actually have helped make this transition easier for her. He knelt to her level to tickle her foot, and grinned as she giggled. He heard a knock on the door, and placed a kiss on her forehead before going to answer it. He smiled at Mac and opened the door wider. "Come on in, I have to check on the shrimp." He walked back to the stovetop, and stirred the shrimp. "Are you still mad at me?"

Mac walked inside and hung her purse on the hook by the door. "A little. But dinner smells good enough that I might forgive you entirely." She smiled at the sound of his laughter and followed him into the kitchen. "Is Renee coming over tonight? I'm sure she's anxious to meet your parents." She saw his back straighten, and she noticed the table was set for four.

"No, we're all going to go out tomorrow night. She made reservations at some new place in the city."

"She wasn't supposed to come over tonight, was she? When your mom asked, I couldn't say no. But you could have told me-"

"Mac. Relax." He turned to face her and smiled. "I had no plans to see Renee tonight. And I'm really glad you're here."

She took a breath and smiled. "Okay. Can I help with anything?"

"No, everything's under control." He gestured to Amelia and grinned. "Go on. I know I'm your second favorite person in this apartment." He watched as she blushed, and made her way to Amelia to unhook her from the seat. He turned back to the shrimp and smiled. He pulled the skillet off of the burner and was tossing the shrimp with the pasta when there was another knock on the door. "Do you mind getting that?"

She placed her hand on his arm as she walked to the door. "You're still my favorite." She squeezed lightly, and went to open the door. Trish and Frank waited on the other side, and she greeted them with a smile. "Hi there! Come on in."

Trish's eyes were immediately on the baby in her arms, and she inhaled sharply. "Oh, she's absolutely gorgeous." She held out her arms. "May I?"

"Of course." Mac passed the baby to Trish, keeping a hand on her back a moment longer than necessary.

Frank moved to stand behind his wife, and stroked Amelia's arm. He looked up as Harm approached and smiled warmly. "She's beautiful, Harm."

Harm smiled, and watched his mother and daughter bounce and sway together. "Thank you." He glanced at Mac, and then back at Frank. "I'm sorry, I think I forgot to officially introduce the two of you earlier. Mac, Frank. Frank, Mac." They shook hands, and then their attention was back on Amelia. "Dinner is ready."

Trish looked pained at the thought of putting her granddaughter down, and Frank put his hand on her waist. "Come on. Let's eat. You can hold her for the rest of the night."

* * *

Harm left his parents in Amelia's room, and headed back to the kitchen. He watched Mac put away the leftover pasta, and eyed the clean pots on the drying rack. "You didn't need to wash those. But thank you."

She dried her hands on the dish towel, and shrugged. "I don't mind. I wanted to give your family some privacy." She put the towel back on the hook and turned to face him. "Your parents are great. I'm glad I finally got the chance to meet them."

He leaned against the counter and smiled. "The feeling is mutual. My mom has been asking about you for years."

Frank poked his head out of Amelia's room. "Harm, which drawer did you say her pajamas are in?" He started to speak when someone knocked at the door.

Harm looked at the door, then back at Frank. "Mac, can you get the door? I'm going to go give them a hand." She nodded, and he went back to his daughter's bedroom. She opened the door, and inwardly groaned when she saw Renee on the other side.

"Renee. Hi."

Renee's eyes widened, and she pushed past Mac and walked into the apartment. "What are you doing here?"

Mac took a breath and pushed the door shut. "I was invited for dinner. What are you doing here?"

Renee's eyes narrowed to slits. "I'm his girlfriend. I have the right to be here."

Mac crossed her arms over her chest and shrugged. "You need to take that up with him, not me. He's my friend, and if he invites me over for dinner, I have no reason to say no."

Harm walked out of Amelia's room, and froze when he saw Renee. "Hey, what are you doing here?" He walked up to her and kissed her cheek. "I thought you had plans with your girlfriends tonight."

"Plans change. This is a cozy little scene."

Harm glanced at Mac and saw her roll her eyes and head to the door. She picked up her purse and glanced at Harm. "I'm going to head out. Thank you for dinner."

He shook his head. "Mac, you don't need to leave."

"I think it's for the best." She offered Harm a tentative smile, and then left the apartment.

They both watched her leave, and then Renee turned to Harm. "Why is she always here?"

"Renee, I'm not getting into this with you again." Harm placed his hands on the counter, and dropped his head momentarily. After a few breaths, he looked up. "I'm so tired of having this conversation."

"Well, I'm tired of the fact that every time I call or stop by, she's here." She walked to the cabinet where he kept the glasses and pulled out a wine glass and picked up the bottle that was sitting on the counter. There wasn't much in the bottle, so she emptied it into the glass. "I've seen the way she looks at you. And at Amelia. She wants both of you, and I'm just supposed to stand back and watch her weasel her way in?"

He rolled his eyes. "Jesus Christ, Renee. She's not trying to weasel her way in. She's my friend. She cares about Amelia. Please stop with the insecurity."

"Are we interrupting?"

Both turned at the sound of Trish's voice, and Renee paled. Harm straightened, and walked over to her. He placed his arm around her waist and forced a smile. "Mom, Frank, I'd like you to meet Renee."

* * *

Trish pretended to study her menu, while she actually studied Renee. They were in a restaurant that was much too trendy, at a table that was much too small, and Frank had already nudged her three times. Their meeting the previous evening had been quick, and Renee had hurried out almost immediately after the introductions. Now she was sitting across from her son's girlfriend, trying to figure out what he saw in the girl. Yes, she was pretty. But she was pretty in an obvious way. Her hair was styled too carefully, her dress was too tight, and the neckline was too low. Her heels were too high, and she wore too much makeup. She couldn't help but think that anyone who wore that much makeup was not compatible with someone who wore a dry-clean only white uniform.

Frank nudged her again, and she realized she had been staring. She lowered her eyes to the menu and settled on a shrimp dish. Renee seemed nice enough, but she wasn't right for her son. She had felt that instantly. And then when she saw her with Amelia, she had known. The nanny Harm had hired was watching the baby while the four of them ate this pretentious 'adults only' dinner. Amelia had studied Renee as they prepared to leave the apartment, and the look Renee gave her was positively disdainful. It was a stark contrast to the way Mac had been with her the night before. Now there was a woman who was more appropriate for her son.

"Mom."

Trish looked up, startled. She noticed Frank trying very hard to bite back a grin, and she turned to Harm. "Yes, darling?"

"Renee was asking about your gallery."

She flushed. How long had she been lost in her own thoughts? "I'm sorry, Renee. What did you want to know?"

"I was just asking what kind of art you exhibit. I've been to some pretty crazy exhibits in LA."

"Oh, nothing crazy." Trish sipped her wine and smiled. "Lately I've been really into photography exhibits. The last three artists who've had showings have all been fantastic black and white photographers. But I showcase a little bit of everything. I'm actually quite excited about a local sculptor who's doing a show in a couple of weeks." The waitress approached to take their orders, and everyone noticed the smile she directed at Harm as she took his menu. Trish noticed Renee's face harden, and she wondered for the umpteenth time why her son always seemed to be drawn to insecure women. The waitress couldn't be more than twenty-two. There was obviously nothing to be insecure about, and yet… Trish held in a sigh, and then forced a broad smile. "Renee, please tell me more about your work."

* * *

Dinner was more or less uneventful, but Trish was thrilled to finally get back to their hotel room. Renee had grown on her over the course of the evening. She found her to be polite and intelligent. She was well traveled, had interesting stories, and seemed to be genuinely crazy about Harm. And she was now certain beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was not the right woman for her son.

She walked into the bedroom of their suite and began to undress. Frank followed her and sat down on the bed. "What's on your mind, sweetheart?"

Trish put her earrings back into her jewelry pouch, and untucked her blouse. "I liked her more than I expected to, but she's all wrong for him. He leaned back to study her, propping himself up on his hands. She gnawed on her lower lip, and sat next to him on the bed. "He always goes for these insecure, neurotic women. And I can't help but feel like it's all my fault."

His eyes narrowed, and he sat up straighter. "How on earth is that your fault?" He tugged her into his side, and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

She nuzzled his shoulder and sighed. "I was so lost when his father disappeared. I was a basket case, and my little boy felt like he had to take care of me. He was only six, and he was so sad, but he tried to stay strong for me. And now he always seems to go after needy women. If I had been stronger for him, maybe he would be in a better place when it comes to relationships."

He placed a kiss on her temple. "You can't think that way, sweetheart." He stroked her hair, and gave her another kiss. "He's going to be okay. He may be drawn to these needy women, but you have to have noticed that he's never managed to settle down with one of them. I think he realizes deep down that he needs more than what he's had. He wants a partner."

"He has a partner."

Frank glanced at her, and grinned. "He does. And they'll figure it out sooner or later."

She smiled and stood. "You see it too?"

"Absolutely." He watched his wife take off the rest of her jewelry and start on her nighttime routine. "They'll figure all of it out."

**End Part Five**


	6. Chapter 6

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Six**

_**Three Weeks Later…**_

Mac walked out of the break room and stopped in her tracks. Harm was making his way through the bullpen, carrying Amelia and struggling with her diaper bag and his briefcase. "Need some help?"

He turned to look at her and nodded. "Yes, please. Where the hell is everyone?"

She took the diaper bag and draped it over her shoulder, and then took the briefcase. They walked to his office, and she sat the bags in one of the chairs. "Bud, Mattoni, and Imes are in the conference room. Harriet's out today with AJ. He has an earache, and wasn't allowed in daycare. As for everyone else- " His face paled and she stopped talking. "What's wrong?"

"Harriet's not here?" She shook her head, and he cursed under his breath. "I'm screwed. My nanny was in a car accident this morning. She's fine, but I have no childcare. I was hoping I could beg Harriet to look after her while I'm in court."

Mac gave him a sympathetic smile. Her smile grew when Amelia reached for her. "I can watch her for a couple of hours. And by watch her, I mean we can set up the pack-in-play in my office, and she can hang out while I work." Amelia whimpered, and Harm shifted to hand her to Mac.

He watched them for a moment, and smiled. "I can't ask you to do that. I'll figure something out."

She shook her head, and pried her hair out of Amelia's tiny fingers. "I have to go to Quantico this afternoon, so I'll need you to get her by noon, but it's no problem for her to hang out in my office this morning."

He grabbed the pack-in-play he kept in the corner of his office and grabbed the diaper bag, and they made their way to Mac's office. He set it up and kissed his daughter's forehead. "You're a lifesaver, Mac. I owe you big time."

She waved him off. "Don't worry about it. But do me a favor, and find a few back up baby sitters for situations like this."

"That's getting bumped to the top of my to-do list." He watched Mac settle Amelia, and was overwhelmed with a confusing mixture of gratitude and affection for his partner. "I have to get to court. Thank you so much. Really."

"You're welcome. Now go." He grinned, and she watched as he hurried back to his office for his briefcase, and then hurried to the elevator. She shut her office door, and sat down behind her desk. She looked at Amelia, who was looking up at her with Harm's beautiful eyes. "I haven't spent much time alone with babies," she said. "Go easy on me, okay."

* * *

Renee walked into the JAG bullpen, and scanned the busy space. Harm's office was dark, his door was shut, and she frowned. They had made plans to go for lunch today. She hadn't been able to reach him all morning, and now he was nowhere to be found. She looked for a familiar face, and came up empty. Where was Harriet when she needed her. Her eyes went to Mac's office and groaned when she saw the light on, and Mac behind the desk. She took a deep breath and approached the door. She knocked gently, and opened it after a moment.

Mac looked up, and was startled to see Renee standing in the doorway. "Renee. What are you doing here?"

"I was supposed to meet Harm for lunch, and I- " She stopped talking when she noticed the pack-in-play in the corner of the office. The color drained from her face, and she looked from Amelia to Mac. "What is she doing here? Are you his babysitter now?"

"Shut the door." Mac's voice was cold, and she pushed back from her desk and stood. Renee entered the office fully, and shut the door. "He's in court. His nanny was in a car accident this morning. He brought Amelia here, hoping that Harriet would watch her, but Harriet isn't here today. So, yes. I'm helping out."

"You are always helping him out. And I am so tired of it. He's not your man, and she's not your baby. You need to back off." Renee paced in the small empty space, and then turned to face her. "You're in love with him, aren't you?"

Mac leaned against the windowsill. "I'm not going to answer that."

Renee scoffed. "Because I'm right?"

"Because my answer doesn't matter." Mac walked around the desk and faced her. "I could tell you that I'm not in love with him, and I'm no threat to you until I'm blue in the face, and you'll never believe it. But what happens if I tell you I am in love with him? You give him some ridiculous ultimatum, and tell him he can't be around me anymore?" She gestured at the window that connected their offices. "Please tell me how that's going to work." Mac crossed her arms over her chest. "Harm and I have been friends for a long time. I'm not going anywhere."

Renee took a step closer. "And yet I'm the one who gets to sleep with him."

Mac knew Renee was looking for a reaction, and refused to give her what she wanted. "And you're welcome to that part of him. Like I've been telling you for months - we're just friends."

"Am I interrupting?"

Both women turned to the door, and saw Harm standing in the opening. "Good, you're here." Mac said. "I need to get to Quantico."

"Mac," Harm started.

She shook her head. "I've got to get to Quantico." She picked up her briefcase and tucked some papers inside, and then grabbed her purse. "Will you shut the door and get the light when you leave?" He nodded and she knelt to kiss Amelia's head. "I'll see you both later." Mac walked out of her office, leaving Harm and Renee standing there, staring at each other.

Renee opened her mouth, and Harm cut her off. "Renee, I really can't get into my friendship with Mac right now. I know we were supposed to have lunch, but I'm not going to be able to. I'm sorry." He picked up Amelia and extended her to Renee. "Can you hold her for one second while I take apart this thing?"

She stared at the baby, and took a breath. "I have to go."

"Renee, wait."

She shook her head. "I can't. I have to go."

* * *

Harm opened the door, and stared silently at Renee. He shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans and stepped out of the way. She hung her purse on the hook and shut the door behind her. He picked up a beer bottle from the counter and took a swig.

"Can I get you anything?"

"No, thank you." She perched on the edge of a barstool, and folded her hands together. "I'm sorry for leaving so quickly today."

"Why won't you hold Amelia? She's been with me full time for a month now, and you've never held her. You've barely even looked at her." She was quiet, and he took another swig from the bottle. "I don't understand, Renee. When we first started dating you told me you like kids. You told me you wanted kids someday. So why do you refuse to connect with my daughter?"

Renee flattened her hands against the counter, and took a breath. "Because she's YOUR daughter. Harm, I want children of my own someday. Someday as in years down the road We haven't even really had time to be a couple, and now you're a father, but I don't want to be a mother to someone else's child."

"So why not just tell me that? Why not end things? Amelia isn't going anywhere. She's a permanent part of my life now, and if that's something that you can't accept why not just end things instead of just picking fights with me about Mac." He watched her face contort, and she stood. "Were you hoping I'd be the one to do it? Break up with you, run to her, and then you'd be able to tell everyone that you were right and I was secretly in love with her this whole time?"

"Mac. It always comes back to Mac. I am so sick and tired of her. I'm tired of her, I'm tired of you and her." She left the kitchen, and walked around the living room before coming back to the counter. "She's not just a friend, Harm. You and I both know that, and that's why your relationships keep failing. The women in your life aren't needed for anything other than sex, because for everything else you have her."

"She's just a friend." His tone was softer. "There isn't anything going on between us, Renee. There never has been."

She took a deep breath. "Would there be if it weren't for the military?"

He thought back to the night in Australia, and then shrugged. "I don't know."

Renee offered him a sad smile. "You do know, Harm." She looked down the hall towards Amelia's room. "Did you know that other than today, you've never asked me to hold her? You've never asked me to babysit. But you have no problem asking her."

"I didn't ask her, Renee. I brought Amelia to JAG today hoping Harriet would watch her. She wasn't there, and I was at a complete loss as to what to do, so Mac offered." Harm thought back over the past month. Surely, he had asked Renee to hold Amelia at some point. "Have I really never asked you to hold her?" Renee shook her head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that as some kind of snub. Everyone else has always insisted on it. I didn't think it was something I needed to ask."

"You've never asked, or even cared if I connected with her, because you know that I'm never going to be her mother. I don't want to be, and you don't want me to be. The fact is, you already know who you want in that role." She forced a smile, and headed over to the hook to pick up her purse. "I'm going to give you some advice before I go. Consider it my parting gift." He took a deep breath, and she let one out. "You can't casually date anymore. Especially not as your daughter gets older. She's already attached to Mac. A blind narcissist can see that. But if you date someone who is willing to mother her, and she ends up getting attached, it's going to hurt her when you end it for whatever reason. She's lost too many people already, and you can't do that to her. Maybe I'm wrong, and you don't have feelings for Mac. But I don't think I am. I think you do, and you're just wasting time hoping for something to happen with one of your careers that makes a relationship feasible." She walked up to him, and gave him a lingering kiss on his cheek. "If you have feelings for her, you need to do something about them. Otherwise you're being unfair to her, Amelia, the women you date, and ultimately yourself."

* * *

Harm paced around the apartment, thinking about Renee's parting words. He needed to see Mac. He needed to talk to her. He glanced at the clock on the stove and frowned. It was almost 9:00, and Amelia was already asleep. He couldn't very well wake his sleeping child up to go across town because he was emotionally conflicted.

He picked up the phone and dialed Mac's cellphone number. It rang three times before she answered it, and he nearly dropped the receiver when she answered. "Hey, it's me. Is this a bad time?"

"Perfect timing." He could hear the car door open. "I literally just left the gym. What's up?"

"Is there anyway you could come over? I really need to talk. I'd come to you, but Amelia is asleep."

Mac paused, and then sighed. "Sure. I haven't had dinner yet, and I'm starving, so I'm going to grab some dinner and then I'll be over."

"See you soon. Drive safe." He hung up the phone, and sat down to wait.

Fifteen minutes later there was a knock on his door. He opened it quickly, and greeted her with a smile. "That was fast."

She shrugged, and sat the bag of Mexican food on the counter. "You sounded frazzled. What's going on?"

Harm watched as she walked over to one of his cabinets and reached for a plate, and then grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge. He waited until she was on a bar stool unwrapping a taco before he started talking. "Renee and I broke up." The taco froze in mid-air, and he watched as she put it back on the plate.

"I'm sorry." She opened and closed her mouth a few times. "I don't really know what to say."

He gestured at her plate. "Eat your dinner. I'll tell you about our conversation." And he started to talk. He told her about most of his conversation with Renee, leaving out the parts about her, figuring he'd save all that for last. He watched her ball up the second taco wrapper and he took a breath. "She's convinced we have feelings for one another. And that we're both just biding our time until something happens with our careers to make a relationship a possibility. She told me I shouldn't casually date anymore, because I run the risk of Amelia getting attached, and hurt when the relationship inevitably fails."

"Jesus, Harm." Mac stood up and walked over to the sink. She quickly washed her hands and dried them on his dish towel. "Well, what do you think? Is that what we're doing?"

He shrugged. "I don't know anymore. I have six years before I can retire. You have eight. Is that really what we're waiting on?"

She shrugged this time. "There are options other than retirement if we really wanted to be together."

Australia popped into his head for what felt like the millionth time. He crossed the kitchen and stood in front of her. "Do we want to be together?" His eyes fell to her lips, and he was lowering his head, when she stopped him with a gentle hand on his chest. He recoiled as if he had been doused with cold water and stepped back. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." She smiled wistfully. "I pretty much propositioned you not too long ago in Australia." She placed a hand on each of his shoulders and looked at him. "Renee got to give you some advice. Now it's my turn."

He took a deep breath and nodded. "Now is not the time for you to start anything with anyone. Your life has been chaotic over the past year. I mean, think about it. In the past 13-14 months, you left JAG – and Jordan. You flew for six months. You came back to JAG. You met Renee. You found out about Amelia. You and Renee broke up. That's a lot to process."

"What's your advice?"

She smiled and crossed her arms oved her chest. "Take some time for yourself. Spend time with friends. Leave romance out of your relationships for a little while. I think that'll be really healthy for you in the long run."

"Will things be weird between us?" His eyes fell to her lips again. Instinctively her tongue darted out to moisten them, and they both blushed.

Mac shook her head. "No. We're good friends. That hasn't changed." She took a deep breath, and placed her hand on his chest. "It won't change. I promise." She smiled, and let her hand fall to her side. "I should probably go." He didn't want her to leave, but knew she was right. He walked with her to the door, and opened it for her. Before she could leave, she turned to face him. "If we're ever both ready at the same time, the military won't keep us apart. We'll figure out how to work around it."

**End Part 6**

**Notes: **It's officially July 4th in my part of the States, so to celebrate I thought I'd go ahead and give Harm his independence from Renee. =)


	7. Chapter 7

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Seven**

"Grams? We're here." Harm walked into his grandmother's house, Amelia's car seat in one hand, a large suitcase with the diaper bag balancing on top of it in the other. There was no sign of his grandmother, so he called for her again. He heard the back door open and shut, and called for her again. "Grams?"

Sarah Rabb hurried from the kitchen and all but ran over to him. She sat the basket of freshly picked produce on the floor and immediately lowered herself to look at Amelia. "Oh, my goodness, she's perfect."

Harm sat the seat on the floor and knelt to work the straps. He undid them, and lifted her out and handed her to his grandmother. "Grams, this is Amelia."

She stood, and paced with her great-grandchild in her arms. "I cannot believe I'm holding my great-granddaughter. I never, ever thought this moment would come." She studied the baby and looked up at Harm. "She has your eyes."

He grinned at his grandmother. "Your eyes too." Amelia started to fuss, and he reached for her. "She probably needs to be changed. Want me to take her?"

"Absolutely not. Go get settled. I'll take care of her." Sarah grabbed the diaper bag and disappeared into her own bedroom.

Harm grinned and lugged the suitcase upstairs to his bedroom. He noticed the door next door to his was open. He peaked in, and then took a deep breath. His grandmother was wonderful. The room had been painted pale yellow, there were floor length white curtains on each window, a white overstuffed chair in a corner, a dark dresser that seemed familiar, and a crib he recognized from old photos. He ran his hand over the soft wood of the dresser and smiled. It was a beautiful mid-century piece, and he recognized it as one that had been in his grandmother's attic. He heard footsteps behind him and turned to smile at her. "I can't believe you still have this crib. And I can't believe you did all of this. I don't even want to know how you managed to get this furniture from the attic."

"You know I have a gentleman friend. He helped me bring it downstairs." Harm groaned and she grinned. "Of course, I still have it. You and your father both used this crib. I've always been hopeful there would be more Rabbs in the future that would be able to use it."

"I still need to meet this 'gentleman friend.' You've been talking about him for years."

She smiled broadly. "Well, you've been talking about Sarah MacKenzie for years, and I've yet to meet her." Harm rolled her eyes, and she patted his arm. "You can meet Jacob when I trust that you're mature enough not to interrogate him."

* * *

Harm washed the dinner dishes while his grandmother read to the baby, and he smiled as he walked into the living room. "Thank you again for dinner, Grams. It was wonderful. I had almost forgotten how good homegrown vegetables are."

"Well you'll have to take some back with you. And some for your friends too. Those tomatoes are coming in faster than I can harvest them."

"I'll take you up on that." He gestured at Amelia. "It's past her bedtime. Want me to take her upstairs?"

Sarah shook her head. "I'd like to do it. It's been 36 years since I've had a baby in the house to take care of." She stood, and hoisted Amelia onto her hip. "And when I get back, we're going to have a very long talk." He groaned, and she started up the stairs.

He flopped back onto the couch and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket. He scrolled through his contact list and stared Mac's name. He had the overwhelming urge to talk to her. It had been three weeks since his breakup with Renee, and he had taken Mac's advice. For the most part. He had spent time with Amelia, spent time with friends, and left romance out of his relationships. Or at least he had tried to, but the time he had been spending with Mac was making that difficult. They'd had dinner together several times, and they had taken Amelia to the Smithsonian Zoo on one abnormally cool August day, where an elderly woman had told him that he had a beautiful family. His finger hovered over the call button, and before he could talk himself out of it, he pressed it. The phone rang three times and he was about to hang up when someone answered.

"Sarah MacKenzie's phone."

Harm frowned and sat up straighter. "Is Mac there?"

"Harm? It's Maddie. Mac's in the bathroom, so I answered her phone. She should be back in just a minute."

He relaxed a little bit. "Hey Maddie. Just tell her I called, and I'll talk to her later."

"No problem. Have a goodnight, Harm."

"You too." He hung up the phone and slipped it back in his pocket. He heard the stairs squeak and leaned back into the cushions." His grandmother appeared a moment later and smiled.

"She's such a sweetheart, Harmon. She's just perfect." Sarah sat next to him on the couch, and picked up a pillow to hold in her lap. "Don't get too cocky though. She'll probably be hell on wheels as a teenager."

He groaned and dropped his head back. "I can't even think about her becoming a teenager without feeling anxious."

She smiled and picked up the bottle of water she had left on the end table. "That's smart. Considering when you were a teenager and you were at your worst, Trish always said she hoped you'd have one just like you." She picked at the label on the bottle and looked at him. "So, tell me about her mother."

Harm blushed and shrugged. "There isn't a lot to tell. She and I were together for only one night. Her name was Claudia, and she died in a car accident a few months ago." His grandmother was studying him, and he blushed again. "We used protection, Grams. I'm not that reckless." She raised an eyebrow, which he ignored, and proceeded to tell her about Claire, and Claire's lack of any other family.

"Have you seen Claire since you took custody of Amelia?"

He shook his head. "No. We've emailed and talked on the phone a few times. She claims she's been busy with summer school, but I think she just wants a little distance right now. I'm letting her adjust to this weird new family at her own pace."

* * *

Mac returned from the bathroom, and smoothed down her dress before sliding back into the booth. Maddie pushed her phone across the table. "It rang, so I answered it. Harm called."

Mac's eyes widened and she grabbed for the phone. Harm and Amelia were in Pennsylvania this weekend with his grandmother, and she immediately started picturing car accidents. "Is everything okay?"

She flipped open the phone to call him back, and Maddie gently placed a hand on hers and stilled her movements. "He sounded fine. He asked me to tell you that he called, and that he'd talk to you later." Mac visibly relaxed, and Maddie leaned back. "I think I should set you up with my friend William. You'd like him. He works at the National Archives, he's incredibly good looking, he's well read and articulate. I think you'd hit it off."

Mac shook her head. "I'm not looking to be fixed up, Maddie. I'm fine on my own."

"But you're not on your own. Your biding your time while waiting for Harm to pull his head out of his ass." Mac winced and opened her mouth, but Maddie continued. "You've been in love with him for years. If it hasn't happened by now, it's probably not going to, and you're throwing away your best years waiting for him to be ready for this."

Mac stabbed at a wedge of lemon with her straw and sighed. "I think he is ready though. He and his girlfriend broke up a few weeks ago, and he tried to kiss me. But even before that, we've been having these moments lately. I can't explain it. I just feel like things between us are shifting."

Maddie frowned. "Is this because of his daughter?"

Mac shrugged and looked at her friend. "That's what I'm afraid of. I've wanted him for years. But what if he wants me because he doesn't want to be a single father? I told him to take some time."

"So, you're just going to sit around and wait for him? For how long?"

She popped a piece of bread into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully. "As long as it takes, Maddie. He's the one. I know it. I feel it."

Maddie reached for the phone and flipped it open. She added William's number to her contact list. "Well, his number is in there if you change your mind."

* * *

He was brushing his teeth in his ensuite bathroom when he heard his cellphone vibrating around on the nightstand. He quickly finished and hurried to the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey, it's me."

Mac. She sounded relaxed and happy, and he'd do anything to hear her sound like that more often. He tugged down the quilt and climbed into bed. "Hey. I'm guessing Maddie told you I called?"

"She did." He could hear rustling in the background and imagined she was settling into her own bed. "Is everything okay?"

He thought about that question for a moment, and decided to be honest with her. "Everything is good. I just really wanted to talk to you." He had never been much of a phone guy - in high school it had always driven his girlfriends crazy. Tonight, it had startled him how badly he had wanted to talk to her. "My grandmother mentioned wanting to meet you. She's wanted that for years. You should come up here with me some time."

Mac smiled, and slid into bed. "One of these days you'll have to invite me. I've heard so much about her, I'd love the chance to meet her. How's Amelia?"

He could hear the smile in her voice and he felt like his insides were doing little somersaults. "She's perfect. My grandmother is completely smitten with her."

"She has that effect on people."

"Why do you think that is?" He paused, and tried to phrase the question so it made more sense. "I mean… I guess I don't know what I'm trying to say."

Mac was quiet for a long moment, and then she finally sighed. "Well, she has your eyes. That's probably part of it. But I really can't explain it. I just felt this overwhelming pull towards her. I have since that day at Bud and Harriet's." She paused again, trying to figure out how to word what she wanted to say. "I think part of it is that she doesn't have a mother. I suppose I identify with that. I know she'll have a wonderful life, even without a mother, but I think it just makes me want to be there for her."

"Amelia and I are both really lucky to have you."

She was taken aback by his statement. By this whole conversation, really. It was unlike him. But what she had told Maddie had been true – things were changing between them. "Mac? You there?" She shook her head to clear her thoughts.

"Sorry, what were you saying?"

He grinned. It wasn't often he was able to get her flustered. "I was asking how your evening with Maddie was."

Mac sighed and twisted her ring around her finger. "It was good." She reclined completely and told him about their dinner, and then listened to him tell her all about their evening with his grandmother, and what they had planned the next day. She felt herself starting to doze. His voice was so damned warm & comforting.

"Mac?"

She jolted awake and blushed. "Sorry. I think I started falling asleep."

He snorted. "Farm life isn't that boring."

She smiled and rolled over onto her side. "Your voice is relaxing. And my bed is really comfortable."

He felt a warming in his chest, and swallowed. "Get some sleep. I'll talk to you when I get home. Goodnight, Mac."

"Night, Harm."

* * *

Harm parked the car in front of Mac's apartment, and got out and went around to the backseat. He removed the car-seat from the base, and grabbed the large shopping bag of produce his grandmother had sent with him. He carefully made his way to her door, and knocked lightly with the side of his foot.

Mac opened the door a moment later, and smiled broadly at her visitors. "This is a nice surprise. Come on in." She reached for the bag, and then stepped back so he could enter. She peered into the bag and then up at him. "What's all this?"

He sat Amelia's seat on the dining table and rubbed his palms on his jeans. "Vegetables from my grandmothers garden. She has too much and told me to bring some back with me to share with my friends." He smiled as he watched her pull out a few tomatoes, some jalapenos, and a few cucumbers. She may be a junk food fiend, but he also knew one of her favorite snacks was cucumbers dipped in ranch dressing, and she loved putting tomato slices on her grilled cheese sandwiches. She sat the produce on her kitchen counter, and then walked over to Amelia. She unstrapped her from her harness and picked her up.

"Please tell her thank you for me." She made a face at Amelia, and smiled when she laughed. "How did she like the farm?"

Harm grinned, and sat down in one of the chairs. "She loved it. She was fascinated by the animals. My grandmother had fixed her up a room of her own, with the crib my dad and I both used. I can't wait for her to make memories there like I did."

She smiled, and sat down at the table with him. She looked down at Amelia and ran a hand over her blonde curls. She's a lucky little girl, Harm. Which do you think she'll prefer? The beach house in San Diego or the farm house in Pennsylvania?"

He shrugged, and reached out to stroke his daughter's soft cheek. "I always preferred the farm house, but I'm also not bitter or hostile toward my mom and Frank anymore, so we'll see. I want her to have plenty of time at both." Amelia held out her pudgy arms to him, and he reached for her. She babbled something that sounded remarkably like dada, and he glanced up at Mac, his eyes wide. "Did she just say what I think she said?"

"It's what I heard." She watched him study his daughter, and smiled. "Was that her first word?"

He nodded. "There's been plenty of incoherent babbling, but that's the first word I've been able to understand." He held her up as if she were standing; his hands under her arms, and her tiny feet on his thighs.

Mac watched him talking to Amelia, hoping he'd hear the word again. And she knew she'd never use that phone number that Maddie had put in her phone. She'd wait for him as long as she needed to.

**End Part 7**

Spoiler alert: Mac's not going to have to wait very long…


	8. Chapter 8

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Eight**

Harm dialed Mac's number, and watched Amelia curiously while the phone rang. She was seven months old, and he had a feeling she would start crawling any minute.

"Hello?"

Mac's voice startled him, and he shook his head to clear the fog. "Hey, it's me. Any plans today?"

"Oh yes." He heard the teasing note in her voice and smiled as she continued. "The grocery store is having a great sale on Oreos. So, I figured I'd go stock up. And then I either have to do laundry, or go to the mall and buy new clothes. I haven't decided which yet."

He laughed and leaned against the crib. "How about you start a load of laundry and then come spend the day with us." He watched Amelia studying a toy on the other side of the room and grinned. The look of determination on her face was jarring. "I was going to take Amelia to the park for a little while. I'll even stop at the store on our way and buy you some cookies."

She grinned and glanced at the piles of laundry covering her bed. "I think that's an offer I can't refuse. I'll be over soon." She clicked off the phone and dropped it on her bed, before disappearing into the closet to find something that was clean and appropriate.

Twenty minutes later, she was dressed in a sleeveless cotton maxi dress, that was softer than anything other than pajama pants had any right to be, and a pair of flat sandals. She threw one of the laundry piles into the washing machine, and threw one of the other piles in the hamper to take with her. She figured she would commandeer the machine at his apartment and run a load while they were at the park. The drive to Harm's took longer than usual, thanks to summer tourists, but she finally made it, and smoothed out her dress before grabbing her purse and laundry basket.

He opened the door and smiled. He reached for the laundry basket and nearly salivated at the sight of her. Her toned arms were bare, the dress she wore was fitted at the top, and the v-neckline dipped low. "You look really nice for a day at the park."

She gestured at the laundry basket. "That's one of four that need to be washed. It was either a dress or a uniform." He moved out of the way so she could enter the apartment. "Besides, it may be a dress, but it feels like I'm wearing pajamas." She heard babbling coming from the bedrooms and grinned. "Where's Amelia?"

"I put her in her crib while I came to open the door, and I don't think she's too happy about it. I'm obviously not 100% sure about any of this, but I have the feeling she's going to start crawling soon. Based on the book she's at the right age, and the way she looks at things that are out of her grasp is unsettling."

Mac smiled and placed her hand on his arm. "One day she's crawling, and next thing you know she'll be all grown, and you'll be a grandpa." He clutched his hands to his heart in mock horror, and she laughed. "Do you mind if I run a load here?" She gestured to the basket.

"Help yourself." He picked up the basket, and she followed him to the small laundry area. "I'll be in Amelia's room when you're ready." She started the load of laundry, and then popped her head in the bedroom. Harm was sitting on the floor, with Amelia between his legs. He had a book open on the floor in front of her, and was pointing out the different colored shapes. He felt her eyes on him and looked up. "Come on in." He watched as she adjusted her dress, and joined them on the floor. Amelia stretched out her arms, and Mac gladly picked her up. She knew what Renee had told Harm when they broke up was true - Amelia was attached to her. But she was just as attached to Amelia. She lowered her head to breathe in the child's sweet scent, and looked up to see Harm watching them. She could tell he was about to speak, and she swallowed, nervous to hear what he had to say. The phone rang at the exact moment he opened his mouth. He got up to answer it, and she let out a quiet sigh of relief.

* * *

Harm up the phone, and muttered under his breath. "Shit." So much for a beautiful Saturday with Mac and Amelia. He stepped back into the bedroom, and she looked up and frowned.

"What's wrong?"

"That was Chegwidden. I'm on call this weekend, and I just got called in. I have to go to Norfolk. There was some kind of mishap on the Lincoln. I'm not sure of the specifics, but he told me it should only take a day or two to sort out."

She winced. "That stinks."

He nodded. "I'm sorry I brought you all the way out here for nothing."

Mac shook her head, and gestured at the baby. "It's not a problem. Want me to watch her while you're gone?"

His eyes widened. "Mac, I can't ask you to do that. I'll call Lily. This is the kind of thing she knew could happen when I hired her."

"Well, you didn't ask. I volunteered. And I know Lily is will take her on overnights. But there are going to be a lot more of these situations in the future, and since I don't have to go with you, I'm happy to keep her." A thought popped into her head, and she bit her lip. "Unless…" She took a deep breath. "Harm, if you'd rather Lily keep her, just say so."

He shook his head. "No! It's not that at all. I trust you with my life, and with hers. I just feel like I would be taking advantage of you."

She shrugged, and took another deep breath. "Well, it's up to you. I'm happy to keep her while you're gone."

He smiled and nodded. "Okay then." He knelt beside her and kissed her cheek. "Thank you." He stood back up and walked to the door. "I'm going to get a bag packed. Do you need to go back to your place for anything before I go?"

"I did run a load of laundry before I left that I need to go check on. What if you take my car, and leave me yours? That way I can run home later, and we don't have to move the car seat around." He nodded and crossed the hall to his own bedroom to pack.

He packed quickly, and did a quick check of his bedroom to make sure she wouldn't find anything too embarrassing, and then reluctantly carried his bag into the living room. He went back to Amelia's room, and leaned against the door frame. Mac had moved away from her, and was watching with her head cocked to the side. "She's absolutely going to crawl while I'm gone, isn't she?"

Mac turned to face him and shrugged. "Do you have a video camera?"

He shook his head. "I should though, shouldn't I?" She nodded, and he made a mental note to buy one as soon as he was home. "Well, I guess I should go." He moved to pick up his daughter, and Mac stood. He placed a lingering kiss on Amelia's forehead, and then handed her to Mac. He took one of her tiny hands, and smiled as her tiny hand wrapped around one of his fingers. "Try not to do anything new until I get back, okay?" She looked up at him with his eyes, and he leaned in to kiss her again. "Thank you, Mac. I really, really appreciate you doing this." The three of them walked to the door, and Harm grabbed his bag and forced himself out of the apartment.

Once he was out of sight, Mac shut the door and immediately opened the coat closet and pulled out the stroller. She fastened Amelia in, grabbed her purse and smiled at the baby. "Let's go buy your daddy a video camera."

* * *

Amelia was asleep, Mac was folding her laundry, and there was a movie on Harm's new TV that she wasn't paying any attention to. It had been a really good day. They had gone to her apartment first, where she had packed an overnight bag, and moved her clothes to the dryer. Then they stopped by the grocery store, where she picked up some snacks to bring back to Harm's. His fridge was full of celery and hummus. There wasn't a cookie or anything fried in the whole place. And their final stop was at Best Buy, where she picked up a mini video camera. She had a feeling he was right, and Amelia would crawl soon. And she'd be damned if he missed it.

The phone rang, and Mac muted the TV before answering. "Hello?"

"Hey there."

The sound of his voice did something to her insides, and she smiled. "Hey. How's the case?"

He groaned. "A complete waste of my weekend. How's Amelia?"

She nudged the stacks of laundry out of the way and collapsed onto the couch. "She's absolutely perfect. We read every single book, we played, she ate well, she loved her bath, and she fell asleep in about five seconds."

Harm beamed with pride. "I think God gave me such a sweet-tempered child because he knows I don't have a clue as to what I'm doing."

Mac laughed, and pulled her legs up. "Well, I think you're doing something right."

"I hate I didn't get to spend the day with the two of you. I was really looking forward to it."

"Oh yeah?" Her heart was beating faster. She knew where they were headed. She had felt it over the past two months. Was this it, though? Was this the moment she had been hoping for before he left, and that night in Australia?

"Yeah." His voice was low. "Maybe we can try again next weekend?"

"I'd like that."

They were both quiet for a long moment. Finally, he cleared his throat. "So, did she crawl yet?"

"Not yet. I went and bought a video camera though. I'll make sure that you don't miss it if it happens." The other end of the phone was quiet, and she frowned, hoping they hadn't been disconnected. "Harm?"

"You did that for me?"

"I did."

He took a deep breath. "Thank you. Seriously, Mac. Thank you. And not just for buying a camera, and keeping her this weekend. You've been amazing ever since that first day Claire came to the office. I don't think I'd be able to do this without you."

It was her turn to go quiet. Finally, she cleared her throat. "I have no doubt that you could, but you don't have to."

* * *

It was after 9:00 the next night when he had finally wrapped up everything in Norfolk, and was able to call it a day. He immediately decided he wanted to be home, and went to the VOQ and checked out. There wasn't much traffic at that hour on a Sunday night, and he made it home in record time. He was quiet as he entered his apartment - it was after midnight. He dropped his bag by the door and went to Amelia's room first. He bent over the crib to give her a kiss, and then left the room. As quietly as possible, he opened the door to his room, and found Mac in his bed. He had known that's where she would be, since his couch wasn't comfortable enough for more than a quick nap, but seeing her dark skin peeking out from underneath the white duvet did something to him. He knelt by her side of the bed and took a deep breath before tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. He ran his hand over her arm, and softly said her name.

She stirred, and slowly opened her eyes. She didn't jump or react to his appearance at the side of the bed, and just offered him a sleepy smile. "It's after midnight. What are you doing here?"

His eyes widened and he glanced at his watch. "How do you do that?" She smiled again and shifted. She reached for the lamp on the bedside table and turned it on. "I have the day off tomorrow since I worked all weekend, and didn't want to spend part of that driving."

"Makes sense." She looked awkwardly around the bed. "Should I get up? I can spend the rest of the night on the couch."

"No, don't do that. I only woke you up to see if you'd mind if I slept here too. I didn't want to do it without asking and make you uncomfortable in the morning." He paused and studied the king-sized bed. "If it's too weird for you, I'll sleep on the couch."

She shook her head. "I don't mind. That little cove we slept in when you took me flying put us much closer together than this."

"Okay then." He smiled and stood. "Go back to sleep. I'm going to take a shower."

" 'kay." She instantly lowered herself and curled back into the position she was in when he woke her up. He walked to the bathroom door, and turned back to watch her for a moment before stepping inside and shutting the door behind him.

* * *

Waking up in Harm's bed had been jarring enough the first morning of this sleepover, when she had woken up alone. Waking up in Harm's bed next to the man himself was something else all-together. For starters, his scent was intoxicating. It was pleasantly familiar and sexy, and she ached to curl up closer to him and bury her face in the crook of his neck. And apparently, he was a stomach sleeper. She liked to sleep with the bedding pulled up to her chest, on his side of the bed the duvet and sheet were gathered at his waist, leaving his perfectly muscled back bare to her.

Babbling coming from the baby monitor pulled her attention away from him, and she reached over to grab it from the nightstand and turn the volume down. She slid out of bed and walked quietly out of the room and across the hall. Amelia was wide awake when Mac lifted her out of the crib and held her close before changing her diaper and then putting her in a fresh outfit for the day. She sat her back in the crib before going to prepare her bottle. "I'll be right back." She whispered. And even though the knew it was impossible, the expression in her enormous eyes made Mac think she understood every word.

A few minutes later she returned to Amelia's room with the bottle and a bib, and they settled into the comfortable arm chair by the window. "I've really enjoyed hanging out with you the past couple of days." Mac knew her voice was soft and wistful.

"Hey."

She looked toward the door and smiled. "Hey. Did we wake you? I silenced the monitor hoping you'd be able to sleep."

He shook his head and continued to stand in the doorway and watch them, not wanting to ruin the scene. They were both bathed in the bright morning light, and he was hit with an overwhelming sense of longing. "You didn't wake me. I guess my body is just used to waking up with her at this time."

"You should try and get a little more sleep. I can wake you up before I leave for work."

He shook his head again. "I'm not that tired."

She tried to put all of her focus on Amelia, but couldn't ignore the feeling of his eyes on her. She looked up and was floored by the intensity in them. "I'm almost afraid to ask what's on your mind."

"I'm…" He paused, searching for the correct words. "Have you ever been completely overwhelmed by how perfect something is?"

She was glad she was in a chair, because her legs suddenly felt like jelly. "Harm, you don't need to do this. To say this." She looked at the baby in her arms, and then back at him. "I'll always be here for Amelia, and I'll always help you with anything I can. We don't need to change our relationship."

"I want to change our relationship." He walked into the room and knelt in front of them. "This has nothing to do with Amelia. She just made me realize what's always been there." He placed his hands on her thighs and looked up at her. "Mac, I look at you, and I don't think 'oh, great. Here's a woman willing to be a mother to my daughter.' I look at you and I'm floored by how amazing you are. I look at you and I'm overwhelmed by how attracted I am to you." He shook his head and moved his fingers over the soft material of her pale blue pajama bottoms. "I look at you and I'm so angry at myself for setting our deal five years into the future." He paused, overcome with emotion. "I should have said two years. Or one year. Or that very moment." He reached up and wiped a tear off of her cheek. "I'm ready, Mac. I'm so ready for this thing that's been building over the past four years."

"Are you sure?" She looked down at Amelia, and then back at him. "We both have to be completely sure. It's not just about the two of us anymore."

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life." He pulled himself up and took Amelia from Mac's arms. He placed a kiss on her forehead, and sat her in the crib. He turned back to Mac and placed a hand on her cheek. He stepped closer and brushed his lips against hers.

**End Part 8**


	9. Chapter 9

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Nine**

Harm pulled her close and deepened the kiss. One arm tightened around her waist, and his other hand remained on her face. His thumb continued to stroke her cheek, and he moaned as she melted into him. He finally broke away from her, and couldn't help the grin that covered his face. "Hi."

Her smile was just as wide, and she looped her arms around his neck. "Hey." She heard babbling coming from the crib and gestured to Amelia with her head. "I think someone is feeling left out." He gave her a quick kiss and then pulled back and went to Amelia. He lifted her out of the crib, and brushed her hair off of her face.

Mac stood to the side and watched them for a moment, completely smitten with both of them. "I hate to do this, but I need to get ready for work."

He looked at his watch and frowned. "Do you need to go back to your place?"

She shook her head. "No, I grabbed a uniform when I was there the other night." She smiled at Amelia, and then back at Harm. "I'm going to use your shower. I won't be long."

Mac emerged from the bathroom less than 30 minutes later. He looked up as her heels tapped across the floor and smiled. "You weren't kidding. I've never known a woman who could get ready that quickly."

"Yeah, well, you've never been with a Marine."

Harm felt his face heat. "You're right. I've never been with a Marine. So, about that Energizer Bunny joke I tried to tell you a few years ago…"

She swatted at him and felt the color rise in her own cheeks. "Maybe one day you'll find out of that punch line is accurate."

He grabbed the hand that swatted at him and tugged her close. "How about tonight?"

His voice was low, and she put her other hand on the counter to keep from swaying. "Are you sure we're ready for that step?" She glanced at Amelia, who was sitting in her high chair, and back at Harm. "What about her? Is it appropriate while she's here?"

He cocked his head to the side. "She's seven months old. I don't think she'll care what we do once she's in bed." He placed her hand over his heart, and covered it with his. "Come over after work. Have dinner with us, and once Amelia's in bed we'll play everything else by ear."

* * *

The day went by at a snail's pace, and it had seemed like an eternity before she was back at his apartment. Beginning a new relationship with the man of her dreams two hours before she had to be at work had to be one of the worst ideas she had ever had – and considering her teenage marriage and her affair with her commanding officer, that was saying something. Mac knocked lightly on the door, and smiled when he pulled it open. He dropped his head to give her a kiss, before stepping out of the way so she could come in. Once the door was closed, he kissed her again, and then took her hat and her briefcase from her.

"You're earlier than I thought you'd be. I haven't even started dinner yet."

She blushed and bit her lower lip. "I was going to go home and change, but then I remembered that most of my laundry is over here."

He grinned and gestured to his bedroom. "All three baskets are in my room."

She started towards the room, and stopped. "If you have things you need to do, I can take those home and come back a little bit later."

Harm walked up to her and put his hands on her hips. "No, stay. Please." He felt guilty; he hadn't meant to make her self-conscious. "I'm really happy you're here." She didn't look completely convinced but she smiled, and he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

Mac shifted away from him, and the hand still on her hip fell to his side. "I'm going to go change. I'll be right back." She went to his bedroom, and shut the door behind her. She sat on the edge of his bed and took a few deep breaths. She took her time taking off her uniform, and dug through the baskets looking for her favorite jeans and a soft t-shirt. She slipped on the sandals she had worn over on Saturday, and finally left the bedroom.

He looked up from his cutting board and his eyes traveled down her figure. She looked damn good in jeans – especially worn in, faded, snug ones. He smiled as she went to Amelia and picked her up, and then took one of the barstools. "What's for dinner?"

He finished chopping a bell pepper into large chunks, and then slid the pieces into a bowl. "Grilled Greek chicken skewers & an arugula and goat cheese salad." She cocked her head to the side, and he grinned. "There are some really nice grills at the pool area."

Mac lit up, and looked at Amelia. "Has she been in the pool yet?"

"No, not yet. I'm honestly a little terrified of that."

"You should take her. She loves her bath time so much I think she'd really enjoy it." Mac tickled Amelia's foot, and smiled when she laughed. "You'll be holding her the entire time."

He nodded. "I know." He looked her over and smiled. "By any chance is there a bathing suit in any of those laundry baskets?"

She shook her head. "No, but I do have one in my gym bag."

* * *

Getting everything they needed to the pool area had been an ordeal. Harm managed the tray of skewers, the salad bowl, plates and utensils. Mac carried a duffel bag with beach towels, a few diaper bag essentials in one hand, and Amelia in her carrier in the other. She helped him get everything to the grill, and then went to her car to get her swimsuit. She ducked into one of the outdoor bathrooms, and changed into the conservative, one-piece black suit she used for swimming laps at the gym.

She looked longingly at the water, and then back at him. "Do you mind if I go jump in before dinner? It's been a long day."

"No, go ahead. We'll be right here." He watched as she walked over to the deep in, and gracefully dove into the water. He loved watching her move, no matter if she was running, kickboxing, or swimming. Her moves were well-practiced and flawless. He shook his head to clear his thoughts, and turned to the grill to check on the chicken.

"That smells really good."

He turned and nearly salivated. Her golden skin glistened, her hair was slicked back, and her smile was radiant. "You look really good."

Mac blushed and reached for a towel. She wrapped it loosely around her waist, and then sat down. "Thank you." She watched as he pulled the chicken off the heat, and put them on each of their plates alongside the salad.

* * *

She pushed the plate to the side and leaned back in her chair. "Thanks for dinner, Harm. It was wonderful."

"You're welcome." He stood, and eyed the pool. "Let's get this over with."

She frowned. "That's a charming attitude."

He sighed. "I know, I'm sorry. I know one of us will be holding her the whole time, but it's still scary." He pulled off his t-shirt, and looked at his daughter in the ruffled pink suit his mother had bought. "Is the water warm?"

"Yes, it feels wonderful. Come on." She walked to the edge of the pool and slid in. She smiled as Harm walked to the steps, and carefully entered the pool, one arm around Amelia, and one hand on the railing. He walked over to her, holding Amelia so high she was barely touching the water. She extended her arms. "Let me hold her." Harm reluctantly passed the baby over, and anxiously watched the two of them. Amelia slapped at the water, and splashed herself. Her eyes widened, but surprised Harm by laughing instead of crying. Mac laughed, and moved her around in the water. She looked up at Harm and grinned. "When I was in college, I spent my summers life-guarding at a country club pool. And the first thing I learned was that you need to be relaxed if the baby is going to be relaxed." Amelia slapped at the water again, splashing herself and Mac this time.

Harm swam up to them, relaxing a little. Mac was right, she was enjoying this. He wrapped an arm around Mac, and leaned in to kiss her. "Thank you for talking me into this. You were right."

She smiled at him, and looked at Amelia. "You're welcome. And you should sign her up for a swim class. I know my gym starts them for babies at six months." Amelia looked at Harm and babbled something nonsensical, and Mac smiled at her. "Would you like to go to your daddy?"

"Dada."

Mac laughed and extended her to Harm. "I think that's a yes." Harm took her, and Mac reclined and floated away on her back.

* * *

She changed out of the wet bathing suit and draped it over the shower rod. She put her jeans and t-shirt back on, and padded barefoot to the living room. She sat on the sofa, anxiously waiting for Harm to finish putting Amelia to bed. She wasn't stupid – it was obvious where the night was headed. The looks he had given her at the pool were positively lustful, and while she wanted to, she was also nervous.

Harm came into the room and smiled. "She is out. We didn't even finish a whole book." He sat next to her on the couch, and leaned in to kiss her.

"I think I read somewhere once that swimming really tires babies out." She grinned. "Now you'll know what to do if you ever can't get her to sleep."

He placed gentle kisses on her jaw, and then her neck. "Does it tire adults out too? Or are you good for a while?"

Her hand moved to his thigh, and she moved her fingers over the soft denim. "I'm not tired."

He pulled back slightly and smiled. "Want to go to the bedroom?"

She bit her lower lip and moved her hand to his chest. "I'm not sure if that's such a good idea." He studied her, and she took a deep breath. "I'm scared to rush things."

He cupped her cheek and leaned in for another kiss. "I want you. I'm not going to pretend that I don't. But if you're not ready, that's fine."

She took another deep breath. "I'm ready, but I'm worried you'll lose respect for me if I immediately go to bed with you."

"No." His voice was firm. "No. There is nothing you could do that would make me lose respect for you." Her eyes were huge as they searched his face, and he was instantly angry at every man who had ever used her, or made her feel cheap. "I meant everything I said to you this morning – I think you're completely amazing."

"And if we go to bed together, you'll still think I'm amazing in the morning?"

"Of course, I will." He offered her a lascivious grin. "I'll probably think you're even more amazing."

Mac laughed, and stood. She extended her hand to him, which he eagerly took. "Let's go to your bedroom."

* * *

_**Four Weeks Later**_

Harm poked his head in Mac's office and grinned. "Are you busy?"

She looked up from her computer an shook her head. "Nope. Just finishing up a few things before the Admiral's meeting. Why do you look so cheerful before 8:00am on a Monday morning?"

He strolled into her office, and took one of the chairs in front of her desk. "Just thinking about the weekend. It was a pretty good one."

She smiled, a pretty blush coloring her cheeks. She had spent nearly the whole weekend with him & Amelia, and it had been wonderful. They typically saved their sleepovers for weekends, and waking up next to him was becoming one of her favorite things. "Yeah, it was a good one. We'll have to do it again next weekend."

"Absolutely."

His smile made her knees wobbly, and she wondered how long that would last. When they were old and gray, would he still be able to make her knees weak? God, she hoped so. "Was Amelia feeling any better this morning?"

He groaned. "I don't know who teething is harder on, me or her."

She gave him a sympathetic smile. "Well, if you ever want an extra set of hands for her to gnaw on, you know where to find me."

"I know. And I appreciate it." He glanced at his watch. "Want to head to the conference room with me?"

"Sure. Just let me shut this down." She saved the file she had been working on, and logged off of the computer. She stood and grabbed a notepad and pen before walking over to him. They made their way to the conference room together, and found everyone else already there. He casually shrugged and took a seat on one side of the Admiral's chair, and she took the other.

Admiral Chegwidden studied them both, and then looked at his watch. "Nice of you both to join us." He bit back a grin at the chagrined expression on Mac's face and looked down at his legal pad. "Well, before we get on with the business of the day, I have an announcement to make. With the CNO and commandant's blessing, SECNAV is standing up a prototype Joint Legal Service Center. Navy and Marine lawyers together in the field under one command. There was a short list put together of 0-5's to lead it, one of our own has been selected for command of that unit." He watched as his four most senior officers looked around the table at one another, and noticed that Bud's eyes were darting between his two mentors. "Congratulations, Colonel MacKenzie."

Her head whipped around to face him, and her eyes widened. "Sir?"

Her surprise at everyone's confidence in her abilities charmed him. "Come to my office after this meeting, and we'll talk about the assignment." She nodded and he turned back to his notepad. "Let's get into new cases."

Mac watched him for a moment, and then turned to Harm. His eyes were on her, and his face had lost all traces of the smile he had given her a few minutes ago.

* * *

Mac shut the door to the Admiral's inner office, and took her usual chair. He handed her a folder and leaned back in his chair, and gave her a few minutes while she read. She finished and closed the file, and looked up at him.

"So, what do you think?"

"I think it sounds like a wonderful opportunity, sir."

He cocked his head to the side and studied her. He had to admit he been expecting more of a reaction. "It is a wonderful opportunity. There was a short list of candidates, and you were at the top of the list." She blushed and glanced at the folder in her lap. "Mac." His tone was soft, and she looked up. "Are you considering rejecting the assignment?"

"No!" She realized she had been louder than she meant, and repeated the word in a softer tone. "No. It's just… Well, the timing isn't ideal." She cleared her throat. "I… I'm in a new relationship."

"Ah." He walked around the desk and took the chair next to her. "I'm going to assume he's military?" She nodded and he sighed. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who the new relationship was with. "Can I speak to you as a friend for a moment, and not your commanding officer?" She nodded again and he leaned forward. "Mac, if you don't want this position because you don't want it, that's fine. You don't have to accept it. They'll just move on to the next name on the list, and you can go on with your regular duties here. But if you do want it, and you're thinking about saying no because of him, I'd like you to think long and hard about that." She swallowed, and he continued. "Dual military relationships can be difficult. Especially within the same career field. One person will usually have a better job than the other person. You'll have to take turns, and this could be your turn."

Mac slowly nodded. "Is he on the list?"

AJ snorted. "The SECNAV will never put him on a short list for anything. You're the only one from this office. Next on the list is a Commander Sturgis Turner." She nodded again, and he placed a hand on her shoulder. "If you need some time to think about it, that's fine. You can let me know tomorrow."

She shook her head. "I don't need to think about it. Of course I want it. Thank you so much for this opportunity."

He smiled and stood up. "It's my pleasure, Mac."

* * *

She opened her office door, and found Harm in her chair. "Hi." She reluctantly pushed the door shut behind her.

"Hey." He stood and walked over to her. "I guess congratulations are in order."

She bit her lower lip for a second, and then nodded. "Yes. I'm taking the position. I have to report for duty in ten days."

He gripped the back of the chair he was standing next to, and tried to gather his composure. She watched his knuckles tighten, and placed her hands over his. "We'll figure this out, Harm."

"Where are you going?"

She swallowed, and tightened her hands on his. "Joint Legal Services Southwest. San Diego."

He pulled his hands away, and began to pace. "San Diego. That sounds about right. We finally decide to give this thing between us a chance, and they send you to the opposite side of the country." He stopped pacing and leaned against her file cabinet. He crossed his arms over his chest, and frowned. "What do we do now?"

Mac glanced into the bullpen, and was relieved that everyone seemed to be focused on their own tasks. She placed a hand on his arm, and spoke softly. "You could come with me." His eyes widened, and she offered him a hesitant smile. "I mean, you obviously couldn't work with me. But there are several legal divisions in the area. I'm sure you'd have no trouble finding something."

He unfolded his arms, causing hers to fall back to her side. He spent a long moment studying her beautiful face, trying to sear her into his memory. Then he shook his head. "I can't go with you."

**End Part 9**


	10. Chapter 10

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes**: Before everyone gets upset, please remember in the story description it says 'Harm/Mac eventually'. You guys know as well as I do that Harm & Mac never do anything the easy way. More notes at the end.

_**Previously… **_

Mac glanced into the bullpen, and was relieved that everyone seemed to be focused on their own tasks. She placed a hand on his arm, and spoke softly. "You could come with me." His eyes widened, and she offered him a hesitant smile. "I mean, you obviously couldn't work with me. But there are several legal divisions. I'm sure you'd have no trouble finding something."

He unfolded his arms, causing hers to fall back to her side. He spent a long moment studying her beautiful face, trying to sear her into his memory. Then he shook his head. "I can't go with you."

**Part Ten**

Her eyes darkened, and she took a step back. "You can't go with me. You're not even going to think about it for a minute before telling me you can't go with me."

There was a gentle knock on her door, and she whipped around to see Bud standing at the door. She deflated, and Harm waved him in. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but Petty Officer Carter is here for his meeting with me and the Commander. He's in the conference room now."

"I'll be right there, Bud." Bud nodded, and pulled the door shut. Harm put his hands on Mac's shoulders and turned her to face him. "I'm sorry, we can't get into this right now. Will you come over after work tonight?" She nodded, and he forced a smile.

The rest of the day went by in a blur. Since she had to report to her new position within ten days, the out-processing had to begin immediately. She didn't see Harm again until she knocked on his door that evening.

He opened the door and frowned, and she knew this wasn't going to go well. "Why didn't you use your key?"

He stepped out of the way, and she entered the apartment. It smelled good – a pleasant mixture of lemons and garlic. "It didn't feel appropriate."

He pushed the door shut, and his frown deepened. "Why? Despite the fact that you're moving to the opposite side of the country, we're still a couple." He walked back to the kitchen and opened the oven door, and then shut it.

She followed him into the kitchen and crossed her arms over her chest. "Are we?"

His jaw clenched, but before he could answer, there was another knock at the door. He stared at her as he walked past, and pulled it open. He greeted the nanny with a forced smile, and reached for his daughter. "Sorry we're late, Harm. We went to the zoo this afternoon, and traffic was a nightmare getting back. Hi Mac." He waved off her apology, and kissed Amelia's forehead.

Mac forced a smile of her own. "Hi Lily."

Lily could feel the tension in the room, and looked around awkwardly. "Well, I guess I should be getting home. I'll see you tomorrow, Harm." He nodded, and she hurried out of the apartment.

"Want me to take her while you finish whatever you're cooking?"

"No." He took her to the living room, and settled her in the play pen with a toy and a few books. He ran his hand over her head, calming himself, and went back to the kitchen. "We're still a couple, Mac. People do long distance relationships all the time."

She shook her head. "Not like this. Most people go into a long-distance relationship knowing that there is an eventual end to the distance."

"There will be an end to the distance in this case too."

"When?"

He cocked his head to the side. "I'm sorry?"

"When do you see the distance coming to an end? Do you see yourself being ready to join me in a year? Two years? Three years? Or do you see yourself dragging this separation out until you get your own command in a few years, and then I put my career on the back burner to come be with you?"

"Mac, that's not fair."

"Okay. So, tell me. When do you see yourself moving to San Diego? It's an ideal move for you, after all. Your parents are there, and they would love being closer to Amelia."

"I don't know." He took a deep breath and bent over the counter. "I don't know." He straightened, and looked up at her. "What we have is amazing, but I'm not ready for what comes next. Moving to San Diego with you would be a huge step. We might as well buy a house, move in together, get married and have another baby."

She bit her lower lip and then took a deep breath. "I thought that was what you wanted." She gestured to Amelia's room. "A month ago, you told me that you wished we had made our baby deal at that very moment instead of five years in the future."

He moved around the counter and reached for her. "I meant that, Mac. But I didn't mean I wanted to have a child right then. I meant that… I don't really know what I meant. I want you. I want to be with you. I want to have a child with you someday. I'm just not ready for what moving across the country to be with you would mean."

She stepped away from him, and shoved her hands in her pockets. "And how long do you think you would even want to be in a long-distance relationship? Are you going to be able to put in the effort to make it work? I remember that you told me that you and Diane missed more than you connected. Annie was just in Baltimore, but work made it difficult for you to ever really have time together. So how will you make this work now? On opposite sides of the country, with demanding jobs, and now you have a daughter to think of. How will this work?"

His eyes had cooled when she mentioned Diane. "That's not fair."

She shrugged. "It may not be, but it's true."

The were both silent for a long moment, the only sound in the quiet apartment coming from Amelia's toy. He glanced at his daughter, and then back at Mac. "So, where does this leave us?" She shrugged again, and he felt his heart tighten. Her whole demeanor had changed.

"Maybe this all happened too fast." He opened his mouth, and she held up a hand. "You went from casually dating Renee, to being a father, to being in an instant family."

He reached for her again, and she stepped away from him. He moved quicker, and grabbed her wrist. "Stop. What we have is so good. It's working. It feels right."

She tugged her wrist free. "It's working because I'm more into you than you're into me. You're not having to change your lifestyle at all, because I'm all too willing." She offered him a sad smile. "You know it's true. I propositioned you in Australia, and you turned me down. I all but said how I felt before you left JAG, and yet when you got home, you immediately tried to get back together with Jordan. I go along with you not wanting to spend the night together during the week, and I'm always willing to come over here, because it's more convenient with Amelia. And if you got orders to the middle of nowhere and asked me to come with you, I would. No matter what the job was, or the climate, or anything else. I would come." She took a deep breath, and tried to force back the tears that she could feel coming. "You won't even consider coming with me, and that tells me all I need to know." She turned to discretely wipe her eyes, and saw Amelia watching them. She felt her chest tighten, and she took a few breaths before turning back to Harm. She reached for her purse. "I have to go."

He grabbed her wrist again to stop her. "Stop. Please." He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Where does this leave us?"

She took a deep breath, ignoring the shakiness of it. "At the end, I guess." She tugged free again, and left.

* * *

Mac was almost back to her apartment, when she changed directions and headed to Maddie's. She found a parking space, sprinted to her door, and knocked. She held her breath while waiting for an answer, hoping Maddie was home. She should have called first. She released the breath when the door opened, and she saw her friend.

"Hey, what are you…" She trailed off when she got a good look at Mac's face, and held the door open wider. "Come in. What happened?" Maddie held out a box of tissues, and Mac took one. She dabbed at her face, and took a deep breath.

"Harm and I broke up. I think we did, anyway." She took a breath and tried to steady herself. "And I really was just not sure if I was ready to go to my empty apartment."

Maddie took Mac's arm and led her to the sofa. She gently nudged her down, and sat beside her. "Did you have a drink?" Mac shook her head. "Do you want a drink?" She shook her head again. "Did you think about one?" This time Mac nodded, and Maddie grabbed her hand. "I'm glad you came over. Tell me what happened?"

Mac recounted the events of the day, starting with her new position and ending with her parting line to Harm. "And now on top of everything else I'm feeling; I feel weak and pathetic for even thinking about a drink. I've had relationships end before. I shouldn't be feeling like this."

"You've never ended a relationship with the person you believe is the love of your life. And you've never had to leave a baby behind that you love like she's your own." Maddie's voice was gentle, and she squeezed her hand. "You're not weak, or pathetic. Unfortunately, you're human, just like the rest of us."

She barked out a laugh, and dabbed at her face again. "I don't like being human."

Maddie shrugged. "It's better than the alternative. Remember how you were when we met? You were so closed off and guarded. You wouldn't even accept my invitation to go out for coffee. You kept to yourself, and didn't make connections because you were convinced that connections never last." She smiled and pulled her legs up. "And then you and Harm became good friends. And you met Bud and Harriet. And then you finally approached me at the gym and asked if I still wanted to get a coffee. I know opening yourself up to people gives them the potential to hurt you, but think of the relationships you would have missed if you hadn't." She hopped off the couch and grabbed two bottles of water from the kitchen, and handed one to Mac. "So, what happens now? With you and Harm. You told Harm it's the end. Did you really mean it?"

Mac nodded, and took a sip of her water. "I did. I don't know what the future will bring, but I think it's at least the end for now." She shrugged, and placed the cap back on the bottle. "I don't like feeling this way. He fights for everyone else in his life, but he won't fight for me? He'll travel to Russia searching for the truth about his father, he'll contemplate murder over a woman who has been dead for years, but he won't even consider moving to California to be with me? I can't live with that, no matter how much part of me is willing to."

"Maybe it's not just that he's not ready to take your relationship to the next level," Maddie said. "Maybe he's jealous that your career is getting a bump and his isn't. Maybe he's worried he'll go from doing high profile cases and this secret agent man stuff you two so frequently get dragged into, and will now spend his days writing wills and settling up powers of attorney."

"If that's his problem, then that makes me even more angry. No one forced him to leave JAG last year. Everyone told him it would be a setback in his career. He didn't listen, because being a fighter pilot was more important to him than anything else." Mac dropped her head against the back of the couch and sighed. "We both can't be on top. Right now, it's my turn, and he needs to be adult enough to accept that.

* * *

**Six Days Later**

Mac left JAG for the last time, and took a few deep breaths in her car to calm her nerves. No goodbyes had been said – that would come at her going away dinner tonight. She sat in her car for a long moment and studied the front of the building. So many of her favorite memories with Harm happened in this building.

"_Five years from this moment, if neither of us is in a relationship, we'll go halves on a kid."_

"_You and me? Have a baby together?" _

"_Yeah. With your looks and my brains, he'll be perfect."_

"_And what if she has your looks and my brains? That could work too."_

"_So, what do you say? Deal?"_

"_Don't make a promise you can't keep."_

"_I haven't yet."_

She thought of Amelia, and realized she needed to say goodbye to the little girl. She scanned the parking lot and sighed when she saw his car in its normal spot. It didn't take long to reach Harm's apartment, and used her key fob for what would be the last time to gain access into the complex. She knocked on his door, and forced a smile when Lily answered it.

Lily smiled awkwardly, unsure of what to say after the tension she had witnessed when she brought Amelia from the zoo. "Hey Mac. Come on in. Harm's not here right now."

"I know, he's still at work. Listen, this is probably weird, but I'm moving to California tomorrow, and I'd really like to say goodbye to Amelia."

"Of course. She's in the living room." Lily followed Mac to the living room, and watched as Mac gracefully lowered herself to the floor. Lily had the overwhelming feeling that she was intruding, and glanced at her watch. "I'm going to run to the main office and check for the mail since you're here. Do you mind staying with her for a few minutes?"

"I'm happy to. Thanks, Lily." Lily nodded and grabbed her keys before leaving, and Mac turned her attention back to Amelia, and pulled her into her lap. "I'm really going to miss you, sweetheart." Amelia reached for Mac's face, and Mac placed a kiss on her chubby hand. "I know you don't understand any of this, but I just want you to know this has nothing to do with you." She took a deep breath, and tried to force back her tears. "I really, really wanted to be your mama. Be good for your dad, okay?"

* * *

Harm sat on the steps of Mac's building and waited for her to get home. He couldn't stomach the thought of going to her going away dinner. There wasn't enough bourbon in the world to make it through that. Initially he had been crushed when she had ended things. Now he was just angry. He was angry that she had told him she would always be there for him and Amelia, and now she was leaving. He was angry that she questioned his feelings for her. He was angry that she was being so rigid in her refusal to give long distance a try. And of course, he was angry at himself.

Her car pulled up, and he straightened. He watched her slide out of the driver's seat and then reach back into the car for her purse and a few gift bags. She straightened, and he felt his mouth go dry. She was wearing a red dress that he loved on her, and impossibly high heels. She was halfway to her building when she saw him and came to a halt. She took a deep breath and continued walking.

"Hey."

He stood as she approached. "Hi." Mac unlocked the door, and didn't bother to shut it behind her. She knew he was right behind her. She deposited the gifts and her purse on the kitchen counter, and turned to look at him. His eyes were scanning the completely empty apartment, and she crossed her arms over her chest. "Wow. I wasn't expecting it to be this empty in here."

"I'm leaving tomorrow, Harm. What were you expecting?"

"I expected more from us than this." He frowned and leaned against the counter. "I expected you to at least stop by and say goodbye to Amelia."

Her eyes narrowed. "I did, actually. I stopped by today after I left JAG. Ask Lily if you don't believe me. She let me spend a few minutes with her." She reached for her purse and dug around for her keys. She removed the fob and slid it across the counter to him.

He ignored the key fob and focused his intense gaze on her. "You went when I was at work? Why?"

"I didn't want to see you. Saying goodbye to her was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Doing it with you there would have been impossible. I love that little girl, Harm. You know that. I would never leave without saying goodbye to her."

"But you'll leave without saying goodbye to me?"

She opened the fridge and pulled out a soda. "I was expecting you to be mature and professional enough to come to my dinner tonight."

He shook his head. "After everything we've been to each other, I don't get a more personal goodbye than the rest of our coworkers?"

Mac leaned against the counter. "What do you want from me, Harm? What kind of goodbye are you looking for? Heartfelt words? A goodbye kiss? A goodbye fuck? What do you want from me?"

Her profanity made him wince. "I don't know what I want. I want you not to go. I want you to give long distance a try."

"Would you go if you were me?" He looked at the floor, and she felt vindicated. "I'll take that as a yes. Can you tell me that you'll be ready to come to San Diego in six months? Or a year? Or two years?" He remained silent. "If you were the one with orders, would you ask me to come with you?" She gave him a sad smile. "That's what I thought. Go home, Harm. Please. Just go."

**End Part 10. **

**More notes**: Yes, this is dramatic and kind of soap opera-ish. Sorry. But I wanted to write a different Harm than I usually do. My typical Harm has no trouble letting Mac know that he adores her. He's committed, he puts her first, he's communicative. All things that real Harm typically was not. Real Harm was kind of a brat when he didn't get his way. He was horrible at telling Mac how he felt. That's what I'm trying to get across here. I'm trying to bring little bits of the Harm that tells her they're at the end (post JAG-a-thon), the Harm that left 17 voicemails unreturned (post-Paraguay), and the Harm that made snide comments about her relationships with the men in her life. Because even though he wasn't an asshole, he could definitely be one at times.

Anyway. I'm mostly writing this note, because I'm really, REALLY nervous about posting this. I'm sure I'm going to get some negative comments, so I'm just going to ask those negative commenters to be gentle. I'm not going to make this excessively dramatic, and I promise I won't drag this out for too long.

**One more note**. A few of the reviews I've already gotten made me realize I forgot something - Mac isn't perfect by any means. She can be every bit as difficult as Harm is. But people are always polite when she's the making bad fanfiction decisions. People are less forgiving when Harm is portrayed as anything other than perfect. But I love both of these characters, their flaws and all.


	11. Chapter 11

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes**: These next few parts will be a little shorter than normal. I'm wordy, so some of you may consider that a good thing =)

**Part Eleven**

**Two weeks Later… **

Harm walked into the crowded bar and scanned the room. He spotted Sturgis Turner sitting in a corner booth and headed in that direction. Sturgis was an old friend from the academy, and Harm had been pleased when it was announced that he was coming to JAG headquarters. If only he hadn't been assigned to replace Mac. He slid into the booth and smiled at his old friend. "It's been a long time, Sturgis."

Sturgis raised his beer glass and then grinned. "I guess that would work better if you had one of these." He waved at the waitress, and sat quietly while she took Harm's order. Once she was gone, he leaned back in the booth, and drew shapes in the condensation on the glass. "How've you been? It's been a while."

Harm flipped the coaster through his fingers and shrugged. "Life has been a little insane lately." He offered a slight smile and reached for his wallet. "For starters, I have a little girl." He opened the wallet and pulled out a photo of Amelia. He extended it to Sturgis, who's eyes were wide with disbelief. "She's almost eight months old."

He took the photo and studied it for a moment before handing it back. "She's beautiful. She must take after her mother."

Harm snorted and returned the photo to his wallet. "She does. She has her coloring and most of her features. But my eyes."

"I can't wait to meet them both."

He couldn't help but wince. "Her mother died in a car accident a few months ago. So, it's just Amelia and I. And a nanny and a few back up babysitters I don't think I could live without." He looked up as the waitress approached, and smiled as she dropped off his beer, and then told Sturgis about Claudia, Claire's surprising visit, and Amelia.

Sturgis whistled lightly. "That's rough. Poor thing." He took a swig of his beer. "Any other beautiful women in your life? A girlfriend? If I recall, you always had plenty sniffing around."

"No. There's no one." Harm's tone had grown chilly, and his face had hardened.

"Who was she?"

He was quiet for a moment, while he decided how much he wanted to tell. He was a private person, but he had felt so alone since he and Mac had broken up. Losing his girlfriend had been bad enough, but he had also lost his best friend, and the only person he had felt comfortable confiding in. Finally, he leaned back in the booth and sighed. "She was the person who's job you now have. Sarah MacKenzie. She's a Marine. We've worked together for about four years."

Sturgis was surprised. He couldn't believe Harm had dated a coworker. He was typically too cautious for that. A fling, sure. But dating someone he worked with seriously enough to make him this sullen? That was unlike him. "What happened?"

Harm shrugged and sipped his beer. "She got orders to San Diego. She wanted me to come with her, but I wasn't ready for that kind of commitment. We had only been dating for about a month, and I thought that was too soon for me to pack up and move across the country with her. So, she ended things."

"Were you in love with her?"

He shrugged again, and stared at the coaster he was still fidgeting with. "I don't know. I think I was. I know I would have been if we had more time. I could see a future with her." He dropped the coaster, and watched it roll to the middle of the table. "But we didn't have time. She's there, and I'm here, and I guess that's the end of that."

Sturgis watched his old friend for a moment and then shrugged. "It doesn't have to be the end. Have you talked to her since she's been gone?"

"No. Our goodbye was unpleasant. I don't really know what we'd even say." He picked at the loose piece of veneer on the cheap table and then stopped and folded his hands. "I don't have anything to say to her. And I really don't want to talk about her anymore." He finished his beer and signaled to the waitress. "How have you been since the last time I saw you?"

* * *

Harm walked into the apartment, and dropped his keys on the small table. Lily watched from the sofa as he emptied his pockets into the small dish and stood. "Did you have a good evening?"

He jumped at the sound of her voice. "I did, thanks. And thanks for staying late with Amelia. My friend and I hadn't seen each other in years, so it was good to catch up."

She leaned against the counter and smiled. "You pay me really well to hang out with an incredibly sweet kid. Well, most of the time she's sweet. I'm happy to babysit anytime."

He offered her a wry smile, and sat on one of the bar stools. "She's been irritable since Mac and I ended things. I hope she's being better behaved for you than she is for me."

She placed her hand on his arm and squeezed gently, letting her hand linger. "She's just adjusting. She was so attached to Mac. This will just take a little time. I put her down a little while ago, and she fell asleep easily. She'll be fine."

"I know." He gently shifted, so her hand dropped from his arm, and he stood. "Do you want me to pay you now for tonight, since it's not a part of your normal job hours? Or just add it to your check on Friday?"

"You can add it to my check." She moved past him, and grabbed her purse from the hook by the door. "I'll see you both tomorrow."

Harm watched her leave, and then locked the door behind her. He stopped in his bedroom first and changed out of the jeans and t-shirt he had been wearing, and then went across the hall to Amelia's room. She was asleep in her crib, and he wished he had gotten home earlier. He lightly placed his hand on her belly, and felt her breathe for a long moment. He hated that she was suffering because of his and Mac's actions. He hated that Renee had been right. He hated that he wanted to pick up the phone and call Mac, just to hear the sound of her voice. And he hated himself for being so weak. He wouldn't do that. He wouldn't call. She was the one who had ended things – if anyone was going to do the calling, it should be her. He shook his head to clear his thoughts, and then bent over the railing to kiss Amelia's forehead. "Goodnight, sweetheart."

* * *

"Calling it a day, ma'am?"

Mac glanced up at her assistant, a very young female staff sergeant she had liked instantly. "I am, Erica. It's nearly 7:00. Why are you still here?"

Erica gnawed on her bottom lip for a moment. "I just wanted to stay to make sure you didn't need anything." She shrugged sheepishly. "I didn't have anything better to do."

Mac smiled, and gestured to the door. "I appreciate that." They walked to the doors, and Erica waited while Mac locked up. "Drive safely. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yes ma'am." Mac watched as Erica got in her car and drove away before getting in her own. It was a beautiful night, and the sun was just starting to set. She rolled down her windows and started the short drive to her new apartment, before changing course and headed to a taco stand near the water. There was no food in her kitchen, and tacos sounded so much better than a pizza. She circled the block a few times before finally finding a parking spot, and walked the few blocks to the tacos. Almost instantly, she wished she had gone home to change first. She felt conspicuous in her uniform. The line wasn't long, and less than 10 minutes later she was walking back to her car with her dinner when her heart nearly stopped. Walking towards her was Frank Burnett, and now she really wished she had changed into casual clothes and was able to blend in better with the youthful crowd. Seeing Harm's stepfather was absolutely the last thing she needed.

But he did spot her, and offered her a large smile. "Mac! Hi! What brings you out here? Harm didn't tell us you'd be in the area. Is he out here too?"

She forced a smile, and then frowned. 'What brought her out here?' Had Harm not told them? He and his family had never talked that often, but she had thought that had changed once they learned about Amelia's existence. He now talked to his mother at least once a week, and emailed her photos of the baby even more often. "I live here now. And Harm and I aren't together anymore." Her tongue darted out to moisten her lower lip. "Have you not spoken to him lately?"

"No, we've been in Belgium for the past three weeks. Phone calls have been very minimal. What happened?" Frank didn't even bother to hide his surprise. The last time Trish had spoken to her son, everything had been wonderful between he and Mac. He glanced at the bag of food in her hand. "I'm sorry, it's none of my business. I should let you get back to your dinner."

She smiled. "Thanks." And then she shrugged. "There isn't much to tell. I received orders out here. Harm didn't want to come with me, and I didn't want to be in a long-distance relationship with no end in sight. So, we broke up." She moved the bag of food to her other hand and forced a smile. "Anyways. It was nice seeing you, Frank."

"You too, Mac." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a business card holder. He handed her a card and smiled. "I doubt you'll use it, but if you need anything, feel free to give me a call."

She slid the card into a pocket of her purse. "Thank you, I appreciate that." They said their goodbyes, and she hurried to her car to head home. Once she had reached the apartment complex, she hurried to the elevator, impatiently tapped her foot as it climbed to the tenth floor, and finally entered her apartment. She dropped her purse, keys, and the bag of tacos on the kitchen counter and picked up the phone. She didn't want to call Harm. She knew hearing his voice would wreck any of the progress she had made of the past two weeks. But she had to give him a little notice and let him know that his parents knew about their breakup. She took a deep breath and dialed his number, and paced in the kitchen while waiting for him to answer.

"Rabb."

Mac inhaled sharply. "Hey, it's me." He was silent on the other end, and she blushed. Had he already forgotten the sound of her voice? It was almost 11:00 in Virginia. Was he in bed? Was he in bed alone? "It's Mac."

"Hi."

"Listen, I'm sorry to call. And for calling so late. But I thought you should know I ran into Frank today." She heard his intake of breath and could imagine him wincing. "He asked what brought me out here, and if you were here too. So, I told him that we had…" She swallowed, and forced herself to continue. "That we had broken up."

"It wasn't your place to tell him that." His voice was cold, and she fought back tears. She would not cry over this.

"I know. But I didn't want to lie, and it just slipped out. Anyway. I just wanted to give you a little notice before you talk to them again." They were both silent for a moment. She knew she should say goodbye and end the call, but she couldn't bring herself to do it just yet. "How are y-"

"Listen, is there anything else?" He cut her off, not willing to participate in meaningless small talk. "It's late here, and I need to get to bed."

She swallowed again, and made a fist with her free hand, almost enjoying the feeling of her nails digging into her skin. "No, nothing else. Bye, Harm."

"Goodbye."

**End Part 11. **


	12. Chapter 12

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Twelve **

**One Month Later… **

Sturgis watched as Harm slammed the door to his office and then turned to Bud Roberts. He was standing in the doorway to his own office, and all of the color had drained from his face. Sturgis began walking to Bud, and who stepped back to let him enter. He shut the door behind him and studied the younger man. "What happened?"

Bud shook his head. He was jittery from the interaction with his normally mild-mannered mentor. He had seen Harm angry before. He had seen him yell before. But he had never been on the receiving end of his temper. "I- I tried to talk him out of doing something that I didn't think was wise."

Sturgis cocked his head to the side. "What does he want to do?"

Bud was quiet for a moment and watched the activity in the bullpen. Everyone else had gone back to work, and Clayton Webb was nowhere to be seen. "Did you see the man in the gray suit?" Sturgis nodded, and he continued. "That's Clayton Webb. He'll tell you he's the Under Secretary of Whatever, but he's actually CIA. And he always tries to draw Harm and M…" He trailed off and looked into the open windows of Harm's office. "He always tries to draw Harm into his missions. And they never, ever go well."

Sturgis frowned. If anyone other than Bud Roberts had been telling him this, he would have thought they were making up stories. "Why does the CIA need help from a Navy lawyer?"

Bud shrugged. "The first time was because of Colonel MacKenzie. They were trying to track someone she had personal experience with. So, they brought her here, she was assigned to work with the Commander, and they got involved in Webb's mission. After that, he seemed to come to them often." He shrugs again. "The Admiral usually tells them that they don't have to help, but they always do anyway."

"And Webb wants his help again?"

"I assume so. Webb doesn't like me, so I'm not usually included in the meetings. But the Commander left the Admiral's office with him, and then came to tell me that he was off of the Evans court-martial, so I put two and two together. I told him that he shouldn't help Webb with whatever he came here for. These missions never went according to plan when he had the Colonel with him for help, and this time he would be alone. I reminded him that he has Amelia to think about, and she's already lost her mother. That's when he blew up at me."

Sturgis winced. He could see where Bud was coming from and knew his heart had been in the right place. But he wasn't the least bit surprised that Harm hadn't taken it well. "Don't worry about it. I'll go talk to him and see if I can calm him down. I outrank him by a few months, so maybe I can get him to listen." He smiled and clapped his hand on Bud's shoulder. "You're a good friend. One day when he's not so pissed off at the world, he'll remember that." He left the office, pulling the door shut behind him. He took a deep breath before tapping on his old friend's door. The sullen and irritable man he had worked with this past month was nothing like the friend he had made all those years ago. He tapped on the door and opened it before Harm could respond. Harm looked up at him briefly before returning his attention to the paperwork in front of him. Sturgis took one of the chairs and crossed his arms over his chest. "I just talked to Lieutenant Roberts."

Harm scowled and shut the file. "So, what? Now you think I'm a bad father too?"

Sturgis' eyes widened, and he leaned back. "He does not think you're a bad father, and neither do I. He just told me about Webb, and how these missions never go well, even when you have help."

Harm fidgeted with his ring, and thought back to his previous missions, and the help Sturgis was referring to. He thought of Mac in a sundress in an Arizona dessert, and of her in a navy-blue evening gown in the Sudanese Embassy. He could almost feel her pressed against him as they hobbled out of the embassy that night. "Well, I don't have help anymore, but life must go on. I'm needed, and it's my duty to serve my country."

Sturgis rolled his eyes. "You've served your country as a pilot, and now you're serving your country as a lawyer. I know this secret agent man stuff might sound more appealing than legal briefs, but it's not your job. It's not your responsibility." He watched Harm's hands clench into fists, and he leaned forward. "Amelia is your responsibility. Bud wasn't trying to guilt you. He just wanted you to realize that before you went to play spy. Your daughter needs you."

"I know she needs me. And I'm here. I'm not going to leave her. Nothing bad is going to happen to me."

"Like nothing bad happened to your father?" He watched as Harm's face paled, and then turned an alarming shade of red. He softened his tone. "Harm, bad things happen all the time, and we can't control them. Look at what happened to Amelia's mother. And the worst thing imaginable happened to your dad while he was doing his duty. The point that Bud was trying to make, and the point that I'm trying to make, is don't take these unnecessary risks. I'm sure the CIA has plenty of qualified people who can do whatever it is they want you to do. Don't let someone else's duty take you away from Amelia."

Harm glanced at the framed photo of Amelia that now sat next to the one of him and his father. He turned back to Sturgis. "You're right. You and Bud are right. I just feel so out of sorts. I feel like I'm failing at everything except for my job. I'm failing Amelia. I don't think I'm enough for her. She deserves more than me." He glanced at the photo again and sighed. "I guess I feel that since I'm failing as a father, I can at least excel here. I can take the hard cases and take the dangerous missions." He shrugged. "But it makes no sense. Because the more I do here, the more I feel like a failure at home."

"Buddy, I'm sure every single parent in the world feels that way sometimes. But you're not a failure. I've been around Amelia. She's a bright, engaged, happy little kid. And she adores you." Sturgis leaned back in his chair and smiled. "If you're feeling out of sorts, why not get away for a few days with Amelia. "I'm sure there isn't enough convincing in the world to get you to San Diego to see Trish and Frank, but Grandma Sarah's farm is just as far from California as DC is. It'll do you good."

He straightened in his chair and nodded. Sturgis was right. Bud had been right. "I owe Bud an apology."

"You do," Sturgis confirmed.

"And you're right. Going to the farm for a few days would probably be good for both Amelia and I."

"It would be."

Harm smiled for the first time since his confrontation with Bud. "Thanks man. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to apologize to Bud, and tell the Admiral and Clay that I'm not going to take this assignment."

* * *

Harm paid signed the credit card slip and put his credit card back in his wallet. He had taken Bud out for a drink to apologize for the way he had acted earlier. Bud had accepted the apology, and their time at the bar had been pleasant. He slid out of the booth, and his eyes fell on the door as he straightened. Mac's friend Maddie walked into the bar, and he felt his relatively good mood evaporate. He watched as she scanned the bar, and then stiffened as her eyes landed on him. She frowned and then pointed out a high-top table near the bar to her friend.

He fished his keys out of his pocket and hurried to the door. He stepped outside and let out a deep sigh. It was nearly October and it felt amazing outside. He walked at a slower pace to his car and clicked the fob to unlock it when he was close.

"Harm."

He turned and saw Maddie standing at the bar door. Her long red hair fell over her shoulders, and her arms were crossed over her chest. He wanted to ignore her. He turned and kept walking to his car, wanting to get home to his child. He owed this woman nothing.

"She's miserable without you."

He stopped walking and turned to face her. He took a few steps towards her, so they wouldn't end up yelling across the parking lot. "She did this. She left me."

Maddie took a few steps to close the gap. "She wanted you to come with her."

"And I wasn't ready for that." He felt his frustration building. He was so tired of everyone blaming this break-up on him. His mother had been livid. His grandmother had been disappointed. Claire had been completely stunned and tried to convince him that he had made a huge mistake. The Admiral had given him the worst cases for the first week she had been gone. They all seemed to forget that she was the one who had broken up with him – not the other way around. "What is so hard for everyone to understand about that? We had been a couple for a month and moving to the other side of the country for her would have been a huge step that I wasn't ready for."

"She loves you." Maddie made sure to use the present tense of the word. She wanted him to go to her. To at least talk to her. "She loves you. What's worse? Moving faster than you're comfortable with, or losing her forever?"

He shoved his hands in his pockets and shook his head. "It's not just about me and her. I have Amelia to consider. And I'm not going to apologize for not being ready to uproot my daughter's life yet again and move across the country." He turned and took a few steps towards his car before turning back and moving closer to her. "I'm so tired of everyone making me out to be the bad guy here. She broke my heart, and my daughter's heart, and yet I'm the bad guy. And I'm sick of it." He turned again, walking away from her for good this time.

* * *

Harm wanted to go to bed, but there was a small problem. A seventeen-pound problem actually, that was currently sound asleep on his chest. She had another tooth coming in, and it had taken forever to get her to sleep. He stroked her hair and was silent as he listened to her breathe. Webb had been angry when he had backed out of the mission, but Bud and Sturgis had been absolutely right – this was where he needed to be.

His eyes scanned the coffee table for something to read, but instead fell on the four envelopes of photos Lily had gotten developed and picked up for him. He had thanked her, but had just wanted to ignore them. Most of the photographs would be of Amelia – that was a given. He hadn't even owned a camera before she came into his life. But he knew that the older rolls of film included photos of Mac. He reached for one of the yellow envelopes and hoped it was one of the newer rolls. But of course, it wasn't, and the very first photo in the set was one of Mac and Amelia. They were in his bed, Mac was propped up against pillows with Amelia in her lap, and one of Amelia's books in front of them. He flipped to the next one and felt a pang. Just Mac this time, covered in paint after they had finished painting Amelia's nursery. He flipped through all of the photos, every single one of Mac, Amelia, or Mac with Amelia, and he felt his heart break a little more. They had been happy. So happy. Why had she been so unwilling to give him time, and to let things just happen at a slower pace?

Before he could talk himself out of it, he reached for the phone and dialed her familiar cell phone number. The phone rang four times before her voicemail picked up, and he ended the call without leaving a message. He stared at the phone, feeling his mood darken more. Was she out with another man? Maybe she wasn't as miserable as Maddie had implied. He had just dropped the phone onto the coffee table when it began to ring. He answered it quickly, hoping the ringing wouldn't wake the sleeping child. "Hello?"

"May I speak to Harmon Rabb please?"

"Speaking." He didn't recognize the voice, but it sounded strained. Like the caller had been crying and he felt a chill run through him.

"Mr. Rabb, this is Jacob Meyer. I'm a friend of your grandmother's. And I'm so sorry to have to tell you this, but she passed away this evening."

**End Part 12. **

**Notes:** Yes, I feel really bad about killing Sarah Rabb. But last time I killed off a family member it was Frank, and since Mac's mother just announced a life-threatening issue in my other fic, it had to be Sarah this time. I know it seems like I'm picking on Harm, but killing off Uncle Matt just wouldn't have worked for the story line. Also, this gets happier soon, I promise. On a lighter note, does anyone else miss using film in cameras and picking up the developed photos at the drugstore? It was always exciting, since you never knew what they would look like, and (if you're like me and dropped off like ten rolls at a time) finding photos you'd forgotten you'd taken.


	13. Chapter 13

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Thirteen**

"Ma'am? There is a Harriet Sims on the phone for you."

"Thanks Erica." Mac released the intercom button and picked up the receiver. "Harriet, hi! How are you guys?"

"We're good ma'am, thank you. Well, other than the morning sickness. I think it may be the death of me." Harriet cleared her throat. "Ma'am, I know this isn't my place, and Bud told me to stay out of it, but I wanted to make sure you heard about Commander Rabb."

Mac could have sworn her heart stopped at those words, and her palms instantly went clammy. "No, we haven't spoken in a while. Is he okay? Is Amelia okay?"

Harriet winced, wishing she had started this better. Mac sounded frantic, and she rushed to reassure her. "They're both fine, ma'am." She paused and took a deep breath. "His grandmother passed away a couple of days ago. He and his family are in Pennsylvania for the funeral. It's the day after tomorrow. I just thought you'd want to know so you could send flowers. Or something."

'Or something.' She knew what Harriet had been hinting at. Would Harm even want her there? Or would it upset more him at an already upsetting time? Mac bit her lower lip and tried to force back the tears. She knew how much he loved his grandmother and couldn't imagine the pain he must be feeling. "Thanks for letting me know, Harriet. I really appreciate it."

"You're welcome. Take care of yourself, ma'am."

Mac hung up the phone and pushed her chair back. She stood and began to pace around the office. She could send flowers. That would be appropriate. She thought about the beautiful arrangement he had sent when her father had died. A man she hadn't cared about and hadn't seen in nearly half of her life. The grandmother he had adored deserved so much more than flowers. She sat back down at the desk and dialed her commanding officer. She twirled the cord around her finger while she waited for an answer, and then for his assistant to connect her to him. Finally, his booming voice was in her ear, and she instantly sat up straighter in her chair. "General Marsh? I need to take a couple days of leave."

Mac had called Harriet back when she had gotten home from the office, and Harriet had gladly emailed her all of the details for the funeral. It would be at the small church Sarah Rabb had attended for nearly her entire life, and there would be a reception following at the Rabb Farmhouse. Her eyes filled as she read the obituary. _'Preceded in death by her beloved husband, Peter, and her son, Harmon Sr. She is survived by her grandson, Harmon Jr., and her great-granddaughter, Amelia._'

She shut down her computer and began to pack for the short trip. General Marsh had been accommodating and had told her she could have the rest of the week, as long as she had confidence in her senior staff to handle things in her absence. In all honestly, she had more faith in her assistant, but she knew the two young Lieutenant Commanders would be fine being in charge for three days. She had tried calling Harm, but his phone unsurprisingly went straight to voicemail. She pulled a few pairs of jeans and tops from the closet and tossed them onto the bed, and then dug out a simple black dress to wear to the service. She added a pair of black pumps to the bed, and a pair of brown leather boots, and then began to neatly roll the clothing to fit in the carry-on suitcase easier.

Once she was packed, and her bag and a light jacket sat by the door, she collapsed onto the sofa and drew her knees up to her chest.

* * *

The pallbearers began to carry the coffin from the crowded church, and Harm took a deep breath as he stood. His mother rubbed his back for a moment as she had done when he was a boy, and then gave him a gentle nudge. He stepped out of the pew and fell in line behind the casket. Trish fell into place next to him and linked her arm through his. They began to walk, with Frank and Jacob following behind. Trish had insisted that Jacob sit with the family, as he had been Sarah's companion for many years. After what felt like an eternity of smiling politely at the friends who had gathered, they finally reached the end of the church and Harm faltered. Mac was sitting in the last pew. Their eyes locked for a brief moment, and then she looked down at the crumpled program in her hands. He wasn't able to gather his thoughts until he was in the family car, and she was no longer in sight. What was she doing here? How did she know? What was he supposed to do now? He alternated between being pleased she had come all this way for the funeral of a woman she had never met and being annoyed that her presence was wreaking chaos with his already fragile emotional state.

The graveside service was private, and only Harm, his parents and Jacob were in attendance. Harm looked over the marker for the grandfather he had never known, and the marker for his father. He remembered the day his grandmother had done this, and how outraged he had been. He had been so angry that she and his mother had given up on him. She had just looked at him, and calmly told him that she needed this. She had needed a place to come to honor her son, and that one day he would understand. And he did. That's what the Wall had become for him.

Once it was finished, they made their way back to the Rabb farmhouse for the reception the ladies in her Sunday School class had arranged. The driveway and street were packed with cars, and he realized after a minute of searching that he was looking for a red Corvette, and then thought that was ridiculous. She had obviously flown and would have a generic rental car. The four of them made their way inside and began greeting everyone who came to pay their respects.

"You should go find Mac."

Harm looked up at his mother, surprise written all over his face. "Excuse me?"

Trish smiled patiently. "I saw her at the church. You should go find her. And talk." She looked around the room and shrugged. "You've been polite to Sarah's friends and have spent the last hour listening to these people tell you how much she loved you and how much you look like your father. Frank and Jacob will help me host. Go find her."

"She may have left already."

She stared at him for a minute. "Harm, do you really believe that girl flew all the way out here to sit in the back of a church for forty-five minutes, and then leave without saying anything?" He shrugged, and she shook her head. "Go."

He sighed and walked out the front door and went outside. The wraparound porch seemed to be empty, until he moved to the side of the house. She was standing against the railing in a sleek black dress, and the grief took a momentary backseat as he appreciated how beautiful she was. "What are you doing here?"

She jumped at the sound of his voice, and then turned to face him. "I know how much she meant to you. I wanted to pay my respects."

He moved closer to her, stopping when there was still a good two feet of space between them. "You could have sent flowers."

She shrugged. "You sent flowers when the father who wasn't a part of my life died. I thought the grandmother you adored deserved more." She looked down at her hands, and his gaze followed hers. She was wearing nail polish, something she normally avoided. It was the color of red wine, and made her long fingers look even more elegant. "I'll go if you want me to. I don't want to make things harder for you." He was silent, and she took that as a sign to leave. She took a breath, and hoped he didn't notice the shakiness, and started for the side steps.

"Don't go. Please." She stopped, and then turned to face him. "Want to take a walk?" She nodded, and he walked to her. They stepped off the porch and began walking. He made sure to keep a decent amount of space between them, and he pointed to a pond. "Let's walk over there." They were silent as they walked, both unsure of what to say. Finally, he cleared his throat, and pointed to a small dock with an ancient looking rowboat tied to it. "I had my first kiss there."

Mac looked up at him and offered a slight smile. "How old were you?

He shoved his hands in his pockets and thought for a minute. "Almost thirteen, I think." They walked in silence for a minute while he remembered the day. "Mom and Frank had gotten married earlier in the year, and I wasn't handling it well. I more or less terrorized the household. So, Grams decided I should come here for the summer." He smiled at the memory. "I'm not sure who was more excited about the idea, me or mom." He snuck a glance at her. Her head was down, but he could see that she was smiling. "When I got here, she wouldn't let me sulk. I had chores every day, and on Sunday nights I went with her to a weekly dinner her church had. She hoped I'd meet other kids my age, and stop being such a little shit."

Mac looked up at him. "I'm guessing you met at least one."

He smiled and then looked away. "I met exactly one. Her name was Laura." He glanced back at the farmhouse. "She and her husband are actually at the house right now. She was as moody and sullen as I was, so we hit it off right away."

"I know your reasoning for being moody and sullen. What was hers?"

"Her parents had just gotten divorced. Her father had run off with a much, much younger woman and apparently everyone in town was talking about it. She pretty much hated everyone and everything. Just like me." He gestured to the dock with his chin. "We would sit there and talk about how the world sucked, and adults sucked, and everything sucked. And one day I just decided to kiss her." They were close to the dock by that moment and stood there awkwardly.

Mac stepped to the waters edge and took in the view. The property was beautiful, especially from this spot. He joined her at the edge of the dock and she ached to touch him, and wished her dress had pockets, or something tactile that would give her hands something to fidget with. "What are your other favorite spots out here?"

He glanced up a hill to a bright red barn. "There's a hayloft in the barn. It was always my favorite spot to be alone." She nodded, and he knew she wanted to see it but would never ask. There had been a lot of girls during his summers here, but he had never taken one up there. "Come on. I'm curious if it's still the same. They began the trek up the hill. She had stopped at one point and taken her impossibly high heels off. He pulled open the barn door and eyed the ladder that led to the loft. He glanced at her bare feet and shrugged. "We don't have to go up."

"Let's do it." She sat her shoes on the ground and began climbing the ladder. He looked away as she climbed and didn't start climbing until she was safely at the top. When he made it to the top, he stood quietly and watched her for a moment. All of his childhood drawings were still pinned to the walls, and she was studying them with a slight smile on her face. She gestured at one and looked over her shoulder at him. It was actually a very good drawing of his biplane. "You should take this back with you and have it framed for Amelia's room." Her smile faltered at his daughter's name, and she bit her lower lip. "How is she? Is she here?"

He felt his walls go back up and shrugged. "She's at home. Lily is keeping her during the day, and Bud and Harriet have her at night. And she's fine. She took your leaving hard. And she's cutting another tooth. That's always fun." She turned away from him, and he felt the anger and hurt that had become a part of him bubble up and had to ask something that had been bothering him since the last time he had seen her at her apartment. "Were you only with me to have her?"

She whipped around, her eyes wide and her mouth ajar. "No. God, no." She looked at her hands and realized she could pick off the nail polish for something to do. "No. I care about her, and I have since the moment I first held her. But I wanted you. I'd always wanted you. Amelia or no Amelia, my feelings for you don't change."

He felt some of the anger leave his body and maneuvered his long frame in a sitting position on the floor. "You've been wanting a baby for a while now. And suddenly I have a baby, and then we're together. I've been wondering that since we broke up."

She carefully sat next to him, extended her legs, and crossed them at the ankles. "I'm pretty sure I told you to take some time for yourself and leave romance out of your relationships for a while. You lasted about two months." She forced herself to sit on her hands so she wouldn't pick at the polish. "I should have been stronger. I should have told you no when you made that perfect declaration, but I didn't want to. I was finally being offered what I had wanted for years." She shrugged. "Like I said, Amelia or no Amelia – my feelings are the same." She stared at her feet and willed herself not to cry. "I've always wondered if you were only with me because you wanted her to have a mother."

He shook his head. "That's not the reason." He reached into the interior pocket of his suit jacket and pulled out a small stack of photos. "After I saw you at the church, I grabbed these. I wasn't sure if I would see you, but if I did, I wanted you to have them." He watched as she flipped through the photos of her and Amelia. "You were really good to her. And I know you love her. Watching you with her gave me a sense of peace. I knew if we made things work, and something happened to me, you would care for her and love her like she was yours. But I was with you because I wanted to be. I've always had feelings for you. This time we were both single, and we were spending so much time together. I just thought it was finally the right time."

"Thank you for these."

"I'll put them back in my pocket till you leave if you'd like." She nodded and handed them to him. He put the photos back in the pocket, and then dropped his head against the wall. "What we had was good, Mac. It had the potential to turn into something amazing. I'll never understand how you just ended it."

She stiffened and was quiet for a long moment before responding. "I'll never understand how you didn't even give coming with me a minutes thought before telling me no." She met his eyes and shrugged. "I thought what we had was amazing. And I ask you to come with me, and it's an immediate no. Not 'let me think about it', or 'can we talk about it later'. I ask you to come with me, and the first words out of your mouth are 'I can't go with you'." She freed her hands and rubbed them over her arms. "You broke my heart, Harm."

"You broke mine. I just needed time, Mac. I would have been ready eventually." He winced at how that sounded. "I wasn't asking for an eternity. I just needed some time."

"Long distance is hard under the best circumstances. It would have been a disaster with us. Especially with my insecurity and your jealousy, our demanding jobs, and an eight-month old baby."

"We could have tried." His voice was quiet, and the tone made her sad. "We'll never know if it could have worked."

"I know."

"Mr. Rabb? Are you up there?"

Harm had been staring at her profile and jerked. He shifted and leaned to look over the edge. "I'm up here Jeff."

"Sorry to bother you sir, but your mama sent me to come get you. There are some people starting to leave, and she wants you to come say goodbye."

Harm glanced at his watch. They had been away for over an hour. "I'll be right there." They stayed seated as the door closed behind Jeff, and Harm stood. "I guess I need to get back."

Mac nodded. "I should get going."

"Are you flying back tonight?"

She shook her head. "I'm staying in Washington with Maddie tonight. I'm flying back in the morning."

He nodded and began climbing down the ladder. She followed him and took the shoes he handed her once she was on the ground. She slid them back on and they began their walk back to the house. The walk was silent until the reached the house. She shifted away from him and began walking towards a blue SUV. He followed her and pulled the photos of his pocket and handed them to her. She reached through the window and placed them on the passenger seat. "Are your keys inside?"

"No, they're in the glove compartment." She shrugged. "The woman I parked beside did the same thing, so I figured it was safe." She opened the door and turned back to him. "I really am sorry about your grandmother, Harm. I wish I'd gotten to meet her."

He tried to swallow the lump in his throat. "I wish you had too. She always wanted to meet you." He swallowed again. "Drive safely."

She slid into the seat and nodded. "I will. Kiss Amelia for me."

"I will." He pushed her door shut and stepped back. "Bye Mac."

"Bye Harm." She started the car and carefully pulled out of her spot. She looked in the mirror and saw him standing there watching her. She drove for five miles before pulling over into a drugstore parking lot where she began to cry.

**End Part 13**


	14. Chapter 14

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Fourteen**

**Two Weeks Later **

**Thursday**

Harm smiled at Claire as she pulled into the parking spot next to his. He got out of the car, and went around to the back to unstrap Amelia from her car-seat. They had gotten into the habit at meeting at a rest area in Fredericksburg, halfway between their homes, whenever Claire wanted to take Amelia for the night. Claire turned off her car and hurried over to help him. He passed her the baby, while he grabbed the diaper bag and the overnight bag he had packed. He smiled as Claire covered her niece in kisses, making her laugh, and he put the bags in the trunk.

"It's a whole weekend this time. Are you sure you and Jamie are up for this?"

"Absolutely." Claire secured Amelia in the car-seat in the back of her own car and then turned back to him. "I can't thank you enough for letting me have her this weekend."

He nodded, and shoved his hands in his pockets. Claire had called last week and asked if she could have Amelia for the weekend. Saturday would have been Claudia's birthday, and she had been missing her sister and niece desperately. Harm had been floored - Saturday was his birthday as well. But he didn't have the heart to tell her that, and to disappoint her by saying no. He figured he'd have a lifetime of birthdays and holidays with Amelia. He could give up this one. "Do you not have classes tomorrow, or are you skipping them?"

Claire blushed, and looked at her feet. "I only have one on Fridays, but I'm skipping it this week. It's just a review session for a test next week, and I'm pretty confident already." Harm raised an eyebrow, and Claire smirked. "Was this that big-brotherly thing Mac warned about when I first met her?" He paled, and her smile faded. "Oh, Harm. I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "Don't worry about it."

"No, really. I'm sorry." She put her hand on his forearm and squeezed gently. "I didn't mean to bring her up."

He placed his hand over hers for a moment. "It really is okay, Claire. One of these days I'm actually going to have to start moving on."

She shrugged. "Or you could fly out to San Diego, take her in your arms and tell her you are crazy in love with her and were a fool to let her go."

He raised an eyebrow, and then shook his head. "I think you need to lay off the romance novels." She laughed and he smiled. "You guys have a good weekend." He leaned into the back seat and kissed Amelia's forehead. "Bye Sweetheart. Daddy loves you." He kissed her again and stood up straight. "I'll see you guys Sunday."

* * *

**Friday**

Harm walked into the apartment and dropped his keys on the table. He sorted the mail he had picked up, and then slid it all into his recycling bin. The apartment was too quiet. It was too clean. Toys weren't scattered all over the living room, and there wasn't a collection of bottles on the draining rack by the sink. He eyed the TV for a moment, before deciding he needed to get out of this apartment. He quickly changed into jeans and a black long-sleeved t-shirt. There was a bar a few blocks over that had live music every Friday, and he figured that beat sitting in this empty apartment.

He decided to drive, just as a way to ensure he didn't have too much to drink, and found a parking spot one street over. The bar was already pretty busy, especially considering it was barely 6:00, and he took a seat at the bar. The bartender was an older guy, and greeted him with a friendly smile and sat a coaster in front of him.

"What can I get you?"

"Any IPAs on draft?"

The bartender nodded. "A fairly local one. It's brewed in Norfolk. Pretty good though."

Harm nodded. "I'll have a tall one, please." The bartender poured the beer, and sat it on the coaster. He looked over Harm's shoulder as the door opened and smiled broadly. Harm grinned into his beer. He would bet anything that a beautiful woman had just walked in. Sure enough one had, and she took the seat next to him. He watched her in the mirror hanging behind the bar. She was definitely beautiful. She wore a sleek black suit, and her blonde hair had been pulled back into a low ponytail. He smiled into the beer as the bartender greeted her warmly, and leaned forward to take her order.

A minute later he had placed a gin and tonic on her coaster, and winked as he told her he had used the good tonic water she liked. The woman blushed as he walked away, and took a sip of her drink. She noticed Harm for the first time and smiled. "I come here a lot. The service is usually pretty good."

He grinned and took another sip of his beer. "I don't think being a regular is what gets you the good service." She blushed again, and he swiveled on the stool to face her. "I'm Harm."

She smiled and extended her hand. "Elise." They shook, and then she turned her attention back to her drink. She stabbed the lime with the plastic stick, and then stirred the drink. "Are you here alone?" He nodded, and she looked back at her drink. "So why are you drinking alone on a Friday night?"

He took a deep breath, and picked at the coaster. "I didn't have any better options."

Elise slowly gave him the once over. "I have a hard time believing that."

Harm shrugged. "When you're in your thirties and single, it gets harder to find people to come out with on the weekends. Everyone has plans or family obligations. So, my options are to watch whatever nonsense is on TV in my quiet apartment, or come here for a drink and to listen to music." She cocked her head to the side, and looked thoughtful. "Why are you here drinking alone on a Friday night?"

She sighed so loudly it almost felt exaggerated. She stared at the lime wedge in her glass and was quiet for so long he thought she wouldn't answer. Finally, she spoke. "Have you ever had one of those days- "

"Yes."

She laughed and he grinned. "You don't even know what kind of day I've had."

"I'm a lawyer. Believe me, I think I've had every type of day there is."

She studied him again. "Have you ever had one of those days where you realize your career is not what you thought it would be?"

He smiled. "I was supposed to be a fighter pilot. I was for a while." Her eyes widened and he continued. "Being a lawyer was never my plan, so I've definitely had those days."

"Why are you not a pilot?"

"It's a long, complicated story." He sipped the beer and felt her watching him. "So, why isn't your career what you thought it would be?"

Her eyes remained on him for a minute, and he knew she wanted to ask more about his story. Finally, she pushed her drink away and leaned her forearms on the bar. "I got my graphic design degree to work in marketing. I wanted to design smart and sexy ad campaigns. But along the way everyone kept telling me I would make more money and get better clients if I got my MBA. So, I did. And now I haven't created anything in ages. Instead I'm managing artistic twenty-two-year olds with purple hair, while I'm stuck wearing suits."

He frowned and pushed his own beer away. "Why not go down the ladder then? Go back to doing what you enjoy?"

She scoffed. "Because getting the MBA added about $75,000 to my student loans, and I need to make good money to pay those off. The fun jobs don't even come close." She picked up her drink and took a long swig. "So, for now I'm stuck making good money doing something I hate. And drinking here every Friday night." She drained the rest of her glass and glanced at his nearly empty one. "Another drink?"

* * *

Elise placed her hand on his knee and eyed his empty glass. "Another drink?"

He glanced at her hand and then shook his head. "I better not. Two is my limit when I'm driving."

She inched her hand up his leg, and gave him an alluring smile. "Don't drive then. Come back to my place. It's only about a five-minute walk from here."

He felt all of his blood rush to his groin, and he placed his hand over hers. "Most women usually buy me dinner before I go home with them."

Her smile widened. "If you're hungry later we can have pizza in bed. What do you say?"

He looked up and caught the eye of the bartender and gestured for their check.

She hadn't been exaggerating. Her place was only about a five-minute walk, and was in a gorgeous historic ivy-covered building. She unlocked the door, and they went inside. She hung her keys and purse on the hook by the door, and toed out of her heels. He grinned as she literally shrank four inches in front of him. She unbuttoned her suit jacket and tossed it on the sofa before turning to face him. The pale pink camisole she had on left little to the imagination, and his palms itched to touch the silky fabric. She moved closer to him, placed a hand on his neck and tugged him down for a kiss. After a moment she pulled back and grinned. "Maybe I should put my shoes back on."

He smiled and let her kiss him again. He opened his mouth to the kiss, and tried to force his brain to shut down for a little while. He gave into his desire to touch her, and ran his hands over her sides and then beneath her top. Her skin was as soft as the camisole was, and she moaned into his mouth.

She pulled back again and moved her hands to cover his belt. "Do you have any condoms?"

He froze, and then slowly shook his head. "No, I don't. I'm sorry. I wasn't really planning on going home with anyone tonight."

She studied him for a second and bit her lip. "I'm on the pill, so we should be okay." She leaned up to kiss him again, and her fingers tugged the belt from his pants.

The noise the buckle made as it hit the floor was loud and jarring. He felt her fingers working the button and zipper on his jeans. What the hell was he doing? He thought of a similar night in Florida with Claudia, and then flashed back to the day at the office where he had told Mac that he was done with casual sex.

Mac. Thinking of her had the same result as he imagined a bucket of ice water over the head would have, and he gently pushed Elise back. "I'm sorry, I can't do this."

Her mouth was swollen from their kisses, and her hair had come loose from the pony tail. She frowned as he stepped away from her and buttoned his jeans and picked up the belt. "What's going on?"

He shook his head and threaded the belt through the loops. "I just can't do this."

Her eyes darted to his left hand, and then back to his face. "You're not married, are you?"

He shook his head again, and shoved his hands in his pockets. "No, but…" He ran a hand through his hair and sat down on the edge of her sofa. "I'm not married. I recently got out of a pretty serious relationship, and I'm just not as ready to move on as I thought I was."

Her frown softened, and she sat next to him on the couch. "How long has it been?"

"About two months. We worked together, and she got a really great job offer in San Diego. She wanted me to go with her, but I wasn't ready for that big of a step, so I said no. She broke up with me and here we are." He shrugged and leaned back for a second before standing. "I'm really sorry about this."

She waved his apology away. "Don't worry about it." She watched him walk to the door and stopped him. "Do you love her?"

He froze with his hand on the knob. A lot of people had asked him that over the past two months. His answer had always been some variation of 'I don't know, but I would have eventually.' But he did know. Once the anger had dissipated, the answer had been so obvious. "Yes."

Elise stood and made her way to him. She placed a hand on his arm and he turned to face her. "Then what the hell are you doing? Life is short, Harm. If you love her, you should be with her."

He leaned in, and placed a quick kiss on her cheek. "Thanks, Elise." He opened the door and smiled one last time before he hurried back to where he had left his car.

* * *

Harm had never been so thankful for time zones in his life. It had been almost 8:00 when he walked into Dulles International Airport and frantically booked an open-ended flight to San Diego. Now five hours later it was just after 10:30 on the West Coast, and he was standing at the airport curb trying to hail a cab. He couldn't believe he had done this - he never did things like this. He hadn't even packed a bag. He had left Elise's apartment and headed straight for the airport.

A cab stopped, and he hopped inside. "Where to?"

He looked at the cab driver as if he were speaking another language. Where to? He had no idea. He didn't know Mac's address, or what even what part of town she lived in. He opened the cab door, and stepped back out. "I'm sorry. I have no idea." The cab driver made a rude gesture, and went down the curb to pick up someone else. He briefly thought about who to call, and winced as he realized he only had one option and dialed a familiar number. The phone rang four times before it was finally answered.

"What."

"Sir, I am so sorry to call this late."

"Then why did you?" AJ Chegwidden rubbed his hand over his eyes and sat up.

"Sir, I was wondering if there was anyway you could give me Colonel MacKenzie's new address in San Diego." The other end of the line was silent, and Harm pulled the phone away from his ear to check if they'd been disconnected. "Sir?"

"You woke me up at one o'clock in the morning to ask for an address? This isn't something that could wait for a more reasonable hour?"

Ham swallowed nervously. He knew he had to be completely honest. "No, sir. It couldn't wait. I took a last-minute flight to San Diego, and I just got off the plane. I didn't realize that I didn't have it until the cab driver asked where we were going."

The line went quiet again for a moment, and then the only sound was paper rustling. "Do you have a pen?"

Harm winced. "No, sir. Hold on one second, please." He hurried over to a middle-aged couple nearby. She had one of those purses like his mother preferred, and he knew that the odds were good she'd have a pen. "I'm sorry to bother you, but do you have a pen I can borrow for just a moment?" The woman smiled pleasantly, and opened her bag. She rifled through the contents for a moment, before handing him a very large purple pen with a bobbling unicorn on the end. He grabbed the boarding pass from his back pocket. "I've got a pen, sir." He wrote down the address and returned the pen to the woman.

"Harm?"

"Yes, Admiral?"

"Do you know what you're doing?"

He took a breath. "Not really, no."

"Good luck, son."

They both hung up and Harm smiled at the couple. "Thanks for the pen." He hurried back to the curb and hailed another cab. One pulled up immediately, and Harm recited the address he had written down.

Mac's new apartment wasn't too far from the airport and was in a really nice part of town. The cab stopped in front of a sleek high-rise building, and he quickly paid and went inside. He made his way over to the elevators and stopped when he recognized the security pad by the up and down buttons. It was the same type of pad that was on the front of his building, and on his front door, and that could only be opened by a resident's key fob. "Shit." He turned and walked to a security desk. The officer was male, but looked friendly enough. Harm smile politely. "Hello. I'm trying to get up to my friend's apartment."

"Are you on her guest list?"

He frowned, knowing he probably wouldn't be. "No, she's not expecting me."

"What's the name? I'll call and get verbal confirmation that it's okay for you to go up?"

Harm blushed. "I was sort of hoping to surprise her. I just flew in from DC."

The security guard cocked his head to the side. "Sir, I can't let you up if you're not on the list, or if she hasn't said it's okay."

He sighed. "I understand. My name is Harm Rabb. I'm here to see Sarah MacKenzie" He waited as the security guard checked a list, and then dialed a number. He hung up without speaking, and offered Harm a sympathetic look.

"There was no answer." Harm tensed and checked his watch. 11:00. Where was she at 11:00? Was she on a date? Would she be home tonight? Would she walk into this lobby shortly with another man? The security guard smiled slightly. "You're welcome to wait here in the lobby."

Harm glanced at his watch again, and then looked around the lobby. There were modern leather sofas arranged in seating clusters. He nodded at the guard and walked over to a sofa near the elevator. He picked up a copy of Newsweek and began to flip through it. After a few minutes of flipping, he heard the guard clear his throat. He looked up and the guard gestured to the door with his head. Mac was walking toward the door, and he now understood what it meant to have your breath taken away. She looked incredible in an emerald green dress. The dress had a plunging v-neckline, dainty straps, a fitted bodice and a flowing skirt that fell to a few inches below her knees. He stood as she entered, and watched as she smiled at the guard and turned to the elevators. She noticed him almost instantly and stumbled as she came to a stop. He moved closer to her.

"What-" She moved her eyes over him and her tongue darted out to moisten her lips. "What are you doing here?"

He took another step toward her and reached for one of her hands. "I'm here because of you. I'm here because I'm in love with you."

**End Part 14**


	15. Chapter 15

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Part Fifteen**

They stared at each other in silence. She couldn't believe he was here. Standing in the lobby of her apartment building. And that he loved her.

He couldn't believe how easily he had said it. He had never said those words to a woman before. Well, a woman unrelated to him. He squeezed her hand and stepped closer. "I love you." The words came easily, and he grinned. It felt good to say them. It felt good to feel them.

"Harm." Her voice was soft, and he detected a bit of uncertainty. He watched as she opened and closed her mouth, before finally tugging her hand away and using it to brush her hair off of her face. "Come up to my apartment so we can talk." She began walking to the elevators, and he hurried after her. The ride up to her floor was silent, and he followed her to her door. He watched as she rifled through her small handbag for the key, and then as she waved a fob that looked like his over the small pad. "Come on in." She walked inside and held the door open for him.

He grinned as he took in the décor. Her traditional style didn't really go with the sleek and modern apartment, and she obviously didn't care. She slipped out of the heels she was wearing and walked barefoot to the kitchen and filled the kettle. "Tea?"

"No thank you." She was wearing her hair in soft curls, and he wanted more than anything to tangle his fingers in it. The dress she was wearing screamed date. As did those ridiculously high heels. Had another man already run his fingers through her hair? If he took her in his arms and breathed in her scent, would he smell a masculine fragrance on top of her coconut shampoo and citrusy perfume? "Did you have a date tonight?" She stopped moving and turned to face him, and he blushed. "You look amazing in that dress. It looks like a date dress."

She crossed her arms over her chest and stared at him. "How would you know what I wear on a date? We never had a real one."

He frowned. "That's not true."

"It is. We were only together a month, Harm. And every night we spent together was with Amelia at your place. I'm not complaining. I love that child as if she were my own. But we never went out." She waved a hand at her body. "That didn't give me a lot of chances to dress up."

He swallowed hard, and thought back to their month. She was absolutely right. He had cooked for them most nights, and the nights he didn't cook they had ordered in. He was an idiot. "So, you were on a date?"

The kettle started whistling, and she pulled it off the burner. She filled her cup slowly, and then turned back to him. "No, I wasn't on a date. I was at a birthday dinner for a friend from my yoga class." She leaned against the counter and cupped the mug with both hands. "There hasn't been anyone since you."

He moved into the kitchen to be closer to her, and stopped when he noticed a photograph on the fridge. It was one of the ones he had given her of Amelia, and he smiled softly.

Mac watched him and nervously gnawed on her lip. "Is she here? In San Diego, I mean."

He shook his head. "No, she's in Charlottesville with Claire." Mac nodded and turned her attention back to the tea. "Since when do you do yoga?"

"Since moving here. I wanted to try something different." She sipped the tea and watched him over the mug. He was typically a man who could fill an entire room with his confidence, and she didn't think she had ever seen him so uneasy. "So, you love me?"

Harm nodded, and moved closer to her. "I do."

"And you just realized this tonight?" He nodded and she studied him. "What made you realize it?" He winced, and she moved away from him and pulled out one of the bar stools.

"Tonight, I was bored. I was lonely. The apartment was so quiet without Amelia. So, I went to a bar a few blocks over to listen to live music. I met a woman there." She flinched, and seeing the hurt in her eyes, he took a deep breath. "I'm not telling you this to hurt you. I'm just being honest. I need to be honest with you." He reached across the counter for one of her hands, but she pulled both back and tucked them in her lap. "I was at the bar having a drink when she came in, and took the seat next to me. We talked and had a couple of drinks, and then she asked me back to her place."

Mac hopped off the bar stool and began to pace. "Do you actually love me, or is flying out here in the middle of the night to tell me this just some insane, over the top way to hurt me and pay me back for breaking up with you?"

He moved to her and pulled her to him. His hands were gentle, but firm, and he held her in place. "Stop it. I never want to hurt you. Ever. I hate telling you this, but it's important that I do. I didn't go to bed with her. We didn't do anything more than kiss."

She blinked back tears and forced herself to look at him. "What stopped you?"

"You." His tongue darted out to moisten his lips, and he moved one hand from her arm to cup her face. "The thought of you stopped everything instantly." He stroked her cheekbone with thumb and offered her a tentative smile. I had already been wondering what the hell I was doing. And then I thought of that day in your office when I proclaimed that I was done with casual sex. You were sitting on the floor, surrounded by files, and you teased me about that being no fun." His smile widened at the memory, and then he shook his head. "As soon as you popped into my head, I was done. It was as if someone doused me with ice water. I told her I couldn't do it, and she asked why. I told her I had just gotten out of a serious relationship, and wasn't as ready to move on as I thought." He moved his hand from her cheek to her neck. "She asked me if I loved you, and the answer was yes." He took a breath and a moment to study her. Her eyes were wide and wet, her cheeks were pink, and he had never seen anything as beautiful in his life.

"A lot of people have asked me if I loved you over the past two months. My mom, Grams, Sturgis, Jack, Webb, Claire, Lily." He shrugged. "Everyone asked, and my answer was always more or less the same – I don't know, but I know I would have if we had more time. But after the funeral, I stopped being so angry about what happened between us. And tonight was the first time I've been asked that when all of my feelings weren't buried under thick layers of anger." He could feel her pulse beating from beneath his hand, and he squeezed gently. "So, I left her apartment, went to Dulles and got on the first flight to San Diego. I had to see you, I had to tell you, and I had to ask you for a second chance."

"Harm- "

"I love you."

She pulled away from him, and wrapped her arms around her middle. "I love you too. I always have. But this doesn't change anything. You're still in Washington, and I'm here. We're both- "

He moved to her again. "I'm going to ask for orders here. As soon as I get back." Her eyes widened, and he smiled. "I love you. I want to be with you. If that means doing wills and powers of attorney for a few years, then so be it. I'll have my turn for a command someday. But now, it's your turn." She was chewing on her bottom lip, and anxiety was all over her face. "Give us another chance, Mac. Please."

"Harm…" She trailed off and took a breath. She was scared to give them another chance. She had been devastated when it ended, and part of her didn't know if she could, or wanted to, go through that again. But once again she had the man of her dreams standing in front of her and making the most perfect declaration. How could she ever say no? "It'll have to be different this time." He nodded, but she ignored him. "I love Amelia. You know that I do. But I wanted us to be a family so badly, I was content just to be with the two of you. We were so busy playing house and parenting her that we never had a chance to just be a couple, and I think that we need that. We need to go on dates and spend some time together alone."

"I know." He finally gave into the temptation to run his fingers through the loose curls. "We'll be better at this whole relationship thing this time."

"How can you be sure?"

He smiled and let her dark hair fall from his hand. "Because we know what it's like to be together, and we know what it's like to not be together. And not being together is horrible. We'll make it work this time."

She took a deep breath and tried to ignore how shaky it was. "Okay."

"Okay?" He repeated, making sure he had heard her correctly.

"Okay." Her voice was louder this time, more confident. And he grinned broadly before lowering his lips to hers.

* * *

"How is this going to work?" She was curled into his side with her head on his chest, and his hand was lazily moving up and down her arm. The thick duvet and extra pillows had been kicked to the floor, and the white sheet was twisted around their bodies.

"How is what going to work?"

She lifted her head, and propped herself up an on elbow. "This." She gestured at their bodies. "Us. We don't know how long it'll take you to get orders. When will we see each other?"

He looked at her and smiled. "The Admiral knows I'm here. I called him when my plane landed, since I realized I had no idea where you lived. I'm sure he'll help if he can." He shifted, and tucked one arm behind his head. "But for now, we'll see each other whenever we can. I hate that Halloween is on a weekday this year. I'd love for you to come to Washington and go trick-or-treating with us."

Mac softened, and lowered her head back to his chest. "What's Amelia going as?"

"The most cliché baby costume ever: a pumpkin. But, that's what both of my parents were for their first Halloweens, and it's what I was too." He glanced at her and tugged at a strand of hair. "Maybe come for Veterans Day weekend? I'm assuming you still get the day off."

She nodded, then bit her lip, and busied herself by playing with his chest hair. "Are you sure? You told me that she took my leaving hard. Is it fair for her for me to come around and leave constantly? She's a baby, she doesn't understand any of this."

He placed a kiss on the top of her head. "Honestly, I don't know. I just know I want her surrounded with people she loves and who love her. Just come. If this visit is too hard on her, we'll play future visits by ear."

"Okay." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "And I guess you're coming here for Thanksgiving?"

He nodded. "I am. Mom and Frank are coming to me for Christmas. Will you come too?"

"Yes."

He grinned, and maneuvered them so that her body was on top of his. "See? We already have three visits planned. And that's just the minimum. We'll make this work, okay? I promise."

She pulled herself up to a sitting position, and straddled his torso. She couldn't help but smile as his eyes moved to her bare breasts and clouded over with lust. "Don't make a promise you can't keep."

"I haven't yet."

* * *

He slid out of bed the next morning, and looked around the room for a clock. He finally spotted an alarm clock on the other side of the room and squinted. 7:30. He pulled on his discarded boxers from the night before and walked quietly into the living room. His wallet and cellphone were on the kitchen counter, and he flipped open the phone and dialed a familiar number.

"It's about time you called."

Harm grinned at the sound of Claire's cheerful voice and Amelia's gibberish in the background. "And good morning to you too."

"Harm, it's 10:30. We've been up so long it's practically the middle of the day. Are you okay? Usually when I have her overnight you call first thing."

"I'm good. I took your advice last night and flew out to San Diego, It's 7:30 here." He had to pull the phone away from his ear as Claire let out an ear-piercing squeal. "How's Amelia?"

"No. No way. I want details."

He scoffed. "You are absolutely not getting them. But we talked, and we're going to try again."

"Are you moving out there?"

His smile faded slightly. He hadn't thought about how a move to the West Coast would affect Claire. He had thought about Mac, and being closer to his parents. But hadn't thought about the fact that Amelia would now be much farther away than a two-hour drive. "I am. I haven't put in for a new assignment yet, so it might take a while. But yeah."

She was quiet for a minute, and then cleared her throat. "Good. I'm glad."

"Claire- "

"Harm, don't worry about me. Don't feel guilty about this. I'll come visit and, she can come visit me. When she's older, I'd love it if she could come stay with me for a week or two. Not to mention, I'm not going to be here forever. Jamie and I are at UVA because I wanted to go here. For post-grad, I told him we can go to whatever part of the country he wants. And he has his heart set on Boston."

"Like I said at the very beginning, you'll always have a place in her life."

"I know." Claire beamed at the little girl sitting next to her. "I didn't really believe you, you know."

"I know." He smiled and shook his head. "Listen, the reason I called is to figure out when to pick her up. I booked an open-ended flight so I could come straight home if Mac shot me down. Do you mind if I come a little later on Sunday than planned?"

"That's fine. Get the absolute latest flight possible and spend as much time as you can with Mac. We'll be here."

"Thank you, Claire. I really appreciate it. So, what are you guys doing today?"

"Anytime." She smiled, and pulled her legs up onto the couch. "We're going to visit Claudia's grave, and then Jamie and I are taking Amelia to an apple orchard. She's too young to enjoy the apples or the apple donuts, but they have a ton of activities for kids. My parents took us there every single October when we were little. And thanks again for letting me have her this weekend."

"I miss her, but I know this is important to you. I do have a confession to make." He laughed lightly, and was little nervous to tell her this. "I wasn't going to tell you, but now that I'm out here I feel more comfortable doing it. Today is my birthday too."

Claire gasped, and dropped her legs back to the floor. "Why didn't you tell me? Oh, Harm. I feel terrible."

"Don't." He glanced at the photo of Amelia on Mac's fridge. "You never ask for anything, Claire and I wouldn't even know she existed if it weren't for you. She and I will have a lifetime of birthdays and holidays. I just thought it was really interesting that Claudia and I had the same birthday."

"Yeah, that's really crazy." She ran her hand over Amelia's head and felt a rush of gratitude that her father had turned out to be such a kind and generous man. During the weeks after her sister's death, some of her worst nightmares had included handing this perfect child over to someone who turned out to be a complete asshole. "Thanks for this weekend. It means even more to me now."

"You're welcome." They were both silent for a moment and he cleared his throat. "I guess I'll let you get back to your day. Give Amelia a kiss for me, please."

"I will. Tell Mac I said hi, and that I'm so happy about this."

"I will." He hung up the phone and headed back to Mac's bedroom. He pulled off the boxers and climbed back in bed. Instantly she curled into him, and his arms went around her.

"Everything okay?"

He remembered how much he loved waking up next to her. They hadn't spent the night together often before, and he regretted that now. Morning Mac had become one of his favorite sides of her. Her voice was thick with sleep, and she was less guarded and more affectionate. "Everything is good. I just needed to check in with Claire. She says hi, by the way."

She lifted her head slightly and opened her eyes before immediately closing them. They had neglected to pull the curtains closed the night before, and the room was much too bright. She opened her eyes slowly, keeping them narrowed this time. "What did she say when you told her where you were?"

He kissed the top of her head. "Oh, you didn't hear that squealing sound she made all the way in here?" He could feel her smile into his chest and grinned. "I also told her that Claudia and I have the same birthday, now that I know she can't just pack my kid up and bring her back to me out of some sense of guilt."

Mac sat up quickly, and opened her eyes all the way. "It's your birthday. I forgot-"

He waved her off. "We were broken up until about eight hours ago. I didn't expect you to remember."

She shook her head. "No, I remembered." She bit her lower lip, and leaned over him to open the nightstand drawer. She finally pulled out a blue envelope and hesitantly handed it to him. He turned it over in his hands and saw his name and address on the front. "I was going to say I forgot to mail it."

Harm smiled and studied her neat handwriting. "Should I open it now?" She nodded and he tore open the flap. The card had a simple design, which she had always preferred. The front only said '_To My Friend_'. His eyes skimmed over the generic happy birthday message printed on the gray cardstock and fell on her personal message. '_Harm- I feel silly sending you this. I keep picturing you seeing my name on the return address label and throwing it in the garbage. But I just can't not wish you a happy birthday. I know the past year has had so many ups and downs. I really hope the coming year brings you nothing but ups. You really do deserve everything good in this world. Happy Birthday._' He tucked the card back into the envelope and pulled her to him. "Thirty-seven is off to a really good start so far."

**End Part 15**


	16. Chapter 16

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes**: I'm honestly sorry it's taken so long to update this (and my other in-progress story). But after the NCIS episode I've been so angry with the series, the characters, the actors, etc. that I couldn't fathom spending time writing fanfiction. I'm angry that they couldn't have left well enough alone. I'm angry that they blew up the relationship that we waited nine years for, for three episodes of a completely different series. It felt like such a monumental slap in the face.

Anyway. My husband and I are in the process of moving, and I was packing up some stuff in my office the other day and found the notepad with my outlines in it. I spent about two hours reading, and I realized how much I missed this, and decided that maybe immersing myself in the JAG world that I created may help me forget about that travesty.

**Part Sixteen**

_**Monday Morning**_

"Commander Rabb is here to see you sir."

Admiral Chegwidden pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. "Send him in, Tiner." He closed the massive budget binder and pushed it aside. He had been hoping for a distraction ever since he opened the binder an hour earlier – just not this particular distraction. He watched the door open, and Rabb walk into the office, and instantly knew that the impromptu visit to California had gone well. He was no longer morose, and instead looked like the man he had been before Mac had left. "Have a seat, Commander." He waited as Harm sat, and both men were silent for a long moment. AJ sighed, and leaned back in his chair. "What's going on?"

Harm cleared his throat. "Sir, I'd like to look into a transfer to San Diego." He paused and waited for some type of reaction, but none came. "I know this is unexpected-"

AJ snorted, and sat up straight. "Son, this is the exact opposite of unexpected. I'm just not sure what you're wanting from me. I'm not exactly a personnel office."

Harm blushed, and folded his hands in his lap. "I know, sir. I just-" He sighed. "I just know it's going to take a while to get orders on my own. I've only been back here for a little over a year, and I'm not exactly the SECNAV's favorite officer. I was hoping you might have a way to help."

"What's the hurry? Trial attorney and investigative positions are hard to come by. Are you willing to leave this position for one that I know you'll consider beneath you and your abilities?"

Harm winced. "I am, sir." He unclasped his hands and shrugged lightly. "I've learned there are more important things than the exciting cases. Like my family." He didn't mention Mac's name, not feeling entirely comfortable talking about her with his commanding officer any more than necessary. "As you know, my parents are in San Diego. Since my grandmother's death, I feel a pull to spend more time with them. And of course, there's Amelia. The cases I'm assigned are always interesting, but they take me out of town frequently, and I'm missing important milestones with her." He was silent for a moment, and then sighed. _'To hell with it.'_ He cleared his throat. "And she's there."

AJ took a deep breath. He thought about the brief conversation he had with Mac after giving her the new assignment. "Can I speak to you as a friend?" Harm nodded, and he leaned forward. "Dual military relationships can be challenging. Are you really ready for that? Will you be happy having a theoretically less interesting job than hers? Do you think she'll be willing to take a step back in a couple of years when your opportunity comes?"

He simply nodded. "You know, if you had asked me that a year ago, or even a couple of months ago, my answer may have been different. But my priorities have shifted over the past year, and for the first time in my life I'm ready to put my family ahead of my career. And yes. I know she'll take a back seat for me at some point in the future."

AJ smiled. "It may take some time, but I'll do everything I can to help." Harm grinned, and started to stand. "One more thing." He glanced at the photo of Francesca that sat on a nearby shelf, and then returned his attention to Harm. "People are going to constantly tell you that time goes too fast, and to treasure every moment. And they're absolutely right. My biggest regret in life will always be not putting my family, especially my daughter, first. I'm pleased to see you're not heading down that same path."

"No, sir. I'm not."

"Good." He cleared his throat and placed a hand on the budget binder. "Is there anything else, Commander?"

Harm stood quickly and shook his head. "No, sir."

* * *

_**Halloween Night **_

Harm tapped a pen on the desk as he stared at the clock. He had never been more ready to leave the office for the day in his entire life. He had never really been big on holidays – any holiday. But he was excited for tonight. Sturgis had wasted no time meeting someone, and had gotten pretty serious with Bobbi Latham. And Bobbi had surprised them all with tickets to the White House Trick or Treat event for military children. He and Amelia were going with the Roberts family, and he couldn't wait to get home and get her ready. Lily had offered to have her in her pumpkin costume by the time he got home, but he was adamant that he would be the one to get her dressed for her first major holiday.

If only Mac, Claire, and his parents were here to see her, but he had promised all of them that he would take plenty of photos and he'd even bring the costume with him to San Diego for Thanksgiving if they'd like.

Finally, the clock moved from 4:59 to 5:00, and he jumped up, grabbed his things, and hurried out of the office. He was irrationally afraid that if he lingered someone would stop him, and put him to work. Traffic was light going home, which was a miracle in and of itself. He assumed all of the parents out there had left work early to get ready for tonight. He felt a little silly being so excited, knowing that Amelia was too young to remember any of this, but he couldn't help himself. He hurried up to the apartment, and grinned as soon as he stepped inside.

He had struck gold with Lily. She was a perfect nanny. She was responsible and dependable enough for him, yet fun and energetic enough for his daughter. She had obviously spent the day decorating his apartment, and the place was covered in fake cobwebs, pumpkins, and plastic bats even dangled from the ceiling. She stood at the counter feeding Amelia her dinner and smiled at him. "Since you wouldn't let me get her dressed up, I decided to dress up your apartment." She made a face at Amelia, and fed her another bite. "Although I did go ahead and put on her tights and the onesie. I thought long sleeved would be best."

Amelia turned her head as Lily offered her another bite, and held her arms up to her dad. His smile widened as he reached for her and lifted her into his arms. "Thanks for everything, Lily." He kissed Amelia's forehead, then reached for the spoon Lily was holding, and offered her another bite. "What are your big plans for the night?"

Lily shrugged and studied Harm and Amelia. If she were being completely honest, part of her had hoped he would invite her to spend the evening with them. She had told her roommate about him, and her crush on him, and was met with a combination laughing-choking fit. Her roommate had reminded her that she wasn't starring in a romantic-comedy, and this older, single dad was definitely not falling in love with his much younger nanny. Then he had gone and reunited with Mac, so what remained of that little fantasy went up in smoke. "Oh, nothing much. Wine and a few horror movies with some girlfriends."

He smiled, and put the spoon back into the nearly empty bowl. "I hope you have a great time. You can go ahead and head out if you need to."

She shook her head, and took the bowl and spoon to the sink. "I can hang out for a while. If you want to get her dressed, I'll take a few photos of both of you together before I head out."

He placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed. "Thanks Lily. I'll be right back." He sat Amelia down and disappeared into his bedroom. He came out a few minutes later in jeans and a long-sleeved black shirt. He grinned at his daughter as he picked her up again, and disappeared into the other bedroom.

She watched as he carried Amelia to her bedroom and smiled softly. He was a good dad. The doorbell rang, and she called out that she'd get it while walking to the door. There was a delivery man waiting, and he greeted her with a broad smile.

"Happy Halloween, ma'am. I have a delivery for a Miss Amelia Rabb. Can you sign?"

"Of course." She signed on the small line and took the package from him. "Have a nice evening."

"You too, ma'am." He hurried down the hall to the elevator, and then turned her attention to the package. It was from Mac. Of course, it was. She sat it on the island, and studied her handiwork in the apartment. It really did look nice. She was especially proud of the fireplace. She had made a banner that draped across the mantle, and it would make a perfect backdrop for photos of Harm and Amelia. She turned her attention back to the box and sighed. Her roommate was right, and she needed to get over this crush. He and Mac were perfect together.

"Hey Harm? You had a package delivered. I think it's from Mac."

"Okay." A few minutes later he and Amelia emerged from her room, and his smile was contagious. The baby looked ridiculously cute in the puffy orange pumpkin costume over the black tights and long-sleeved black onesie. She had the matching head piece on, but you could still see her blonde hair peeking out.

Lily grinned and reached for her, while gesturing to the package with her chin. "I think this is the cutest pumpkin I've ever seen."

Harm smiled broadly, and reached into his jeans for his pocket knife and sliced through the packing tape. He pulled a sheet of tissue paper out of the box and grinned when he saw the contents. Inside was a stuffed black cat with an orange collar that looked just like Claire and Jamie's cat, and a very nice cloth basket for trick or treating with her name embroidered on the front and a few small toys and board books were inside. He picked up the cat and the basket, and held out the cat to Amelia, who instantly reached for it.

* * *

Trick-or-treating had been a huge success. The children had been gifted small bags of candy, a bag of dried fruit, and beautifully decorated White House cookies. The kids were well behaved, and the line at the White House moved quickly enough that there weren't any meltdowns. Each family had gotten a quick photo with the President and First Lady, and then they were able to walk around and see the decorations before leaving. Both AJ and Amelia were too young for candy, so instead of visiting more houses, they all went out to dinner. It was way past Amelia's bedtime when they finally got home. She fell asleep in the car, and woke up long enough for him to get her inside and ready for bed. He changed from his jeans into pajama bottoms, and settled onto the sofa with the phone.

"Hello?"

Mac answered quickly, and Harm warmed at the sound of her voice. "Hey there."

"Hey."

He could hear the smile in her voice, and grinned. "Thanks for the package you sent Amelia. She immediately went for the cat."

Mac laughed, and dropped her book on the coffee table and pulled the throw over her. "I saw it and thought it looked exactly like Claire and Jamie's cat. How was your night?"

"Really good." He told her about the evening, and promised to get the photos that both he and Lily had taken developed in the morning. "I missed you tonight." She made a soft noise that sounded like a cross between a purr and a whimper, and felt himself harden. He cleared his throat. "What about you? Did you do anything festive?"

She laughed, and glanced at the witches hat she had dropped onto the island. "I handed out candy at the base trick-or-treating event. I found a flowy black dress in my closet and picked up a witch's hat at Target."

"Any pictures?" She laughed again, and he couldn't help but smile at the sound. He had missed this woman so much during their two-month break, and was so thankful that the long weekend for Veteran's Day was just a week away.

"Actually, yes. Erica, my assistant, and Alexandra, General Marsh's wife, were both dressed as witches too. Naturally the three of us took a few photos together. It was a good night, though. I'm glad I had something to do. I doubt my building gets very many trick-or-treaters."

Harm thought of the expensive building, and the lack of any child-friendly amenities. "Probably not." He pulled his long body off of the couch and went into his bedroom, closing the door behind him. He pulled off his pajama pants, and slid into the bed. "So, are you still wearing your costume?"

"Maybe. Maybe not." Her voice felt flirty, even to her own ears, and she couldn't help but blush. She had heard the door shut, and knew where this conversation was heading. "What are you wearing?"

"Not a damned thing."

"I guess I'm overdressed then." She secured the phone between her ear and shoulder and tugged down the shorts she had planned on sleeping in, before leaning back against the pillow.

* * *

**One Week Later – Thursday**

Mac stepped to the side of the busy airport and dug around in her handbag for the ringing cellphone. She flipped it open, and leaned against a wall. "Hello?"

"I just emailed you a list of flights that leave later tonight instead of in the morning. It's not too late to switch yours, you know."

"Harm -"

"I know you think it'll be late when you get in, but it'll be worth it not to have to give up any of our time together tomorrow."

"Harm." She glanced around the airport and grinned. "I'm actually at the airport right now. I was going to call you once I got to my gate and got settled."

"You're serious? You're heading out tonight?"

"I am." She pulled out the boarding pass and glanced at her arrival time. "I don't have any stops and should be there at 12:20 your time."

"I can't believe you're coming in tonight. I've been trying to talk you into this for a week, what changed your mind?"

She started walking again, keeping to the side so her slower pace wouldn't annoy too many people. "We literally had one case on the docket, since nothing was scheduled because of the holiday. And this morning the defendant decided to take the plea deal she was offered. With that done, General Marsh gave both legal divisions permission to leave after lunch. So, I hurried home to pack, changed my flight, and now here I am."

"God, I can't wait to see you."

His husky voice caused warmth to flood through her. She couldn't wait either. It hadn't even been an entire month since that perfect, spontaneous weekend they had spent together, but it felt like a lifetime. "I can't wait either. I've missed you, Harm. You and Amelia."

"I hate she'll be asleep when you get in." He frowned when he realized he couldn't exactly go to the airport to pick her up with. Unless he could convince someone to babysit for a few hours. "Mac, I- "

"Don't worry about picking me up. It's not feasible with Amelia. I've already arranged for a rental car."

He was silent for a moment. "I'm beginning to think you really are psychic. I was just trying to figure out how to make this work." She laughed, and he smiled. "Since you gave me back the key fob to my building and apartment, just call when you get to the gate. I can let you in from my phone. And same thing when you get to my building."

"I will." It was her turn to be silent, as she tried to settle her nerves. She couldn't wait to see him. She missed him, and their phone calls weren't nearly enough. She was nervous to see Amelia though. She remembered how Harm had told her she had taken her leaving hard. Would she remember her? Was any of this fair to her?

"Stop worrying, Mac. I'm sure Amelia will be fine."

"Now who's the psychic." She smiled as he laughed and she cleared her throat. "I should probably hop off here. My flight is boarding soon."

"Okay. Fly safe, Marine. I can't wait to see you soon."

"I will. Love you."

His smile widened. He didn't think he'd ever tire of hearing her say that she loved him. "I love you too."

* * *

Her flight was uneventful, but much too long. She had initially been happy to find a flight without a layover, but now she was wishing there had been one. She needed to walk around, to flip through magazines at the gift shop, to buy a pastry in the food court. Anything really that would help get rid of her nervous energy.

And now the flight was over and the passengers were all waiting to depart. Most were drowsy, having slept most of the flight. Some were exhausted. And she was going to go insane if she wasn't allowed to stand and get off of the plane soon.

"Do you mind?"

Mac turned at the voice and bit her lip. She had been bouncing her leg again. Her seatmate, a slightly older woman with sleek auburn hair pulled into a tight chignon and wearing a St. John suit that cost more than two month's rent, frowned at her. "I'm sorry." She stilled her movements and folded her hands in her lap.

The woman made a noise and reached into her giant leather handbag for a small mirror and a tube of lipstick. This woman looked entirely too put together and Mac felt rumpled. She wished she was one of those people who looked immaculate after a flight. She looked down at her black leggings, fur-lined boots and over-sized sweatshirt and wished she had taken more care with her appearance. She hadn't seen Harm in weeks, and this was what she wore for her flight? She momentarily thought about changing clothes in the bathroom once she retrieved her luggage, but talked herself out of it. It was cold here, it was late, and she just wanted to get to him. He wouldn't care that she wasn't in a nicer outfit.

After what seemed like an eternity, they were finally off of the plane, she had collected her bag from the luggage carousel and had picked up her rental car. Mac drove through the quiet city and made her way to Alexandria. And Harm. When she pulled up at the gate of his complex, she took a few deep breaths before calling him from the phone attached to the security keypad.

He answered quickly, not wanting the ringing phone to wake Amelia.

"Hey. I'm here." She waited in silence as the gate opened. "Okay. The gate is open. I'll call you again when I'm at your building." They hung up and she drove around the complex until she was in front of his building. She pulled into a guest spot, smoothed out her sweatshirt, and grabbed her things. She hurried to the front door and repeated the process. She heard the door unlock and she grabbed the handle before hanging up again. The elevator ride was the longest in history, and when it finally stopped on his floor, she took a deep breath. She stepped off the elevator, turned the corner, and saw him leaning against the wall next to his door.

He was a sight for sore eyes and was also dressed casually, in navy blue lounge pants and a simple white t-shirt. She quickened her pace and he started walking to meet her halfway. They came to a stop in front of one another. She sat her suitcase down and set her purse on top of it. He reached for her and pulled her close for a kiss that made her knees weak.

"I've missed you." He ran one hand through her hair, and slid another underneath her shirt. "I've missed you so much.

She leaned into him and buried her head in his neck. "God, I've missed you too." She let him hold her for a moment, and then pulled back to collect her things. He reached for the handle of her suitcase and she smiled. "Thanks."

"My pleasure. Ready for bed?"

Mac raised an eyebrow and walked with him to his apartment. "But I'm not tired."

He turned to face her and grinned. "I never said anything about going to sleep."

**End Part 16**


	17. Chapter 17

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes**: Thank you so much for all of the reviews!

**Part Seventeen**

She woke up to a kiss on her bare shoulder and babbling coming from the baby monitor. "I'm going to go get Amelia up and ready." His voice was thick with sleep and so devastatingly sexy.

Mac turned to face him and nodded. "Okay."

He tucked her hair behind an ear. "I'm sure it'll be okay." She nodded again and he kissed her gently before climbing out of bed and quickly dressing in the clothes he had worn the night before. She glanced at a framed photo of Amelia on the nightstand and took a deep breath. She pulled back on her own clothes from the night before and pulled a brush through her tousled hair. She sat on the edge of the bed and listened to the noises coming from the baby monitor. After a few minutes the noises stopped and the two of them appeared in the doorway of the bedroom.

Both watched Amelia as she studied Mac. Her reaction was neutral, which was both a relief and a slight disappointment. All of the books and parenting articles he had consulted said it was common for a child her age to forget people fairly quickly, but a part of Mac had hoped she would remember her. She shook off the disappointment and smiled at the little girl. She had grown so much since the last time she had seen her, and was absolutely gorgeous. Harm moved to the bed and sat down next to Mac. He pulled up his legs and sat his daughter in his lap. He grinned as she immediately tried to stand and just as quickly landed on her diaper-padded bottom. He looked up at Mac and placed his hand on her thigh. "You okay?"

Mac nodded. "I'm okay." She took a deep breath and reminded herself how important total honesty was to their relationship. "I'm just a little disappointed she doesn't remember me."

He squeezed her thigh and nodded. "I know. But hopefully it'll make things easier while this is our reality."

"I know." She watched as Amelia tried to stand again, and started to wobble. This time Mac reached out and placed her hands around her waist to steady her. Amelia cocked her head to the side and studied her. She really had grown so much in the past few months. The little hand that reached for her wasn't as chubby as it once was, her beautiful blonde curls were longer, and she was so tall. She glanced at Harm and then back to Amelia. "Was Claudia tall?"

He shook his head. "No. From what I remember she was about Claire's height. Maybe a little bit shorter."

Mac nodded. Claire wasn't even 5'4". It hadn't been as obvious in the photos Harm sent her regularly, but his little girl definitely took after him in the height department. She gently lowered Amelia to the bed and folded her hands in her lap. Mac watched as she moved around the bed, and then settled in Harm's lap. He wrapped an arm around her and smiled down at her. "So, what's on our agenda today?"

He looked up and shrugged. "I don't really have a plan. Especially since I was originally planning on meeting you at the airport in a few hours." He grinned. "I do have a sitter lined up for tonight."

She blushed, remembering their conversation in California, and how they had never actually been on a date. "A sitter, huh?"

"A sitter." He repeated. "And Nicole is willing to stay until midnight, so we'll have plenty of time just the two of us."

She smiled, and then tilted her head to the side. "Wait. Nicole? Did something happen with Lily?" It was his turn to blush, and she raised an eyebrow. "When did you realize she has a little crush on you?"

His eyes widened. "How did you know?"

Mac shrugged. "I think that's one of those things a woman just knows."

He nodded. "She's never said anything or acted on it. I just had a feeling. But I felt like an asshole asking her to baby sit on a Friday night while I take you on a date."

"You're a good man, Harmon Rabb."

His grin was broad. "I try to be."

* * *

Their day together was perfect. He made pancakes for breakfast and they took turns entertaining Amelia while the other showered. Even though Amelia didn't remember Mac, she was an outgoing child and tended to warm up to people quickly. They went to the zoo first, stopped for lunch and a cupcake, and then went to the National Children's Museum. Amelia was too young for most of the exhibits, but they had a few things geared towards infants and toddlers that she seemed to enjoy.

Mac couldn't get over how much the child had changed over the past few months. For starters, she now refused to be worn. Amelia wasn't quite walking yet, but she wasn't fond of being still. She would tolerate the stroller, but would scream and flail about if Harm tried to put her in one of the wraps. She had always been very alert and aware of her surroundings, but now watched people almost obsessively. She would key in on one person and watch them until they left, and then move onto someone else. She wasn't remotely picky about food and during lunch would reach for items on both Harm's plate as well as hers. Much to Harm's chagrin, Amelia seemed to be especially fond of the dollop of frosting from Mac's cupcake she had tried.

After the museum Amelia was in desperate need of a nap, so they made their way back to Harm's apartment. He put her down while she settled on the sofa.

"I don't think she's ever fallen asleep so quickly." He sat next to her, and rubbed a hand over her thigh.

Mac looked up from the magazine she had just started flipping through and grinned. "She's hilarious. And her personality is all you."

He groaned and let his head fall back. "I'm afraid of that. The first time I took her to visit my grandmother I was reminded that I was such a pain in the ass as a child my mom used to say she hoped I'd have a kid just like me someday. I'm worried she may have gotten her wish. Are babies supposed to be that strong willed?"

She shrugged and shifted on the couch, placing her legs on his lap. "Beats me. My experience with babies is limited to Amelia and AJ." She reached for one of his hands and twined their fingers together. "You're a really wonderful dad." She smiled softly and moved her thumb over his skin. "She adores you."

"The feeling is mutual. I was so nervous at first, but all of the things people say you feel when you have a kid are right. It really is a love that is unlike anything I've ever felt before."

Mac cocked her head to the side. His gaze was intense and he looked uncomfortable. "What's wrong?"

He swallowed and opened and closed his mouth a few times before he managed to get the words out. "When we go through with our baby deal… will you…" He sighed deeply. "A part of me is worried that you'll love any children we have more than you love Amelia."

She inhaled sharply and pulled her hand from his. "That's not possible." He opened his mouth and she placed her fingertips on his lips. "It's not possible, Harm. I couldn't love her more if she was mine. I know you want to argue that I can't know that since I'm not a mother, but I do know that. I don't know how to explain it, but I know."

He smiled and she relaxed a bit. "A psychic moment?"

* * *

Harm pulled open the door and grinned at Nicole. "Hey Nicole. Thanks so much for babysitting tonight." He held the door open for her and took her coat once she was inside.

The young woman smiled broadly and hung her purse by the door. "I'm always happy to watch her. Where are you and your date headed?" She pushed the door shut and followed him into the apartment. He bent over to pick up Amelia and she took a moment to admire the view. He was wearing well-fitting chinos and a navy sweater over a lighter blue button-down shirt and was possibly the most gorgeous man she had ever seen, even if he was technically old enough to be her father.

"Dinner in the city. Then I figure we'll play the rest of the night by ear." He checked his watch and glanced toward the bedrooms. "Mac, are you about ready."

"One sec!"

Nicole raised an eyebrow. "Your date is already here?"

"She lives in San Diego and is here visiting for the weekend." They both turned to the sound of footsteps coming from the bedroom and he smiled. "Mac, this is Nicole. Nicole, this is Mac."

Mac hurried over to them and they shook hands. He held out Mac's coat for her, which she slipped into, and then grabbed her purse.

"You have my number, and I left Mac's on the fridge. Amelia has already had dinner and a bath. I-"

Nicole smiled and waved her hand. "Amelia and I will be fine. Go. Enjoy your evening."

"Yes ma'am." He smiled and reached for Mac's hand, and they left the apartment. He was quiet until they were in the elevator, and then he nudged her into a wall and placed his lips on her neck. He pulled back after a second and ran his fingers through her lightly curled hair. "You look incredible." Her dress was the color of red wine and left her shoulders bare, had a fitted bodice, and the skirt flared that out before stopping above her knees.

She beamed and adjusted the collar of his shirt. "Thank you. You look pretty good yourself." She moved her hand to cup the back of his neck and pulled him to her for a kiss. The elevator doors began to open again, since neither of them had pressed a button, and she backed away sheepishly. "So where are we going?"

He pressed the button for the ground floor. "Have you heard of Zaytinya?"

Her eyes lit up and she nodded. "I have. Maddie raves about it constantly."

He grinned, pleased that she approved of his choice. "I've heard a lot of great things about it too."

Given the cooler temperatures and the hour, there weren't many tourists out & traffic was light, so they made it to the restaurant quickly. He checked his watch and noticed they had fifteen minutes before their reservation. "Want to walk around for a bit?"

She shook her head. "Do you mind if we just sit here for a few minutes. I forgot how cold it is here this time of year." She rubbed her hands and then blew into them. "San Diego is at least 20 degrees warmer right now." Harm smiled and adjusted his vents so more heat blew at her. "See? Another perk of living in California."

He reached over and tucked a stray curl behind her ear. "Mac, I don't need any additional incentive to make the move. I'm ready to do it."

"No regrets about leaving everything here behind?"

He shook his head. "I'm going to miss the job. I'm going to miss our friends. I really hate taking Amelia so far from Claire. But I get you. I get my mom and Frank. Amelia will have so much more time with her grandparents. And I get 70 degrees in November." He grinned. "I won't regret it. I promise."

JJJ

They waited in the car for a few more minutes, and then made their way into the restaurant. Mac looked around and took it all in, while Harm took her coat to hand to one of the hostesses. The impressive space was all huge windows, blue and white décor, and a massive bar. She noticed a fireplace on one side and hoped their table was on that side as she rubbed her arms.

"The name is Harm Rabb. I have a reservation for 7:00."

"Harm? Is that you?"

The both of them turned at the sound of his name. He closed his eyes momentarily, opened them in time to notice curiosity all over Mac's face. He forced a smile as the beautiful blonde stepped closer. "Elise, hi. It's good to see you again."

She beamed at him before moving closer and placing a quick kiss on his cheek. "Likewise." Elise glanced at Mac, giving her a subtle once over before turning her attention back to Harm. "I haven't seen you at the bar since that night." She snuck another peek at Mac. "I'm hoping that means you took my advice."

He looked at Mac and gave her a genuine smile. "I did. Elise, this is Sarah MacKenzie. She's here visiting from San Diego for the weekend."

Mac held her hand out to the other woman – the much younger woman. She grabbed it and shook enthusiastically.

"I'm so happy to meet you. Harm told me all about you the night we met. I-"

She was cut off by the appearance of one of the hostesses. "Mr. Rabb, we have your table ready."

He let out a breath and smiled at the hostess. The look on her face made him think she guessed what was going on and was taking pity on him. "Thank you. Elise, it was great seeing you again." He took Mac's hand and they followed her to a small table by the fireplace. She poured water into their glasses and told them their server would be right with him. He grabbed one of the menus and opened it, his eyes not focusing on anything. He could feel Mac watching him, and after a moment of pretending to read he sat the menu down. "I'm sorry about that."

She swallowed, and ran a finger over the rim of the glass. "I'm guessing that's the woman you met the night we got back together." He nodded and she sighed. "She's pretty. Blonde."

He rolled his eyes. "Why does everyone think blonde is my type? I've dated exactly two women with blonde hair."

She raised and eyebrow. "And at least one blonde one-night stand. Almost two." She stopped fidgeting with the glass and folded her hands before placing them in her lap. "I know Claudia was blonde, but I don't know what she looked like."

Harm tried to cool his annoyance. This was their first real date and she was talking about the other women he'd been with. He picked up the water and took a sip. He knew she was insecure. It was one of her reasons for not wanting to do a long-distance relationship. He felt he had to be completely honest with her – to tell her the truth even if he didn't think she really wanted to hear it. "I have pictures of her and Amelia at home. Claire gave them to me for when Amelia is older. I can show you one if you'd like. But she was beautiful. She looked a lot like Claire. The same fair skin, the same wavy blonde hair. I think hers was a lot longer though." Mac nodded, and he could tell she was uncomfortable, but trying not to show it. He sighed. "I remember she had brown eyes. When she sat down next to me at the bar that was the first thing I noticed. I remember thinking that they were close enough to yours that it made me a little less homesick. They weren't the same shape though."

He placed one of his hands on the table, with his palm up. She sucked in a breath and placed her hand on his. He squeezed gently and rubbed a thumb over her fingers. "Sweetheart, we both have a past. There is no use pretending that we don't. But these other women and other men don't matter."

"Logically I know that." She stopped talking as a young man approached their table, and pulled her hand from his. Harm quickly ordered wine, and she went for her standard tonic water with lime. "Logically I know that," she repeated. "I guess it's different. I haven't dated anyone in San Diego. I haven't dated much period, and out of the men I have dated only John is still alive." She winced, feeling like a black widow and forced back the images of Chris and Dalton's final moments. "It's different for you. You have an active social life. As far as I know you see Bobbi occasionally. You could run into Renee at any time. I know Annie is in Baltimore, but I know she has your number if she or Josh need anything." She shook her head. "I don't know. I guess I had accepted that. I didn't think about running into people like Elise."

He rolled his eyes and leaned back. "I know I have this reputation as a ladies man, but honestly I have no idea where it came from. There haven't been that many women, Mac."

"There could be if you wanted them."

He raised an eyebrow. "I don't want them." She couldn't help but smile. She found his confidence both frustrating and incredibly appealing at the same time. "Mac, it's not going to happen, but if I ever did change my mind about us, I'd tell you first. I'm not going to sleep with anyone else – not while I'm committed to you. I respect you too much for that. I'll never cheat. I'll never do anything to break your heart."

She blinked back tears and nodded. She believed him. She really did. She hated being so insecure around him because he had given her no reason to doubt him. "I know. Logically I know that. I'm just scared. Our time apart was so hard. I wanted to call you every single day. That first time I did call, when I ran into Frank, I was terrified to do so but so relieved at the same time. I don't know if I can go through that again."

"You won't have to. We won't have to." He reached across the table again and took her hand. "Mac, I wanted to hear from you so badly. I remember wanting to talk to you but refusing to call since you were the one who ended it. I was so angry. I did try to call once – the night my grandmother died." He saw the color drain from her face and quickly shook his head. "No, it was before I found out about her. I'm just saying. Our time apart was just as hard on me, and I missed you so much. It's why I'm so confident we'll work out this time. Neither of us are going to want to go through that again.

* * *

The restaurant had lived up to the hype, and dinner had been incredible. Harm thanked the hostess as she brought their coats and held Mac's for her to slip into. He reached for their hand and they walked outside and down the street to the excellent parking lot he had managed to snag. "So, what's next?"

He leaned against the car and shrugged. "Honestly, I'm not sure what to do on a date. In the movies it's always dinner and dancing. But there actually aren't any places to go dancing around here. Except for nightclubs I think I'm too old for. There are movies, but a movie on a date just feels like a waste since you can't talk."

She leaned up to kiss him. "Thank you for putting thought into it." She moved her hand to his face and smiled. "Let's go for a drive."

He smiled and opened her car door. "Any particular place in mind?"

She shook her head. "Not really. Maybe out to Mount Vernon. That road along the Potomac is pretty." She climbed into the car and he pushed the door shut before walking around to the driver's side. He quickly programmed his GPS and started the car. The drive was silent for a few minutes as Mac tried to figure out a way to phrase the jumble of words in her head. Finally, she cleared her throat. "This weekend isn't turning out how I thought it would."

He glanced at her and then turned his attention back to the road. "How so?"

Mac sighed and pulled her legs up in the seat and turned to him. "I was expecting it to be like the weekend in San Diego when you surprised me. A lot of sex," she grinned as he snorted, "a lot of just doing nothing." She shook her head. "I'm not saying this very well. That weekend felt like something out of a romance novel. This feels more like real life. It's fun, and it's complicated. I'm insecure when it comes to other women, and you had a moment of insecurity today about whether or not I'd love Amelia as much as I'd love a child of my own. Our weekend in San Diego was just so easy. It's just different than what I was expecting."

Harm glanced at her and cleared his throat. "Is it a bad different?"

She smiled softly. "Not at all. I like that we were able to talk about the uncomfortable stuff and then be able to move past it. I love being with Amelia again. I hate that she doesn't remember me, but you're right. While this is our reality, it's probably for the best. I like being part of this little family again." She ran a hand through her hair. "It's hard to believe I'm a lawyer; I'm doing a terrible job at explaining myself right now."

He smiled and placed his free hand on her knee. "You're doing just fine, Mac."

**End Part 17**


	18. Chapter 18

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes**: I'm sure the way all of this goes down is completely farfetched and outside the realm of possibility. But it's fanfiction, so just go with it.

**Part Eighteen **

**A few weeks later…**

"Sir, I have Admiral Sensenbrenner on the phone for you."

"Thank you, Tiner." AJ picked up the receiver and leaned back in his chair. "Peter! What's new on the West Coast?"

Admiral Peter Sensenbrenner laughed. "Well, my granddaughter has decided she wants to teach me to surf. So, you may get called up for pallbearer duties sooner rather than later." He chuckled as AJ barked out a laugh. "Listen. I need to talk to you about poaching another one of your lawyers."

"Geez, you people have already taken Sarah MacKenzie. Who do you want this time?" AJ stopped for a second when something clicked. His old friend was the base commander in San Diego. San Diego. Where Harm desperately wanted to be. 'Please let it be Harm'.

"I'm not going to apologize for taking MacKenzie. General Marsh adores her, and she's doing a fantastic job. I'd like Commander Rabb." He frowned as AJ let out a sigh. "I've read his file, and I know he's… well, spirited. But is there a problem with him I don't know about?"

AJ shook his head. "Absolutely not. He's a fine officer and a brilliant lawyer. That was a sigh of relief. He's actually been trying to get a position on the West Coast, but hasn't seen anything pop up."

"Well, this one won't pop up, unless I can't find anyone on my own to fill it. I've just started the search for a new Command Judge Advocate. Is that something Rabb would be interested in?"

'Yes!' AJ wanted to scream. But he paused, and answered reasonably. "I think he would be." He drummed his fingers against his desk. "Peter, there's something about Rabb you need to know. It's not my place to tell you this, but I don't want him to get his hopes up and have something happen. He's in a romantic relationship with Colonel MacKenzie." His old friend was quiet for a long moment. He tried to think of something to fill the silence, but then the other man finally spoke.

"She's under General Marsh. Rabb would report directly to me. Their interaction would be minimal, and as long as they can behave professionally, I would have no problem with their relationship. I appreciate the heads up, though." Both men were silent for another moment, and Peter cleared his throat. "So, you'd have no problem with me approaching Rabb about the position? Word has it he's being groomed for your chair one day."

AJ laughed. "No problem at all. He's not getting that particular position any time soon, and I really do think this would be a good fit for him." He gave him Harm's private line and glanced at the calendar. "He's going to be in your area later this week for Thanksgiving. If the phone call goes well you should try to meet."

* * *

"Commander Rabb." Harm secured the phone between his ear and shoulder and continued to rifle through the desk drawer. He knew there was a small bubble pack of aspirin in here somewhere. He sat up straight and stopped looking for the aspirin once the caller had introduced himself. "Hello, sir. How may I help you?" He listened as Admiral Sensenbrenner told him about his phone call with AJ Chegwidden and about the job he was looking to staff.

"It's not nearly as interesting as the position you already have, but it encompasses many legal areas, so I don't think you'd ever be bored. AJ told me about your daughter. This is a position that requires very little travel, and the travel there is comes with plenty of notice. So, what do you think?"

"Sir, I'm honored to be considered. And it sounds like an incredible opportunity."

"Wonderful. AJ also told me you'd be in San Diego this week to spend the holiday with family. I'm not traveling this year, so I'd love to meet and talk in person if you have the time."

"I'll make the time," Harm promised. "My flight gets in Wednesday afternoon, around 3:00. Just let me know when is good for you."

They made a plan for to meet for a drink Wednesday evening, and said their goodbyes. He studied his calendar, and had to figure out how to tell Mac about his meeting with the Admiral. He hated telling her and getting her hopes up, but she was planning on picking them up from the airport and he couldn't keep this from her.

His phone rang again, and he sighed as he answered it.

"Harm, you still haven't told me where you and Amelia are staying over the holiday."

Shit. It was his mother. And whenever she went straight to the point without even a greeting, he knew she was frustrated. "I'm sorry, mom. Things have been hectic lately. I don't know where we're staying. I guess I need to figure that out so you and Mac will quit asking."

"Sweetheart, why don't all three of you stay here at the house. We'd love to have Mac stay. You know we have plenty of room.

He sighed and leaned back. "I don't know, mom. Maybe Amelia can stay with you and Frank and I can bounce back and forth between your house and Mac's apartment."

Trish scoffed. "Don't be silly. All three of you are staying here. Go ahead and let Mac know, and please tell her that I'm not taking no as an answer."

"Mom…"

"I'm not taking no for an answer. She needs to stop being afraid of me. I'm not angry at her for your breakup. I completely understand why she did it. I think she is a lovely girl, and I look forward to getting to know her better."

He sighed. He knew better than to argue with her. At least not now. "Okay. I'll talk to Mac. I better get to work. I'll see you in a couple of days, mom."

"Okay, sweetheart. Give Amelia a kiss from her nana and pop."

He grinned at the grandparent names she and Frank had chosen for themselves. "Yes ma'am." They said their goodbyes and he sat the receiver down. He stared for a long moment before picking it up and calling Mac.

* * *

**Wednesday**

Mac grinned when she spotted Harm and Amelia. He was pushing the stroller with one hand and carrying a small suitcase with the other. He spotted her almost instantly and smiled widely. He approached the row of chairs she was standing by, dropped the suitcase in one and then pulled her to him. He gave her a kiss that was borderline inappropriate for the busy airport before pulling away.

"I've missed you."

Her smiled widened. "I've missed you too." She stretched up to kiss him again, and then knelt to be face to face with Amelia. "Hey there little girl. I've missed you too." Amelia held out her arms and Mac gladly picked her up and placed a loud kiss on her cheek. The child laughed and Mac's heart melted a little more.

He watched them for a minute, and then reached out to brush Amelia's hair off of her face. "She seems more comfortable around you this time."

Mac beamed. "She does, doesn't she. I don't know if she remembers me a tiny bit, or she's just really comfortable around strangers."

"It's only been a couple of weeks since she saw you last. I'm sure at least a small part of her remembers you." The luggage carousel beeped and he turned and saw his flight number flashing on the sign over it. "I'm going to go wait for my bag. I'll be back in a minute." She nodded and bounced Amelia a little as he walked away.

By some miracle, his bag was one of the first ones off the plane, and they were headed to her car a few minutes later, where a new car seat had been installed for Amelia. Mac secured her, while Harm stowed the bag and collapsed the stroller.

She handed the car keys to him, since she didn't know where his parents lived, and they made the drive to La Jolla. It wasn't long before he pulled up to the beautiful home he had spent his adolescence in, and Mac was taken aback. The house itself was mostly windows and was gorgeous, but the front yard looked almost like an English garden.

"Wow." She glanced at him with raised eyebrows. "This is stunning."

He smiled. "Mom will be pleased. She's not an architect by any means, but she worked closely with the team that designed the house. She did design the garden though. It's her pride and joy."

"It's beautiful. I've never seen anything like this in the front of a house before."

"Well the backyard is a massive deck and the Pacific Ocean. So, her dream garden had to go out front. Ready to go in?" She nodded, and they made their way to the front of the massive house. He rang the doorbell and smiled when his mother flung open the door.

Trish forced herself to greet her son and his girlfriend, before kneeling in front of the stroller to smile at Amelia. "Hello sweet girl. Do you remember your nana?" She smiled as Amelia cocked her head to the side to study her, and didn't resist when she was picked up. "I'm so glad you all are here. Now. Let me give Mac a tour, and show you the room I've put together for Amelia." She led the way through the house, pointing out rooms she thought Mac would be interested in, including a small library, the bedroom where she and Harm would sleep, and the gorgeous room she had put together for Amelia.

"Mom, I'm going to put Amelia down for a long overdue nap while you show Mac the rest of the house."

Trish linked her arm through Mac's and smiled at her son. "We'll be on the deck when you're finished."

He watched as they moved arm in arm down the hallway and grinned.

* * *

He appeared on the deck a little while later, dressed more professionally and more alert after the quick shower he had indulged in. Mac and his mother were sitting at the patio table, tall glasses of iced tea in front of them. He poured a glass for himself and sat down next to Mac.

She smiled, and moved her fingers to the collar of his pale blue button-down shirt. "You look nice."

He grinned. "Thank you. I feel incredibly weird going to this meeting in civilian clothes, but he insisted I not worry about bringing a uniform since I'm on vacation."

Mac nodded. "He's a good guy. I haven't worked with him that much, but I like him." She smiled and ran her fingers through the condensation on her glass. "I hope you like him. I hope it goes well."

He reached over and squeezed her shoulder. "I'm sure it will. I have a good feeling about this." She nodded again, and looked up at him. Her dark eyes looked worried, and he leaned in to kiss her forehead. "I don't have any regrets, Mac. I'm ready to be out here with you."

"And us too, I hope." They both remembered they weren't alone and sheepishly looked up at Trish. She was smiling warmly and picked up her glass.

He returned his mothers smile. "I'm ready to be out here with my family", he amended. As much as he loved Mac and wanted to be with her all the time, his mom and Frank were a huge part of why he wanted to be out here. He missed his grandmother desperately, but not a day passed that he wasn't thankful that he had gotten so much time with her. He wanted that kind of relationship for Amelia and her grandparents. Hell, he wanted a stronger relationship with them for himself. After all, none of them were getting any younger.

Trish nodded, understanding how much Sarah's passing had affected him. She wasn't a religious woman, but she imagined her mother-in-law's spirit guiding Harm back to his remaining family. "What time is your meeting?"

He glanced at his watch. "We're meeting at 6:00 at that upscale place on the cove that you and Frank like."

Her eyes lit up. "Ah, yes. George's. Drop Frank's name to the maître'd and Evan will make sure you get a nice table on the rooftop. It's gorgeous up there." She glanced at Mac, and smiled. "You two should go there for dinner one night while you're here. Let Frank and I spoil our granddaughter a bit."

* * *

Harm arrived at the bar a little early and found that the Admiral was already there. A young hostess walked with him to a table by a massive window, and handed him a drink menu before walking away. Peter Sensenbrenner stood, and extended a hand to him. Harm took his hand and gave it a firm shake before sitting down.

"Commander, I'm so glad you were able to meet with me. I'm not taking you away from anything, am I?"

"No sir." He picked up his napkin and shook it out before placing it in his lap. "My mother and stepfather are entertaining my daughter while I'm here. I think they were ready for me to leave so they could start trying to win her affection with chocolate." Peter laughed and Harm smiled. It wasn't a loud, booming laugh like AJ Chegwidden's but it was warm and sounded genuine.

"I have three granddaughters. Now don't get me wrong. Anna – my wife – and I adore our three boys. But there is nothing more enjoyable than spoiling a grandchild." He cleared his throat. "And Colonel MacKenzie? This isn't cutting into any plans she had, is it?"

Harm looked up sharply. "Sir?"

Peter smiled. "AJ told me about your relationship. He didn't want me offering you this position and then having to take it back if I had a problem with your personal life."

He let out a breath. He was relieved he knew about Mac. He hadn't been sure how to approach the topic. "We didn't have any plans. She's with my daughter and my mother right now." Harm cleared his throat and took a sip of water. "I wish Admiral Chegwidden had told me you already knew about Mac and I. I was trying to figure out how to bring it up."

Peter leaned back in his chair. "If things don't work out between the two of you - well. Will it make you wan to head back east? Or find a different position? Because I'm looking for someone who is willing to stick around a for a while. Ideally until I retire, which despite what my wife says, isn't going to happen for a while."

Harm shook his head. "No sir. If my relationship doesn't work out, I think we'll both be mature enough to handle the occasional interaction. And I'm not here just for her. I know I told you that my mother and stepfather are out here, but I didn't mention that my grandmother passed away recently. And ever since I've just felt this pull to be closer to the people that are left."

The older man watched him for a long moment and Harm was sure that he knew the story of his father. Or at least the story that was attached to his file. He wondered if he would ask. He didn't even know if he wanted him to ask. His father had been such a huge part of his Naval career up to this point, and he wondered what it would be like without everyone knowing the whole complicated, sad story.

"Glad to hear it. Let's order a drink, shall we?" And he raised his arm to get the attention of their waitress.

Two hours, two exceptional glasses of scotch and many glasses of water later the two men were talking and telling stories as if they were old friends. Peter's cellphone rang and he glanced at his watch before answering it. "Damn. I was supposed to be home by now. One second." Harm nodded and he flipped open the phone and greeted what he assumed was his wife. He tuned out the conversation and glanced around the restaurant. They were busier now, and the place was full of well-dressed couples. He imagined bringing Mac to this place for a date. Then picking Amelia up from his parent's house and visiting with them for a while. Maybe just sitting on the deck and talking for a while. His eyes moved to the view outside the large windows and he smiled. November in San Diego was completely different than November in Washington. He imagined Amelia playing and walking and building sand castles on that beach. Maybe they could get a dog. This job would be so much more stable than the one he currently had, and a pet would no longer be out of the realm of possibility. He loved dogs. He could see Mac and Amelia and himself running with a dog on the beach. He could almost hear squeals of laughter as the theoretical dog shook off and sprayed them all with cold water.

"Harm?"

He jerked out of his daydream and turned back to the Admiral. "Sorry about that."

Peter looked out the window and smiled. "It's a nice view. And it never gets old. I hate to cut this short, but I have to get home. My wife is in a panic about her Thanksgiving meal tomorrow. Any questions for me?"

Harm drained the last of his water. "I guess I'm just curious why me? There have to be people who are more qualified. Who have better service records."

He shrugged. "I like your service record. I made it through the thing thoroughly impressed and not even slightly bored. A lot of the more… shall we say interesting things… on your record are there because you're a trial attorney and doing whatever it takes for a client. That's not this job. There will be no need for my legal advisor to fire a weapon in a courtroom." Harm blushed and Peter grinned. "If you ever need to fire a weapon to convince me to do something, just say so and we'll take a field trip to the firing range." They both laughed and then went quiet while Peter thanked the waitress and signed the credit slip. "But honestly, I like your experience. I'm drawn to it. It's a big Navy, Harm. There are people from all walks of life, doing vastly different and yet all incredibly important jobs. I like that you've had more than one of those jobs. I like the different perspective that your experience as a pilot has given you. And honestly, I like you. The person in this position is going to work closely with me for years to come, and it's important that I get along with that person." Harm nodded, and stood when Peter did. Peter extended his hand, which Harm grabbed and shook. "Now if you need some time to think more about this, let me know. But if I don't hear from you, I'm going to get the ball rolling on the paperwork when I'm back in the office on Friday.

He shook his head. "I don't need time. The job sounds perfect, and I'd love the opportunity to work with you."

**End Part 18**


	19. Chapter 19

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Note:** The song Harm sings to Amelia is 'Smile', by Nat King Cole. It always makes me think of the movie My Girl 2, and the scene at the end when Vada sings it to her new sibling.

**Part Nineteen **

**Later that evening…**

Harm settled into a hammock that was tucked into a corner of the deck and smiled at Mac. He tapped the space beside him and shifted to free a little more space.

She studied the space and frowned. "Are you sure we'll both fit?" He nodded and she gingerly tucked in beside him. She covered part of his body with her own, and he wrapped an arm around her.

He loved nights like this. Whenever he came for a visit, he always made his way onto the hammock once his mother and stepfather were in bed. This night was perfect. It was cool, but not cold. The waves were rough and the sound made the most enticing soundtrack. And the woman of his dreams was curled up on him. "Were you okay tonight without me?"

She lifted her head and studied him for a few seconds. She put her head back against his chest and closed her eyes. "It was good. Your mom and Frank really are wonderful people. Frank grilled the most delicious steak for tacos. And your mom didn't give me a chance to be nervous. She took charge and we spent a while going through old pictures of you." She lifted her head again to grin at him. "You were an adorable little boy." He groaned and she laughed.

"Remind me to thank her at breakfast in the morning." She laughed again, and he tightened his arm around her. "I'm glad it was okay being alone with them." She murmured something, and he kissed the top of her head. "I have to say it was really nice going out for a drink and not worrying about Amelia for one second. Lily and her other sitters are great, and I trust them. But there is just something so comforting about leaving her with people who love her as much as I do."

"She's such a good kid, Harm. You're doing an amazing job with her."

He smiled and shifted slightly in the hammock. "This job has minimal travel. Did I tell you that?" He could feel her nod. "That's one of the most appealing parts of this job." He was quiet for a minute and ran his hand up and down her arm. "Did I ever tell you that I missed seeing Amelia's first steps?"

Mac lifted her head to study him. "No. I don't think you have."

Harm nodded. "I was on the Seahawk with Bud. Lily got plenty of video, but I wasn't there, holding my arms out for her to walk to. And that hurts."

She ran her fingers over his chest. "Sweetheart, it still could have happened when you weren't home. Even with a 9-5, you'll still miss things."

"Oh, I know. But it's less likely that'll I miss everything. I love you, and I'm so ready to be in the same state as you all the time. And I love my mom and Frank, and I'm excited to spend more time with them. But I'm so relieved that I'll get to be with Amelia more. Especially as she gets older. I want to be active in her life and be a really good dad. This job is going to let me do that."

She moved closer to him and kissed him softly. "You're a good dad." She grinned, and ran her fingers through his hair. "But then again I always knew you would be."

He was quiet for a long moment, and cleared his throat. "You're a good mom." He saw her open her mouth and went on. "You are, Mac. We can go as slow as you want, and take all the time in the world. It doesn't matter. But you've loved her like she was yours and treated her like she was yours from the very beginning. Unless something unimaginable happens to us, you'll be the only mom she ever knows."

Mac bit her lip. "Harm, I want that. I want to be her mother so badly. But I feel guilty. What about Claire? I don't know if I'll ever feel comfortable being referred to as her mother in front of Claire. I know it's silly, but I feel guilty about taking Claudia's place."

He winced. Claudia. He had been feeling guilt over Claudia lately as well. Not over Mac taking her place, and mothering Amelia. But for not feeling sorry that she was gone. If she were still alive, she would have kept his daughter from him. He would have never known she existed. Claire's words the day she had shown up in his office kept running through his head.

'_She didn't want to share her with a man she met in a bar.'_

He took a breath and tried to calm down. He didn't want to get into that now. He didn't want to let his anger bubble out and ruin their evening. "Claudia isn't here, Mac. Claire knows that better than anyone."

"I know."

They were quiet, and Harm reached out to push his hand against the wall and caused the hammock to rock gently back and forth. "I don't want to talk about Claire or Claudia or Amelia right now." He placed a kiss on the top of her head. "I've missed you so much, and I just want to enjoy this moment."

* * *

"Happy Thanksgiving!"

Harm grinned as he walked into the kitchen carrying Amelia. His mother immediately dusted her hands off on the apron and reached for her granddaughter, and told Harm to help himself to coffee and pastries.

Frank looked up from the large turkey he was working on and smiled. "Morning, Harm. If you want anything besides sugar coated sugar for breakfast, I have some egg white breakfast sandwiches in the freezer." He grinned as Harm chuckled, and turned back to the turkey and the massive pile of herbs, lemons, and garlic.

He focused on filling a mug with coffee, and not feeling overwhelmed with affection toward Frank. He wondered for the first time if Frank had actually been the one to influence his eating habits. His mother's diet was as atrocious as Mac's, and his grandmother hadn't eaten much junk food, but she had been a diehard carnivore. His stepfather on the other hand… this was a man who preferred tea to coffee, loved tofu and grain salads, and only ate white meat and seafood. "That sounds great. Thank you." He opened the freezer and saw a box sitting on top of ice cream bars his mom liked.

"Those are excellent," Frank said. "And they're made locally. Heat one up for Mac, too."

Harm laughed and took one sandwich from the freezer. "Unfortunately, Mac eats like mom. She'd much rather have donuts or Danishes than," he glanced at the label on the sandwich, "egg whites & chicken sausage." He put his breakfast in the microwave and took a sip of his coffee. "But she can decide for herself when she comes down. She's taking a shower." He took a skillet out of a cabinet and got to work making Amelia breakfast. He scrambled her an egg, cut up an avocado, and peeled a mandarin. He put a little of each on her pale pink plate and placed the plate on the tray of her high chair. He beamed as Amelia immediately went for a piece of the avocado. He kept an eye on her for another minute and then turned to his mother. "So, I hear my old baby photos made an appearance last night."

Frank snorted, and Trish shot him a glare before turning to her son. "They did." She glanced at Amelia, and then turned her attention back to him and smiled wistfully. "I hadn't looked at them in a very long time. It was nice." He rolled his eyes and she shrugged. "I have to admit, I was looking for more similarities between you and Amelia. I don't see much of you in her, other than the eyes."

"She looks like Claudia." His tone was flat, and he could feel the anger bubbling again. What was wrong with him? It had been nearly seven months since Amelia came into his life. Why was he just now feeling this anger towards her mother?

Trish cocked her head to the side and studied him. "Is something wrong, sweetheart?"

He took a breath and forced a smile. "Nothing's wrong. Just feeling a little guilty about Claudia these days."

Trish took the comment the way he had expected her too, and reached over to stroke Amelia's cheek. "I know. It's hard thinking of your child's other parent missing the important milestones."

He thought about the massive Christmas tree in his apartment, the hanging stockings and all of the wrapped gifts for Amelia underneath. The thought of not being with her for her first Christmas made him feel sick. "Yeah, it is."

* * *

After a delicious and indulgent meal, Trish had herded them all onto the beach. She set up her camera and tripod, and took a few group photos with a handy remote, and then shooed them all away to take photos of Amelia on the beach. It was her first time on the beach, and she absolutely loved it.

Mac walked over to the steps that led up to their deck and sat on the bottom one. She was thankful to have been included, but thought that Trish might appreciate some time with just her son. She watched her take a photo of Harm tossing a laughing Amelia into the air and smiled. God, she couldn't wait to have him here all the time.

"Mind if I join you?"

She looked up and smiled at Frank. "Please."

He sat next to her. "Thank you for agreeing to stay with us. Having Harm and Amelia here for the whole visit means so much to her."

"Thank you for inviting me to stay. That meant a lot to me." She laughed as she watched Harm struggle to keep Amelia from putting a fist full of sand in her mouth.

"She loves the two of you – well, I guess the three of you together." He paused, not completely sure if she should bring up the cause of the uneasiness. He took a breath, and decided to go for it. He could see the way Harm looked at her. This woman was his world, and Frank doubted he'd let her out of his life again. "And she completely understands why you ended things with him. If anything, she was livid with him for not agreeing to come out here with you."

She nodded. "I was just concerned. I love him and Amelia so much. It's really important to me that the two of you like me." She looked at Frank and smiled. "The truth is, that I don't come from a nice family. Not like yours. My mother isn't part of my life, and my father is deceased, but we were estranged before he died. I guess I'm just not very comfortable around parents."

Frank leaned back. "I didn't either." She looked at him, and he offered a wry smile and continued. "I didn't come from a nice family either. Family is complicated, and as an adult it wasn't anything I wanted to be a part of." His gaze moved to his wife. "Then I met her. And her scrawny 12-year-old son. And everything changed for me. The only thing we want for him is someone who loves him unconditionally." He adjusted and put a hand on her shoulder. "You're exactly what we want for him."

"Thank you, Frank."

He squeezed her shoulder. "Anytime." He turned his attention back to his family.

* * *

Harm stepped out of the bathroom and pulled the towel from around his waist. Mac unashamedly watched. He was a beautiful man. He was muscular, but not bulky. Slim, but not thin. Her eyes moved lower and admired his legs. She always wondered if men's legs were a weird thing to be aroused by, but in this case, she couldn't help it. He had perfect, muscular, incredibly sexy legs.

"See something you like?"

His voice jolted her back to reality, and she blushed. Instead of answering, she marked the page of the book she was reading and crawled across the bed to the edge. She pulled herself up on her knees and lightly wrapper her arms around his neck. "When it comes to you, I always like what I see."

He dipped his head and kissed. Gently at first, but he couldn't help himself and deepened the kiss almost instantly. Her perfect mouth tasted like ginger, her hair was still damp from her shower, and her skin was luxuriously soft. He slid his hands under the t-shirt of his she was sleeping in and tossed it aside before gently nudging her back onto the bed. She settled against the pillows and looked up at him. If he hadn't already been aroused, that look would have done it. Her eyes were huge. Dark with lust. And so full of love and trust it made it hard for him to breath. He tugged down the scrap of material she claimed were panties and settled over her. "I love you."

She pushed her fingers through his damp hair and then moved her hands down his body. "I love you so much."

A while later, she lay curled into his side, and they both tried to steady their breathing. "That was fun."

He snorted and kissed her shoulder. "Understatement. I'm sorry I was too tired last night."

She shook her head, and he laughed as her hair tickled him. "Don't apologize." She placed a kiss on his chest and then looked up at him. "Besides. You'll be out here soon enough. I'm sure you'll be sick of me in no time."

Harm snorted again and rolled them over, hovering above her. "I will never, ever be sick of you. Want me to prove it?"

She raised an eyebrow. "I thought you needed more recovery time than that, Sailor."

He grinned and moved down her body, before settling between her thighs. "Not all of me does."

* * *

"Have you ever done that in this room before?"

She had curled up beside him, and had her head propped up with a hand. He blushed, and she raised an eyebrow.

He cleared his throat. "Technically no. Not this room. But this house. Yeah. Once." He shifted, and tucked an arm behind his head. "My first time was in the bonus room downstairs. Frank had made it into a hangout space for my friends and I, and there were insanely comfortable couches. I had a girlfriend senior year, and one of our make out sessions on one of the couches just went too far." He winced. "We broke up a few days later. I guess I wasn't very good."

She laughed at him. "I doubt that was it, but you're definitely good now."

"What makes you think that wasn't it?"

Mac shrugged. "The first time is almost never good. But it's the first time, so there's nothing to compare it to."

"Who was your first?"

She moved her hand and let her head drop to his chest. "It was Eddie."

His eyes widened and he shifted. "Eddie? Your friend Eddie?"

She nodded. "It was our senior year too. We were both virgins, and we were the only ones who were. And in a rare moment of sobriety, we decided to be each-others firsts, rather than give that to one of the losers we were bound to end up with." She smiled softly. "It didn't last very long, but it was nice doing that for the first time with someone I loved and who loved me. It wasn't a romantic love, but it was love." She lifted her head again to look at him. "This is a weird post-coital conversation."

He shrugged. "Maybe. But I don't mind it. We both have a past, Mac. We both have had lovers and serious relationships. Besides. I like learning new things about you. Even things like that."

She smiled and was about to kiss him again, when they heard Amelia cry through the baby monitor. Harm glanced at the clock on the bedside table and frowned.

"That's weird. She usually sleeps through the night."

Mac shrugged and sat up. "It's been a big day. And I'm sure the time difference and being off her schedule is effecting her."

"Maybe." He stood up and pulled a pair of pajama bottoms off of the chair he had tossed them on this morning. "I'll be right back."

She got out of bed and found the discarded t-shirt and panties and pulled them back on. She was about to climb back in when she heard Harm's voice over the baby monitor. She reached over and turned it up a little, and smiled when she recognized the song he was singing.

_Light up your face with gladness__  
__Hide every trace of sadness__  
__Although a tear may be ever so near__  
__That's the time you must keep on trying__  
__Smile, what's the use of crying?__  
__You'll find that life is still worthwhile__  
__If you just smile_

The lyrics were a little sad, but the song was pretty. And his voice was just so damned soothing. He finished the song and started over, but only got halfway through when he trailed off. A minute later he was back in their room.

"Is she okay?"

He nodded. "She seems to be. She's asleep again." He crawled back into the bed and turned on his side to face her. "Do you see much of me in her?"

"She definitely has your eyes." She cocked her head to the side. "She's tall like you." But I don't know. I don't see her much so it's hard to say. Why do you ask?"

"I don't really know. Just thinking about something mom said."

Mac sat up and crossed her legs. She studied Harm, who now had both hands behind his head and was staring at the ceiling. "What did she say?"

He shook his head. "Nothing really. Just the same thing about only seeing me in Amelia's eyes. But I said I was feeling guilty over Claudia, and she took it to mean that I was feeling guilty that she wasn't here for Amelia's milestones." He looked at her and swallowed. "That's not why I feel guilty."

"What's going on?" Her voice was soft, and she ran a hand over his cheek.

He swallowed, and kept his eyes on her. "Lately I've been so angry with Claudia. It started last week when I put up the Christmas tree. I was putting up stockings, and wrapping gifts, and it hit me that this was Amelia's first Christmas, and if Claudia hadn't died, I wouldn't know that I was a father. I can't get that thought out of my head back. And now, I feel guilty that I'm not sad she's dead, or sad she's missing out on these milestones with our daughter. Because if she was alive, I'd be the one missing out."

**End Part 19**


	20. Chapter 20

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes:** Sorry this is a little short. It was either end it here or have it be insanely long.

**Part Twenty**

**Three Weeks Later **

Erica Rodriguez swallowed hard. One of the most handsome men she had ever seen had just entered the office and was walking up to her desk. She swallowed again. "May I help you, sir?" He grinned broadly, and she was relieved she was sitting, otherwise her knees may have given out on her.

"I'm here to see Sarah MacKenzie."

Work. Yes. Focus on work, and not his incredible eyes. And that smile. She forced herself to look away from him and cast a glance at the Colonel's office. "She's in a meeting right now." She looked down at her watch and back to him. "She should be finished any minute, if you'd care to wait."

"I don't mind waiting. Thank you." He started to make his way around the room, studying the framed prints that were hanging neatly on the walls. Everything was perfectly lined up, and he wondered if that was Mac's doing. Her jaw had actually dropped when she had helped him hang framed art on Amelia's bedroom walls, and he hadn't measured the space between each frame. He heard a familiar burst of laughter come from her office, followed by a masculine chuckle and felt his stomach tighten. He heard a door open and turned in its direction. A tall, handsome man was leaving the office, with Mac following behind him. She hadn't noticed him yet, and he took the moment to study them. She looked relaxed and happy. The man bore a striking resemblance to John Fallow, and he forced himself to take a breath.

"I'll see you tonight, Mac."

That's it. He'd had enough and stepped out of the corner he was in and made himself seen. Her eyes widened, and the tightening in his stomach relaxed a bit when a spectacular smile lit up her face.

"What are you doing here?" She stepped toward him, wanting to be in his arms. Then she remembered that she was in her office, and her commanding officer was standing two feet away. She stopped in her tracks and her smile dimmed, but just a bit. Mac turned to the older man and made the introductions. "Sir, this is Commander Harmon Rabb Jr. We worked together for a while in Washington. Harm, this is General Marsh."

The two men shook hands. General Marsh looked between the two younger officers and grinned. "So, you're the famous Commander Rabb. I've heard a lot about you, and it's so nice to put a face to the name." He saw the confused look on both of their faces. "Not from the colonel. Admiral Sensenbrenner has told me all about you. He's thrilled that you're joining his team."

Harm smiled and relaxed a little. "I'm pretty excited myself. I'm not due out here until the beginning of February, but I thought I'd come out now and get a head start on finding a place to live."

"Oh, are you planning to buy a house?"

He nodded. "Yes, sir. I figure since I'll be here for a while, I should probably take the plunge and buy something."

"Real estate is always a good investment. Especially in such a heavy military area. You can always rent it out when it's time to move on if you choose not to sell." He discretely glanced in Mac's direction and noticed her eyes were wide with surprise. "Well, I better get going. Mac, if you could send me those reports by the end of the day, I'd appreciate it." She nodded, and he turned to Harm. He held out his hand to shake again. "It was a pleasure to meet you. And if you don't have any properties to look at this evening, you should come with Mac to our office Christmas party. My wife and I would love to have you."

"Thank you, sir." General Marsh nodded and gave Erica a warm smile before returning to his own office.

Mac cleared her throat and stepped closer to Harm. "Let's talk in my office." He followed her to the office and shut the door behind them.

"Mac- " The moment the door had clicked shut, she launched herself at him. After a kiss that left both of them breathless, she pulled back and adjusted her rumpled uniform. He reached up to wipe a smear of lipstick off of the corner of her mouth, and then kissed her again. "Hi."

Her eyes were wide as she stared up at him. "Hi? Hi? Seriously? What are you doing here? Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

He smiled and shrugged. "It was a spur of the moment thing."

She continued to stare at him, and finally shook her head. "Life with you is never dull." She leaned forward to kiss him again. "I've missed you."

He ran his hand over her hair. "I've missed you too. Can you get away for lunch so we can talk?"

Mac nodded, and grabbed her things. They left her office and Harm stood to the side as she told her assistant she was going out for lunch and would be back soon. They were quiet while they walked to her car. Once they were buckled in and headed towards her favorite lunch spot, she started to ask questions. "How long can you stay?"

He reached for her hand and toyed with her long fingers. "Just till Sunday morning. Amelia is with Claire this weekend, and Claire has her final sorority meeting of the year Sunday night. I have a flight out at 10:30."

"So, you want to buy a house?"

"Yeah, I think so." He stopped fidgeting and just held her hand. "I'd like Amelia to grow up with a backyard and a swing set. I'd like to have space for all of her little friends to come over for birthday parties and things like that." He shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe I'm going overboard."

Mac squeezed his hand. "I think it's a great idea."

He looked at her and smiled. "Want to come house hunting with me tomorrow?"

She had been braking as she approached the red light, and applied a little too much pressure. They jerked forward, and she blushed as the car behind her honked. She was quiet as she moved the Corvette forward and came to a reasonable stop, and then looked at him. "You want me to come house hunting with you?"

Harm frowned. "Why wouldn't I? I know we both want to take things slower this time, but we both know where we're headed, Mac. It'll be your house someday too."

She stared at him for a long moment until another honk jerked her out of her stupor. The light had turned green. She stepped on the gas and stared straight ahead. "I think we should table this conversation until we get to the restaurant so they guy behind us doesn't murder me."

* * *

The restaurant Mac had chosen was a charming bistro on the water. They ordered waters and then took a few minutes to look over the menu. Finally, Mac closed hers and pushed it aside. Harm looked up at her and did the same.

"Yes, I want to buy a house. Yes, I want your input."

She raised an eyebrow. "Why not just wait until we're ready to take that step? I'm not comfortable that you're going to pick a house with my wants and needs in mind, when you'll be paying for it alone. That just doesn't sit right with me."

He frowned. "Mac, my daughter isn't even a year old and has lived in two different houses with three different guardians. I want her to be settled. I don't want to live in an apartment now while you and I wait to take the next step. I want to go ahead and buy a house for our family. And when we take that next step, you can just move in with me. I don't want to move Amelia again a year or so from now just so that your name will be on the loan documents."

"Harm, I want us to be equals. I want a house that's ours, not yours."

"I-" He stopped as the waitress approached them. He ordered a crab cake sandwich while Mac ordered fish tacos. The waitress took their menus and left the table, and he turned his attention back to her. "Mac, it's a year or so of a mortgage. One day we'll add your name to all of the paperwork. Hell, we can even refinance if you want so your name is on the loan too. But I'm buying a house. I'm going to be here for a while, and I want Amelia to have a house."

She stabbed at the lime in her glass with the straw and sighed. "You're right. I'm being ridiculous. I just…" She sighed. "Harm, my family had nothing, and once I got sober, I worked so hard to provide for myself and give myself the things that I wanted. This feels like you providing, and me taking." She looked at her hands and tried to swallow back the lump in her throat.

"Mac. Mac, look at me." His voice was gentle, and she looked up to meet his eyes. "Sweetheart, you're not taking anything. I want to buy a house. And since one day I want you to live in that house with us, I'd like your input on that house. I want joint bank accounts. I want us to both do household chores. I want us to parent equally. You're my partner, Mac."

She smiled and reached for his hand. "I really, really love you."

* * *

Mac unlocked the door to her apartment and led them inside. She dropped her keys in the dish on the console table. Harm ran his hands over her shoulders and then helped her out of her coat. "Thanks." She walked over to the sofa and collapsed onto it. He hung both coats in the small coat closet and joined her on the couch. She ran her fingers over the buttons of his shirt. "This is a nice shirt. I'm sorry you had to go buy new clothes for tonight."

He shrugged. "I don't mind." He covered her hand with his. "Tonight was fun. I like your coworkers."

She cocked her head to the side and studied him. "Really."

Harm squirmed uncomfortably. "Really. Why?"

It was her turn to shrug. "You seemed a little uncomfortable around General Marsh. Did you not like him?"

He sighed and leaned back. "He's fine. He's great, actually. It's just… Does he remind you of anyone?" He could see the wheels turning and she shook her head. "He reminds me of John Farrow."

Mac took a breath and shifted beside him. She couldn't get annoyed with him, not when she had let other women upset her on their first official date. She lifted her skirt and straddled his lap. "Maybe a little." She shrugged and leaned in to brush her lips over his. "But it doesn't matter. You're it for me, Harm."

Harm offered her a small smile and moved his hands to her hips. "I do like him. And his wife is very nice." He placed a kiss on her forehead. "I'm sorry. That's just been on my mind all day."

"Don't apologize. You've seemed off. I'm glad you told me. But really, you have nothing to be jealous about. I'm madly in love with you." He smiled at her, but she noticed the smile didn't meet his eyes. "Is something else wrong?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Hop up for a second." She climbed off of his lap, and he went to her bedroom. He returned with a small white box in his hand. He sat down again and extended the box to her. She opened it, and frowned. He took a deep breath and took the small silver frame out of the box, and tossed the box aside. He let the frame dangle by a red satin cord and let it spin. "It's a sonogram photo of Amelia."

"Where did that come from?" Her voice was soft and she took the frame from him.

"Claire. She gave it to me yesterday. She thought it would be nice for me to hang it on our tree." He laughed, but it was a harsh, bitter laugh. "It was on Claudia's tree last year. And Claire thought it would be nice to have this little piece of her with Amelia." Mac put the ornament back in the box. "I'm still angry, Mac. I'm so angry and I can't seem to make the anger go away."

She took the box out of his hand and sat it on the coffee table. "What are you going to do?"

"What do you mean?"

She took a breath. "You can't keep holding onto this anger. You're absolutely entitled to be upset, but you're going to have to deal with it sooner or later."

"And how am I supposed to do that?" He raked a hand through his hair. "I start to feel less angry and I think everything is okay, and then I hear from Claire. And that makes me think of Claudia, and then I'm angry all over again. Jesus, Mac. If she had lived, she would have kept my daughter from me. How am I supposed to deal with that?"

"I know." Her voice was quiet, and she reached over to smooth his disheveled hair. "You need to talk to Claire." He opened his mouth, and she moved her fingers to his lips. "You can talk to me all you want. I'll always be here to listen. But you have to talk to Claire. I know it's not Claire you have a problem with, but she's the one triggering these feelings. And she's a part of your life, and Amelia's life. You can't spend the next however many years wanting to scream every time she mentions her sister."

"I know." He reached for her hand and squeezed. "You make everything feel better. Have I ever told you that?" She smiled at him, and it was another one of those smiles that lit up her entire face. God, she was beautiful. He ran his fingers over her bare arm. "Can we not talk about this anymore tonight?"

Mac raised an eyebrow and shifted to straddle him again. "What should we do instead?"

He grinned and stood, lifting her with him. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and lowered her mouth to his while he carried her to the bedroom.

**End Part 20**

**Up Next: **Harm & Mac house hunt, and Harm finally has a long overdue conversation with Claire.


	21. Chapter 21

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes:** Just for fun I looked up real estate listings in San Diego while writing this. Holy moly. I live on the east coast of the United States and it's just mind boggling how much more expensive homes on the west coast are.

**Part Twenty-One**

Harm pulled into the driveway of the first house they were scheduled to see. They were a few minutes early, and the realtor hadn't arrived yet. Mac took in the house and the yard, and raised an eyebrow. "Just how much are you looking to spend?"

He blushed. The subject of money was always an uncomfortable one. He told her the price range he had given the realtor, and watched as her eyes comically widened. "Mac, I can afford it. I have money from my dad and my grandmother to put toward the loan. The mortgage payment is lower than my BAH." He shrugged. "And I guarantee you that you pay more in rent for that fancy apartment than I will for this house." He turned the car off and opened the door. "Come on. Let's walk around while we wait for Marilyn."

He got out of the car and waited for her to follow. He went to the gate and pulled it open and walked into the fenced in backyard. She followed, and let out a small gasp. "Wow. This is beautiful." There was a huge deck that would be perfect for entertaining, thick grass that was the perfect shade of green, a large play structure on one side of the fence, with a slide, a few swings, and something to climb. And in the center of the yard was a pool and a hot tub. She smiled at him and walked over to the deck. She leaned against the railing and looked over the yard.

"What do you think?" He asked, as he joined her.

"Well, this one has a pool. So, I'm a fan so far."

He moved to stand behind her, and wrapped his arms loosely around her waist. "All of the houses we're going to see today have pools."

She turned and stared at him. "Really?" He nodded and she cocked her head to the side. "Is that a coincidence?"

He shook his head. "No. That's the one thing I knew you wanted." He watched her expression change from curiosity to shock. He reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "You told me that first night we took Amelia swimming in the pool at my apartment. You told me that you had always wanted a pool, and if you ever got around to buying a house you would put one in."

"Harm-"

"Well hello you two!"

They both turned and Harm smiled at the older woman walking through the backyard. Marilyn Thomas was an old friend of his mother's, and was a top real estate agent in the area. She approached them with a large smile on her face, and when Harm held out a hand to shake, she embraced him instead.

"It's so good to finally meet you, Harm. Trish and Frank talk about you all the time." She turned to Mac and beamed. "And you must be Sarah. They've told me all about you too." She gave the younger woman a hug as well, oblivious to the looks her clients were exchanging. Marilyn pulled back and turned to look at the yard. "This is just lovely. Are you two ready to see the inside of the house? They both nodded and she led them around to the front door. She typed in a code on the keypad of the lock box, removed the key and unlocked the front door. She stepped aside so Harm and Mac could enter first, and then shut the door behind her.

"Whoa." Mac looked around the room, taken aback by the size of it.

Harm agreed. "I think my whole apartment could fit in this living room."

Marilyn smiled and walked around the room. "Now keep in mind that this house is in desperate need of updating, but it's a great neighborhood and a fantastic price."

Harm took in the stone fireplace and the beige carpet. He would have to find the time to redo the fireplace and replacing the carpet with hardwoods. The room had huge windows that looked over the front yard, and the back wall of the room was multiple sets of French doors that opened up to the deck. He walked over to the kitchen and took a deep breath. The kitchen wasn't bad, but Marilyn was right. It desperately needed to be updated. The cabinets were solid wood and were fine but would need to be sanded and stained a different color. But the appliances looked ancient and flooring and countertops weren't his style and would need to be replaced. But it was large, had a very nice walk in pantry and space for a small table and chairs.

After the kitchen, Marilyn showed them the formal dining room, the bathroom downstairs and the large room that would be perfect for an office. There were four bedrooms upstairs. All were a good size, especially the master suite with an ensuite bathroom, and a massive walk in closet.

"So, what are your thoughts on this one?" Marilyn asked as they headed back to their cars.

"I liked it," Harm said. He fished his keys out of his pocket. "It does need some updating, but it's livable as it is and it's all work that I wouldn't mind doing as long as I could find the time." He glanced at Mac. "What did you think?"

She shrugged. "It's a nice house. I love the backyard." She ignored the curious glance Harm directed at her. "Marilyn, how far are we from the next one?"

"Oh, not too far. I think maybe ten minutes or so. You two can follow me if you'd like."

They got into their cars and headed toward the next house. They were quiet for the first few minutes of the drive, other than Harm tapping his fingers against the steering while. Finally, he glanced at her and sighed. "What's up, Mac? Did you not like the house?"

"It's a beautiful house." She looked out the window, and then back at him. "It really is. I can see its potential. It's just so big. Why would we ever need a house that big?"

"It's all space we need," he argued. "A bedroom for us, one for Amelia, one for a future baby, and then an office for each of us."

She stared at him incredulously. "Harm, we don't both need an office. We can share one. I doubt it's a space we'll use that much. One would be fine, and we don't need bedrooms that big. I mean, that was a 6000 square foot house. Right now, both of our apartments are about 1000 square feet and we both have enough space."

"You don't want a large bedroom? A nice walk-in closet?"

She shrugged. "No on the bedroom, yes on the closet. I'm content with the bedroom sizes we already have. I've never understood the need for the huge bedrooms with a separate sitting area. I can sit in the living room. Or on a patio chair on the deck."

He was quiet for a long moment and finally sighed. "I really should have talked to you about this before arranging to look at houses."

* * *

The next four houses Marilyn showed them were all similar to the first. Mac had given up hope that they'd see anything reasonable, and felt guilty for deflating Harm's enthusiasm, but he should have talked to her about this first, and she couldn't help being annoyed that he hadn't. They spoke on the phone every night and he had never mentioned wanting to buy a house. She took a deep breath, and tried to relax as they approached the sixth house. She frowned as they pulled into the driveway. This one looked nothing like the others. It looked small – it was definitely the smallest house on the street. But it was charming. Harm got out of the car and cast a glance in her direction.

Marilyn waited for them to catch up, and smiled broadly. "This is obviously the smallest house on the list, and the oldest. But personally, I think it's the prettiest." She unlocked the front door and let them step inside.

"Oh wow." Mac stepped further into the room and let out a breath. "This is gorgeous."

Harm had to agree. The house looked small from the outside, but the inside told a different story. The cathedral ceiling in the living room made the space feel huge, the floors were a gorgeous, warm hardwood, and the staircase had more delicate wrought iron railings than the heavier wood in the other homes. They continued to walk around, and Marilyn continued to talk. This house didn't have a formal dining room, but the current owners had a large dining table in an alcove of the living room, and the kitchen was large enough for a good-sized table, chairs, and a large china cabinet full of decorative items. The kitchen had been recently renovated and included high end appliances, but the kitchen's true wow-factor came from the fact that one wall was nothing but windows and glass doors, and looked out over a stunning pool and back yard.

"Let's finish up in here, and then we'll go outside," Marilyn suggested. The rest of the home was just as beautiful as what they'd seen so far. The master bedroom was on the first floor, and had French doors that led to the patio, a nice sized bathroom with a tiled shower and a gorgeous soaking tub that made Mac gasp. There were three more bedrooms upstairs, all with views of the pool. They finished looking around, and then headed to the backyard. The backyard was the most incredible they had seen. The pool was large, there was a firepit off to the side, and an awning covered patio that housed comfortable furniture and a large dining table that sat eight.

They finished exploring the back yard, and then returned to the driveway. Marilyn unlocked her car and put her briefcase inside before turning back to them. "I know this one is small, but what do you think?"

"It's amazing," Harm and Mac both said in unison.

She beamed. "Wonderful!" Would you like to come back to my office and start some paperwork?"

Harm shook his head. "I'm not quite ready yet. Can Mac and I talk about this, and give you a call back in a little while?"

"Absolutely!" She glanced at her watch. "I'm going to go back to my office and do some paperwork for a few other clients. Just give me a call when you're ready." She gave them each a hug before getting back in her car.

"Let's go get lunch," Mac suggested. "We can talk while I eat a burger." Harm rolled his eyes and tossed her the keys. She started toward a nearby restaurant she knew, and tapped her fingers on the steering wheel in tune with the music.

* * *

They settled in a small booth in the back of the restaurant, ordered sandwiches and iced teas, and once the waitress took their menus and walked away Harm leaned back comfortably and studied her. "So. What do you think? Or should we write all of those off and should I come back another weekend to look at more houses?"

She raised an eyebrow. "What did you think?"

He sighed, and took a sip of his tea. "I could see myself in all of them." He shrugged. "Mac, I love you and Amelia. And I want to give you two the world. I want you both to have a house you'll be proud of."

She relaxed and reached across the table for his hand. "I love you for that. But I don't need a mini-mansion." She sighed and let go of his fingers. "Harm, if you had asked me what I saw for my dream home, I would have said just a nice, simple house. Big closet, because I do love clothes. Enough space for our family, but not so much space that cleaning is a huge chore. A pool, because everyone had one growing up. I didn't, but I always dreamed I would someday." She smiled softly. "Uncle Matt always signed me up for summer camp at the community pool. I love to swim, I love to be in the water, and those post-dinner swims at your apartment with Amelia were just perfect to me. I want a space for family dinners, but I don't need a formal dining room that we'd use maybe 2-3 times a year."

"I actually agree about the formal dining room. Especially while we'll live here, and will probably have holiday dinners over at my mom's house." She nodded and he smiled. "So, about that last house."

"I loved it." She picked up her own straw wrapper to fidget with. "It's a beautiful house."

He grinned. "I loved all of the architectural details that come with an older home." His smile faded and he grew serious. "I'm worried you're going to think I'm only saying this for your benefit, but I think it's the one. I could see us starting our family there."

She took a deep breath and nodded. "I see it too."

* * *

"God, I'm tired." Harm collapsed onto Mac's sofa and dropped his head back against the cushions. "I feel like we should be doing something crazy tonight, since I don't have Amelia with me, but I'm so tired."

The rest of the afternoon was a blur. After lunch they went to Marilyn's office so Harm could sign all of the paperwork required to buy a house, and then Harm suggested going for a walk on the beach to relax. His parents were in Berlin, but he drove out to their house and went around back to their private beach access. They had walked for a while, filling their pockets with pieces of sea glass and interesting shells. They returned to her apartment with a plan to order in Thai food for dinner, and watch a movie on the couch.

She turned her head to look at him and offered a content smile. "If you want crazy, we'll just order our Thai food extra spicy." He laughed and she moved to rest her head on his shoulder. She hopped up a second later and headed toward the kitchen. "I'm going to look for the menu." She pulled open a drawer and pulled out a massive stack of menus.

Harm stood and followed her into the kitchen, and immediately winced at the stack of menus and wondered how much takeout she really ate. "I think I'm going to go take a shower. I need to get this sand and sunscreen off of me before we eat." She nodded and he kissed her temple before emptying his pockets on the counter and heading to her bathroom.

Mac watched him for a second and then turned back to the menus. She finally found the one she was looking for and was reading over it when his cell phone started vibrating on the counter. She saw Claire's name on the caller ID and reached for it. "Hello?"

Claire hesitated for a moment, not expecting the feminine voice. "Hello. I'm looking for Harm. Is he available?"

"Hey Claire, it's Mac. He just hopped in the shower. Is everything okay with Amelia?"

"Oh, hey Mac. I didn't realize you two were together this weekend. Yeah, Amelia is fine. I just…"

She trailed off, and Mac took a seat on one of the barstools. "Sweetie, is everything okay?"

Having someone ask about her, besides Jamie, was enough to make the dam break and she started to cry.

Mac's heart ached for the younger woman. "Claire," she said softly, "talk to me. Tell me what's wrong."

Claire let out a sound that was a combination of a laugh and a cry, and wiped her eyes. "I don't really know. I'm sorry to lose it like that."

"You don't need to apologize. The holidays must be a little tough this year."

She sniffled. "They are. I really miss my sister. And even though I'm so happy for you and Harm, I'm really going to miss seeing Amelia so much when he moves out there." She took a deep breath. "Mac, is Harm mad at me? Have I done something wrong?"

"Claire-"

"When he called this morning to check on Amelia, he spoke to Jamie. And Jamie had him on speaker because he was deep cleaning one of his lenses, and I heard them. Mac, he hasn't sounded that relaxed or friendly with me in weeks. It's been on my mind all day, and I can't figure out what I've done wrong."

Mac swallowed a sigh. "You haven't done anything wrong, Claire. He's just working through some stuff right now."

"Mac, what-"

She shook her head, and then remembered she needed to use words. "It's not my place to tell you what's going on with him. He needs to do that." The line was silent for a long moment. "Claire?"

"Will he, though? Will he tell me, or is this going to be some huge thing that ruins our relationship and keeps me from having a relationship with my niece?"

"Don't let that happen. When he comes to pick Amelia up tomorrow make him talk to you. He needs it too."

"Okay." Claire sniffled and cleared her throat. "Okay. Thanks Mac."

"Anytime, Claire. You can call anytime." They said their goodbyes and Mac flipped the phone shut. She stared at it for a long time, and was jolted by a warm hand on her back.

"Did you find the menu you wanted?"

She turned to face him and stood. "Yeah." She handed it to him and crossed her arms over her chest. "Harm, you need to talk to Claire." He winced and she glanced at the phone. "She just called and when I saw her name on the caller ID I answered. She burst into tears when I asked if she was okay, and then asked if you were mad at her."

He sat the menu down. "Mac." He sighed, and reached for her. "I don't know how to talk to her. I adore Claire. She's so good to Amelia. I don't want to feel this anger toward her."

She placed her hands on each side of his face. "I know. But she's afraid that whatever is wrong will ruin your relationship, and her relationship with Amelia. You have to talk to her and clear the air. I think she'll understand why you're upset."

He nodded. "I know. And I will. I'll talk to her tomorrow."

* * *

Saying goodbye to Mac wasn't as painful as it was the first time he had come out for the weekend. They would be together again in less than two weeks for a long Christmas and New Years visit, and not long after that he'd be in San Diego for good. Knowing that made it easier.

The flight to Charlottesville was smooth, and it wasn't long before he was steering his SUV toward Claire & Jamie's apartment. He hesitantly knocked on the door and then took a deep breath. Claire answered, with Amelia in her arms, and gave him a hesitant smile, while Amelia squirmed to get to her dad. His tight smile softened as he reached for her, and kissed her forehead.

Claire realized they were still in the doorway and stepped back into the apartment. "Come in. Please." She gestured to a small stack of wrapped gifts and her overnight bag. "I thought you could go ahead and take her gifts with you. That way she can open them on Christmas morning."

Harm nodded and looked up as Jamie walked in. They two men shook hands, and Harm glanced at Claire before returning his attention to the other man. "Jamie, would you mind looking after Amelia for a few minutes? Claire, I'd like to talk to you." The both nodded, and he handed Amelia to Jamie. Claire opened the coat closet and grabbed a heavy coat and hat, and they went outside.

"Why have you been so cold with me lately?"

Harm stopped at the sound of her voice, and turned to face her. "I'm sorry about that." He continued to walk and she hurried to catch up.

They walked in silence for a few more minutes, and she abruptly stopped, and wrapped her hand around his arm. "Either talk to me, or I'm going back inside."

He took and deep breath. He didn't know how to do this – how to open up to this young woman. He had a hard-enough time talking to Mac. "I don't mean to be cold. But lately I've been… I've been feeling a lot of anger toward Claudia."

Claire stepped back, and dropped her hand from his arm. She folded her arms over her chest and swallowed. "You're mad at my dead sister?"

His eyes narrowed. "I'm angry with your dead sister because she would have been content to never tell me about my daughter. If she hadn't died, I never would have known about Amelia. I wouldn't have just spent her first Thanksgiving with her. I wouldn't get Christmas with her in a couple of weeks. And I'm so angry about that."

She softened and nodded. "I'm so sorry about that, Harm. But I tried to get her to tell you. I told her over and over and over that you deserved to know."

"I know." He took a few steps over to a bench and sat down. "I'm not mad at you, Claire. I'm really not. I'm mad at your sister." He reached into his pocket and pulled out the small silver framed sonogram photo. "I should have known about Amelia at this stage. I know Claudia didn't know much about me, but I would have been excited about her. I would have helped her."

Claire shoved her hands in her pocket and sat down beside him. "I know that." Her voice was soft. "I told her that all the time." She smiled sheepishly. "I actually looked you up on the internet. You were brave, smart. I told her that she should want her baby to have a father with those qualities like we did."

He nodded. "That's just why I've been off. And there are days where I'm completely fine, and then you call. And it makes me think of her. And I get angry all over again."

Claire sighed softly. "I don't know what to do about that. She'll always be my sister."

He shook his head. "There's nothing you can do. She'll always be your sister; she'll always be Amelia's mother. I've just got to get over it. And I will."

Claire's head shot up, and she shook her head. "No. Claudia won't be Amelia's mother. She gave birth to her and she loved her so much, but she's not the one who will raise her and love her and be there for her every single day." She looked at him and smiled softly. "We both know who that will be."

"Mac won't replace Amelia. She'll know who her mother is."

She shook her head again. "Harm, no. She can know when she's old enough to understand. But not while she's a little girl."

"Claire-"

"No." She stood up. "No. If you and Mac have other children, I don't want the other kids calling Mac mommy, while Amelia calls her Mac. I don't want her to feel like she's not as much a part of the family." She began to cry and wiped her eyes. "Harm, I want her to be the happiest little girl in the world, not to spend her whole childhood confused about Claudia."

"Okay, okay." He wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "Okay." They sat there for a few minutes while she cried softly. Finally, she stopped, and blushed as he handed her his handkerchief. "Come on. Let's go back inside." They were quiet for the walk back to her apartment. She and Jamie helped him gather Amelia's things and walked out to the car. Harm strapped Amelia into her seat, and turned back to Claire. "Are you guys doing anything for Christmas?"

Jamie shook his head. "No. We spent Thanksgiving with my parents, but they're going to Michigan to see my sister and her family for Christmas."

"Mac and my parents are coming to DC for the holiday, and I'd love it if you guys would join us."

Claire shook her head. "We don't want to impose."

"You're not. Mac would love to see you, and I know mom and Frank would love to meet you." He smiled softly. "You're her aunt, Claire. You should be with her on her first Christmas." They exchanged a look & then she nodded.

"If you're sure," she said softly.

"I'm sure." He reached out to shake Jamie's hand and leaned down to kiss Claire's cheek. "We'll see you guys soon. Good luck with finals."

He waited while they both kissed Amelia goodbye and then he got in the car and headed home, feeling lighter than he had in weeks.

**End Part Twenty-One**


	22. Chapter 22

**Title: **Raising Amelia

**Author**: PreppyPrincess5103

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing.

**Summary**: One-night stands can have lifelong repercussions.

**Notes:** I'm back! I've been struggling with writer's block for months when it came to this story. Every time I'd sit down to write, nothing would come out. I blame stress. I also blame the fact that this story is almost at its end (3-4 more parts after this one), and I'm not quite ready to say goodbye yet.

**Part Twenty-Two**

**December 22**

"Jesus, Harm. It looks like Christmas exploded in here."

He snorted and watched as she turned in a circle, inspecting the apartment. He put a squirming Amelia down, and moved closer to Mac to take her coat. He slid the thick red material off of her shoulders and placed a quick kiss on her neck. She turned her head to beam at him, and then moved further into the living room. There was a huge tree with an insane amount of presents, garland and lights framing the doors, windows and fireplace, red and white Christmas pillows on his masculine sofa, and a large photo of Amelia and Santa was matted, framed and sat in the center of the mantle, with red stockings on either side of it.

"Obviously Lily did all of this. I asked if she could pick up some things to make the apartment feel more festive for Amelia's first Christmas. She obviously ran with it."

Mac walked over to the bookcase and grinned. She would have loved to have seen Harm's face when he walked in and saw a tiny Santa figurine leaning against the model airplane that looked just like Sarah. "She did a great job." Her fingers traced the embroidered names on the stockings. Maybe one day there'd be one for her hanging with these.

He watched her trace his name on one of the stockings and smiled. She may be the one that had occasional psychic moments, but he absolutely knew what she was thinking. Amelia picked that moment to approach her and tug at her leg. He watched Mac bend over to pick her up and do something to make her laugh. "Would you mind putting her down for a nap?" She turned to look at him and nodded. "I'm going to go get the rest of your bags out of the car."

"I'm definitely getting the better end of that deal," she teased. He rolled his eyes and reached for his keys while she headed to Amelia's room. He shoved his keys in his pocket and went to the tree and pulled a red box with a simple white bow out of the pile. He sat it on the kitchen counter and then headed down to the car. Mac would be here until January 2, so between clothes and Christmas gifts, she had needed three suitcases and a carry on to get everything here. He winced at the thought of the baggage fees she must have paid. He maneuvered the bags upstairs, pleased that he had gotten everything in one trip. When he unlocked the apartment door, he found Mac sitting at the kitchen counter, her fingers fidgeting with the white ribbon.

He slid the suitcases out of the way and approached her. "Is she already asleep?"

His tone was disbelieving, and she grinned. "I've told you – I'm the baby whisperer." He rolled his eyes again and she laughed. He moved closer and bent to give her a kiss. When they parted, she gestured at the gift that hadn't been there when they had arrived. "What's this?"

He shrugged. "Santa must have brought it when I stepped out." His tone was playful, and it warmed her insides. She had known this man for years, and had loved him for nearly as long, and had never seen him so light. Especially not at this time of the year. It was a joy to watch.

"Should I open it now?" He nodded, still smiling, and she pulled at the white ribbon. She picked up the lid, parted the tissue paper and gasped. It was a red velvet stocking, just like his and Amelia's. And her name was embroidered in the same shimmering gold thread. "Oh, Harm…" She took it out of the box and despite her best efforts a tear slid down her cheek.

He moved to her and cupped her face with his hands. "Is this okay? I know we don't want to move too fast, but-"

She shook her head and he stopped. She reached up and covered his hands with hers briefly, and then she looked back at the stocking. "I've never had a stocking like this before." She bit her lower lip, and then moved her finger over her own name. "It's beautiful. Thank you."

He gestured to the mantle with his chin. "Go hang it up. There's a hook hidden in all of that garland next to mine." He watched with a smile as she bit her lower lip, and slowly moved to the fireplace. She searched through the garland and found a small hook and gently hung the stocking. She could feel Harm getting closer and smiled when he placed his hands on her hips and pulled her to him. He leaned close to her ear, and feeling his warm breath sent shivers through her body. "It's going to be a good Christmas, Mac."

* * *

**Christmas Eve**

"Mac, can you get that?"

She looked up from the gift she was wrapping, and quickly stuck a piece of tape to hold her place. She opened the front door and beamed at Trish and Frank. They all exchanged hugs and kisses, and she stepped out of the way to let them into the apartment. They both carried huge shopping bags filled with more gifts, and Mac winced as she thought of the pile under the tree she was still adding to.

Frank began putting the gifts out, and Trish scanned the apartment. "Where's Amelia?"

Mac returned to the gift she had been wrapping. "Harm's getting her ready for tonight." They should be out in just a minute."

Trish went to the fridge and helped herself to a bottle of water. "I'm so happy all three of you will be with us in California next year. This weather is just horrible."

"Yeah, San Diego has me a little spoiled." Mac smiled and gestured to the stove. "Harm made some hot apple cider. It'll warm you up." Trish's face took on a wistful expression, and she moved to the stove and bent over the pot to breathe in the fragrance.

"Oh, this brings back memories." She looked around until she saw what she had been expecting – Sarah Rabb's recipe book. She poured two mugs and took one to Frank before turning back to Mac. "Did he tell you this is his grandmother's recipe?" Mac shook her head, and Trish smiled. "Sarah made this every Christmas Eve." She took a sip of the cider and closed her eyes. It tasted just like her mother-in-law's always had.

"Amelia, look who's here!"

They all turned and saw Harm and his daughter walking into the kitchen. Mac smiled as Amelia buried her head in her dad's neck, a little shy with people watching her. She was wearing the exact same dress little girls had been wearing on Christmas for years – black velvet top, red and black plaid satin skirt, and a thick red satin bow. She wore white tights, shiny black shoes, and she had a red bow clipped in her blonde curls, and she was the most beautiful child any of them had ever seen.

Trish sat her mug down and approached her son. "Merry Christmas, darling." She kissed his cheek and held out her arms to Amelia. "Want to come to nana, sweetheart?" She hesitated for a second before going to her grandmother, and Harm moved to give Frank a hug.

Once they parted, Frank moved to his wife's side so he could fawn over Amelia, and Harm stayed where he was and took in his surroundings. This was shaping up to be the best Christmas he'd had since he was a little boy.

* * *

They had a simple dinner at Harm's apartment, and then went to a Christmas Eve service led by Sturgis' father. Trish and Frank had been hesitant to attend church with them, since all of their friends would be there, but Harm convinced him that he wanted them there. He realized as he watched Frank walk out of the church bouncing a bundled-up Amelia that he had spent more time during the service watching his family than listening to the sermon. It was common knowledge that he had never been close to his stepfather, but he was appreciating him more and more every single day. He had raised a boy that had despised him most of the time and yet he had never showed him anything but kindness and generosity.

He took Mac's hand as they followed his parents to the car. He glanced at his watch and squeezed her hand, before leaning down to kiss her cheek. He unlocked the car as they approached and watched as they began strapping Amelia into her car seat. They secured her, and then themselves, and Harm started the car. He placed his hands on the steering wheel and stared off into space for a moment.

Mac reached over and ran a hand through his hair. "Are you okay?"

He looked at her and smiled softly before nodding. "Yeah. I'm okay." He turned in his seat to face his parents. "Do you guys mind if we make a stop before going home?"

Mac's eyes widened, and Trish nodded. "Of course, sweetheart."

Harm pulled out of his parking spot and made his way to the Vietnam Veterans Wall. He was quiet and listened as Mac and Frank talked about restaurants in San Diego, and then tuned them out so he could focus on his own thoughts. He had always wondered if his dad would be okay with him bringing the others with him to the wall. Would he resent Frank being there? Frank, who had been married to his wife for nearly 25 years. Frank, who had raised his son. Frank, who was now a doting grandfather to his granddaughter.

He pulled into a parking space near the wall and put the car into park. He knew his parents noticed the sign directing them, and everyone went quiet.

"Sweetheart, we'll just wait here while you go visit."

Harm looked at his mother and shook his head. "I'd really like it if you all were there with me."

Frank reached up and clapped him on the shoulder. "It would be an honor." Harm smiled at him and took the baby from his mother. They made their way to the familiar wall panel in silence, and everyone came to a stop behind him. They all stood there for quietly, no one sure what to say. Finally, Mac stepped forward and placed her gloved fingers on the engraved name. She traced over the familiar letters and said a silent thank you. She stood there for a minute more before turning and offering them all a slight smile. She went to Harm's side and reached for his free hand.

Frank wrapped his arm around his wife, and they stepped forward. Trish or Harm didn't know this, but when Harm was younger, he would stop by the wall every time he was in town on business. He would come here and tell Harm Sr. everything that was going on with Trish and his son. He felt that was the very least he could do. The first visit had been difficult. It wasn't as if he had been happy that Harm Sr. was gone, but Frank knew that if this horrible thing hadn't happened, he wouldn't have a life he loved with a woman he adored, and he felt guilty about that. But the visits got easier, and eventually Frank would talk to him as if he were an old friend.

They stood there in silence for a moment, then Trish moved away from him and placed her palm over the name. "Merry Christmas, sweetheart." She stepped away from the wall and looked at Harm. "Would you like us to take Amelia back to the car, so you can have a little privacy?"

Harm nodded. He handed her to Mac and gave her a quick kiss. "I'll meet you guys there in a few minutes." He gave Mac the keys and watched as they walked away. He turned back to the wall and stepped closer. "Hey dad. Merry Christmas." He waited for a couple to walk by, and he took a deep breath. "I hope it's okay that I brought the family with me tonight. I wanted to bring Amelia here at least once." He took another deep breath. "Dad, I'm not going to be back here for a long time. Grams was always convinced that there is a heaven and she always told me that you were up there watching out for me. If that's true, you already know that I'm moving to San Diego next month. I'm starting a new chapter with Mac and Amelia, and I'm excited about that. I just hate to leave you. I know you're not really here, but I've always felt you more here than in any other place. Even if I don't get to come here on Christmas' anymore, please don't think that I've forgotten about you, or that I love you less." He pulled a glove off of one hand and reached out to touch the marble. "I love you dad. And I'm going to make sure Amelia knows all about you when she's older." Harm stood there in silence for another minute and put his hand back in his glove and turned to go back to the rest of his family.

* * *

Mac took off her earrings and dropped them into the dish on Harm's dresser. He had been quiet since they left the wall. She wanted to respect his privacy and give him space. But she also wanted to offer comfort if that's what he needed. She watched as he took off his tie and then he walked over to her and put one hand on her waist, and the over at the base of her neck.

"Want me to unzip you?"

She nodded and he gave her zipper a gentle tug. He slid his hands inside the back of her dress and pressed his palms against her skin. Her skin was warm, and so soft, and he needed more. He moved his hands up her back to her shoulders and pushed the dress off. He stepped back and watched as she pulled the sleeves over her hands, and let the dress fall in a pile of gray silk on the floor. He moved closer, and spent a long moment taking in her loveliness. "You are so damned beautiful."

Mac knew what he was doing. Whenever his emotions started to get the better of him, he wanted to make love. It was an easy way for him to give himself to her, and when they were finished, he had a better grasp on his emotions. She hated that he did this. She wanted him to just let go. She wanted him to tell her everything on his mind, and cry or scream if he needed to. But she also loved that he did this. She loved that he had found a way to get the feelings he couldn't find the words to express. She smiled at him. She reached around to unhook the clasp of her bra and watched his eyes darken as the navy satin joined the dress on the floor. She moved her hands to her hips and started to slide down the navy panties when he stopped her. His larger hands covered hers and he lifted her, her legs going around his waist.

Harm carried them to the bed and dropped her carefully onto it. She sank into the white duvet and looked up at him as he hovered over her. Her eyes were clouded with want, and she lay there in nothing but tiny panties and the high heels with complicated straps she hadn't taken off yet.

He was still completely dressed, but his arousal was evident in the fitted pants, and then she began to ache; desperately needing him inside of her. "Harm, please."

Harm shook his head. "Patience." He scooted back to the edge of the bed and took one of her feet in his hands. She watched as his large hands fidgeted with the strap of one shoe, and then the other. He placed a soft kiss on one ankle and began moving up her leg. She whimpered as he got close and wanted to scream when he stopped and went and repeated his movements on her other leg. After what felt like an eternity, he finally looped his fingers through the sides of her panties and tugged them down.

* * *

"Are you ready to talk?"

He turned on his side to face her and rested a hand on her hip. "I kind of feel like I'm betraying my dad by moving away."

Mac's eyes widened and she sat up. "Oh Harm..."

Harm shook his head. "Logically I know it's crazy. He's not here." He shrugged. "But this is the closest I can be to him, and I'm leaving."

"Harm, no." Her voice was soft, and she put her hands on his shoulders. "No. You're leaving DC. You're not leaving him. He will always be with you. He's such a huge part of you." She brushed hair off of his damp forehead. "He lives on in you, and he'll live on in Amelia." She was quiet for a moment as she ran her fingers through his hair. "Is this because you're leaving DC, or because you're going to be much closer to your mom and Frank?"

He sighed and rolled onto his back. "Frank and I are getting closer, and I feel guilty for that." She started to speak, and he held up a hand. "I know it's crazy. Believe me, I know. If something were to happen to me, I would want you to move on, and I would want Amelia to have a dad. I'm sure my dad felt the same. At least I hope he would feel the same. I can't imagine anyone wanting their young wife to spend the next 60 or so years in mourning."

She curled up on his side and lay her head on his chest. "I wish I had something helpful to say."

He kissed the top of her head and pulled her closer. He wished he was better with words. He wished that he could tell her that just having her here was enough. Because it was. Having her here beside him, and Amelia in the next room was everything.

**End Part 23 **


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